DEAR ABBY: I think my stepdaughter "Caroline" has an unhealthy relationship with my husband. Caroline calls him several times a day and gets tattoos just like his. When she got a boob job, she wanted to show him. She doesn't talk to me much, although I have tried to be close to her.

Caroline knows I don't approve of the way she gets money. She has a job at a local store, but wants things she can't afford, so she sleeps with men for money. Her dad seems fine with it.

They seem to have a closeness that he doesn't share with me. We are fine until she gets involved. She does things to keep her dad doing things for her so he doesn't have time for me. What should I do? I've talked to him about this, but he thinks I'm crazy. -- DISGUSTED STEPMOM IN GEORGIA

DEAR STEPMOM: You are not crazy. Your husband and his daughter have a relationship it would be an understatement to call "inappropriate."

Caroline appears to be unusually emotionally dependent upon her father. That she would show him her newly acquired "boobs" may seem strange, but it's not shocking to me. Many women who get implants show them off to anyone who will look until the novelty wears off.

What I do find appalling is a father who would approve of his daughter prostituting herself. What does Caroline's mother think of all this? If she's living, she must be beside herself. If she's dead, she must be spinning in her grave.

Frankly, I'm not sure what you should "do." If it were me, I'd remove myself from the equation.

DEAR ABBY: Can you be stalked by your spouse? My husband checks my phone for messages, checks the mileage in my car, opens all the mail and listens in on all my phone conversations. If I'm late from work, I call to let him know, but he returns my call to make sure I am where I said I was.

He accuses strange cars that drive down our street of belonging to my boyfriends. He even went into the exam room with me while I was having a physical. The doctor asked him to leave for my privacy.

He says this shows his "concern" for me. I'm being smothered. Please help. -- STALKED BY SPOUSE

DEAR STALKED: What your husband is doing is not a demonstration of concern for you. All the checking and accusations that there are other men in your life are symptoms of his insatiable insecurity and his need to possess and control you.

His behavior is not normal. He is sick, and he could possibly be dangerous. Please contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline and talk to a counselor. The toll-free phone number is 800-799-7233. You may need to create an escape plan, and someone there can help you do it.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. In the beginning, he kept his family and me apart. I thought it was because they were extremely close, but turns out he was doing me a favor given their inappropriate and cruel treatment of one another.

At my boyfriend's birthday lunch, his father called his mother the worst possible word anyone could call a female. My boyfriend and his sisters didn't seem fazed by his verbal abuse. I worry his parents' toxic and unloving relationship is something he will eventually settle for in life. Is it possible for children not to emulate their parents' example, or should I move on? -- NOT IN THE FAMILY

DEAR NOT IN THE FAMILY: Children do not automatically follow the abysmal patterns set by their parents. However, if you and this man are serious and you are contemplating a future with him, I strongly recommend that before formalizing your relationship, you seek premarital counseling together to avoid any unpleasant surprises.

DEAR ABBY: I have a question about nail-biting/finger chewing. We recently hired a new employee who is in daily contact with the public. He is a finger chewer, and his nails are bitten well below the finger tip. I am struggling with this because I had a childhood friend who chewed her fingers to the point of bleeding, and I have a strong negative reaction when I see people do it.

When, if ever, is it appropriate to speak to someone about this bad habit? I have recently learned that it is actually a medical diagnosis and can lead to gastric disorders. We all know there are many germs on our hands, and every time you put them in your mouth, you're transferring them to your intestinal tract. -- WORRIED IN THE EAST

DEAR WORRIED: I have heard of very few nail-biters who are proud of the habit. There's a saying -- not original -- that if you want someone to avoid you, just tell him something "for his own good." If you want a pleasant working relationship with this person, mind your own business and do not attempt to "help" him by offering unasked-for advice.

DEAR ABBY: I'm usually well-spoken and articulate with family and close friends. But when talking to strangers or potential employers, I tend to choke up and make no sense at all. I become anxious and forget what I want to say. Do you have any ideas why this happens? -- TALKER IN THE WEST

DEAR TALKER: It may happen because you suffer from a form of social anxiety -- one shared by many people. Fortunately, there's help for it if you consult a mental health professional. Because it is interfering with employment opportunities, you shouldn't wait.

DEAR ABBY: I am a recovering drug addict. I have slipped, as many do, but I have been clean for four years now. The problem is my family. If I look tired, trip over my own two feet (I'm clumsy) or just don't want to be around people, I get questioned, yelled at, accused, etc.

Abby, they do random drug screens at my job. I have passed every one, and I have made amends for my past wrongdoings. But the last time I was accused, after trying to express my feelings calmly, I exploded and vented my frustration. Now my family won't have anything to do with me.

Truth be told, since the breakup, I have experienced a boost in self-esteem, but I miss them. I have apologized, but they still won't talk to me.

How many times must I swallow their accusations? They say I'm in the wrong. Is it wrong that I've had enough? Should I keep apologizing or leave it be? Shouldn't they be proud that I've stayed clean? Please help. -- FED UP IN TEXAS

DEAR FED UP: They should be, but apparently they aren't and haven't trusted your sobriety, which is why they couldn't let your period of addiction go. Because you have apologized and your apologies haven't been accepted, it is time to look forward, form new relationships and move on. I think that would be a healthier path to take than continuing to beg forgiveness from relatives who are unwilling to give it and would rather punish you. Don't you?

DEAR ABBY: I have a sister who laughs after everything she says (it doesn't matter the topic). She stayed at my house for four nights and it drove me insane. I figured I could put up with it for four days, which I did, but it wasn't easy. I didn't say anything at the time for fear of hurting her feelings and/or possibly ruining her short vacation.

In addition, our main form of communication is texting (which she does often), and I swear she can put five or six LOLs in every text. I know she thinks she's funny, but she doesn't have to tell me with every sentence. This may seem like a petty thing to gripe about, but it is very irritating. (By the way, she's not funny.) Thoughts, Abby? -- SOURPUSS IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR SOURPUSS: Your sister's laughter may be more a nervous habit than an attempt at humor, so I'm glad you held your tongue. However, if all those LOLs in her texts are a distraction, you're perfectly within your rights to tell her so, and it shouldn't cause hurt feelings.

DEAR ABBY: I don't understand the new trend of asking wedding attendees to pay for the honeymoon. I'm especially put off by a couple entering second marriages for both of them. "Dick" and "Jane" are both established in well-paying careers. They are not only asking people to pay for their airfare, but also to donate cash for shopping sprees. This seems presumptuous to me. What do you think? -- INSULTED NON-ATTENDEE

DEAR I.N.A.: I agree! What you received wasn't a wedding invitation; it was a solicitation and should be regarded as such.