DEAR ABBY: I'm a happily married woman in my 30s. Although we don't have children yet, many of our friends do. Some of them have boys who are approaching or are already in their early teens.

I'm embarrassed to even ask, but what are the best ways to avoid or immediately stop unwanted just-reaching-puberty attention from young boys? I am modest in my attire, I don't interact more than I need to with them and I would never want to harm a child. But the looks and actions I get from some of them have my stomach churning. I need to know how to appropriately shut it down.

My husband just chuckles and shrugs his shoulders, saying, "They just want to talk to girls." I feel sick. Please help. -- UNWANTED ATTENTION

DEAR UNWANTED ATTENTION: Unless you have left something out of your letter, what the boys are doing is normal adolescent boy behavior. However, because you feel some of them have crossed the line, you should tell their parents.

DEAR ABBY: My sister-in-law visits from out of state each year and stays with us for about a week. When she's here she invites her friends to our house and entertains them without asking us if we mind. I feel it's extremely rude, but my husband says we need to "put up and shut up" because she's family. I feel she could easily go to their homes to visit instead of inviting everyone here.

Is my husband correct? Am I wrong thinking she's being inappropriate as a houseguest? -- CONFUSED HOST IN THE EAST

DEAR CONFUSED: As your houseguest, your sister-in-law should have been asking you and your husband whether you minded having her friends over during her visit. She should also have bought food and beverages to accommodate them, and a house gift for the two of you. However, because she has been getting away with it for years, do not expect her to change. The time to have spoken up was the first time she did it.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 22 and I'm sick and tired of letting myself get caught up with men who are already in a relationship, "halfway" single, or claim to just occupy the same house as their ex. I know some people may say I don't know what a real relationship is, or I should be enjoying my 20s instead of worrying about a serious relationship, but I have an old soul. I know I'm different from most people my age.

Could I be attracting the wrong men, or could it be my preferences in men? How can I go about attracting the right young man who wants the same things I do and isn't already tied to someone? -- WANTS MY OWN MAN

DEAR WANTS YOUR OWN MAN: Where are you meeting the men you mentioned in your letter? If it's happening in bars and clubs, it's time to change venues. As my dear departed grandfather used to say, "You won't catch trout in a herring barrel."

DEAR ABBY: Two years ago, I married a kind, hard-working man I'll call Travis. These two years have been the best of my life, and I couldn't imagine a better husband. However, I just got some news I feel is threatening our marriage.

Travis' friend from childhood, "Bethany," wants to start a family with her wife. Travis informed me that he agreed to donate his sperm to Bethany so she can become pregnant. I feel betrayed. My husband will be starting a family with his friend before we have kids! I know it may seem irrational, but I feel like he's cheating on me.

When I told him how I felt, he said I was being selfish and it was his decision. He also said it wouldn't matter because he isn't going to help raise the child. Does Travis really have the right to donate his sperm without my consent? If so, how do I suppress my anger toward him and Bethany? -- FUMING IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR FUMING: You are asking some intelligent questions, but ones that should be answered by an attorney. Your husband may be the nicest, most generous man on the planet, but there are contingencies that need to be taken into consideration before Bethany becomes pregnant. Please suppress your anger long enough to convince Travis that he shouldn't rush into this agreement without legal counsel. He may thank you for it later.

DEAR ABBY: Traditionally, husbands-to-be ask the fiancee's father for permission to marry her. Why do we never hear about the bride-to-be asking the husband's mother for her permission?

My husband asked my dad before proposing to me. I think it was a nice gesture, and Dad was delighted for him to be included into our family. Had I asked my MIL for permission to marry her son, I would have known right away she was opposed to it.

Now, three rocky years later, she's still accusing me of taking her son away from her. She tells him if he ever wants to leave me, he's more than welcome to come back home to Mommy. (His three other siblings still live there.)

Had I asked, I would have known up front that she hated me (not because of who I am, but because she didn't want her oldest to ever leave). Would I still have married him? I think I would have, but I would have been prepared for the treacherous days ahead. -- UNPREPARED FOR THE TREACHERY

DEAR UNPREPARED: You have my sympathy. When mothers-in-law from heaven were handed out, it appears you were assigned someone from as far south as one can get. She may be the reason that verse in the Bible about leaving and cleaving was included. Your situation illustrates why it's important for women -- and men -- to get to know the family of their intended before taking that trip to the altar.

P.S. Traditionally, women were considered to be the property of their fathers, which is why permission needed to be granted before they were "given" in marriage. The same was not true of sons.

DEAR ABBY: I am in a long-distance relationship with a man who lives halfway across the country. Because he's very wealthy, he arranges for all the airfare. I am a single mother and I have limited finances.

"Bruce" owns a successful business and, through his business, racks up millions of credit card points. He never pays out of pocket for any vacation expenses -- hotels, car, airfare, cruises, etc.

Because I have been flying so often to see him, I have been bumped several times from my flights and received travel credits on the airlines, which I was excited to get because now I have the ability to fly with my children somewhere.

The problem is, Bruce insists I use the vouchers only to see him since they were obtained on his points. I argued that they were my vouchers for giving up my seats. He says, yes, the seats he "bought."

Getting airfare is absolutely no skin off his nose -- he has millions of dollars and millions of points! Am I out of line here? -- BUMPED IN KANSAS

DEAR BUMPED: I don't think so. However, you are getting an insight into Bruce -- who appears to be unwilling to subsidize any travel that includes your children. If you haven't already noticed, that should be a big red flag if you're considering a future with this millionaire.

DEAR ABBY: My three best friends over the last four years recently decided to start a business together. They said I was more than welcome to join them, but financially I wasn't able to swing it. I work part-time, so I have been helping them when I can.

When we get together for dinner once a month, most of their conversation focuses on their business. But recently they discussed a shopping trip they took together. They went on a day I could have gone, but I was not invited. Should I take this -- and other similar incidents -- as a hint that our friendship has run its course? -- FEELING LEFT OUT

DEAR FEELING LEFT OUT: Talking about the shopping trip in front of you was insensitive. However, you may not have been invited because your friends were afraid you might be embarrassed it you could not participate in the shopping. You mentioned that their business arrangement is recent. They may be discussing business because that's what is on their minds.

Don't write them off or withdraw just yet. You can always do that. Wait to see how things play out.

DEAR ABBY: Help! I'm a 67-year-old man being relentlessly chased by a 68-year-old woman. I have told her I want to date other women and will be moving out of the country at the end of the year. Despite this, she is constantly trying to maneuver me into an exclusive relationship, probably ending in living together. I don't want to hurt her, but I'm at a loss as to how to get her to back off. -- HAPPILY UNCOMMITTED

DEAR UNCOMMITTED: Here's how. Tell her you can't handle the pressure she's putting on you and end the relationship now.