life

Classic Meatloaf Is Comfort Food That Warms Generations

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | May 17th, 2017 | Letter 1 of 2

DEAR ABBY: My stepmother had a recipe for meatloaf that she found in your column years ago. She made it for us often when we visited and we all loved it. However, we have been unable to locate that recipe anywhere and don't remember how to make it. Could you reprint the recipe for me? We've been trying others, but yours is the best. -- JENNA IN JACKSONVILLE, FLA.

DEAR JENNA: I'm pleased to share that recipe once again. I have made it and we love it, too. Now that you have mentioned it, when I go to the market later, I'll pick up the ingredients and make it for dinner tonight. The leftovers make wonderful sandwiches! This recipe is part of my cookbooklet set, which has recipes for appetizers, soups, salads, vegetable side dishes, main courses and delicious desserts. The set can be ordered by sending your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $14 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Cookbooklet Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. By the way, the cookbooklet set also contains a tasty recipe for turkey meatloaf for those who have sworn off red meat, which clearly I haven't.

MEATLOAF

2 lbs. ground beef

1 cup seasoned Italian bread crumbs

1/2 cup finely chopped onion

1/3 cup ketchup

1/3 cup water

1 teaspoon garlic powder

2 eggs

Pepper to taste

Salt, if desired

4 strips bacon, if desired

Heat oven to 350 F.

In large bowl, combine all ingredients except bacon. Shape into a loaf; place in 9-by-5-inch pan. Arrange bacon strips on top of meat mixture, if desired. Bake for 60 minutes. Serves 6 to 8.

Family & Parenting
life

Woman Contemplating Commitment Is Wary of Man's 'Daughter'

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | May 17th, 2017 | Letter 2 of 2

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating "Brian" for five months. We are very compatible and have discussed spending the rest of our lives together. He is 54; I am 59.

The deal breaker for me is his "daughter" ("Allison"), who is actually the daughter of a friend of his. Allison and Brian's two grown sons grew up together. She's 24.

Allison no longer hangs out, talks with or visits Brian's sons, but she is close to Brian. She has no girlfriends, no male friends and she's estranged from her parents. Brian helps her with school projects, they go to lunch, walk on the beach, text/talk on the phone, go on bike rides, go hiking, etc. He tells me he's a father figure to her.

I have met Allison and I think her behavior is a little too flirtatious for a daughter/father relationship. She also made a couple of inappropriate comments to me during our first meeting. When I mention to Brian that I don't think it's a healthy "friendship," he becomes defensive. Should I bow out now and cut my losses, get to know Allison better, or tell Brian it's me or her? -- THIRD WHEEL OUT WEST

DEAR THIRD WHEEL: Brian seems like a nice, caring person. You have known him for only five months. I vote for standing pat a while longer and making an effort to befriend Allison. If she's truly as alone as you describe, she could use an older, more-experienced woman in her life. You might even find you like her rather than feel threatened by her. However, if that's not feasible, you can always cut your losses and run, but not right now.

Friends & NeighborsFamily & ParentingLove & Dating
life

When Man Is Ready to Talk, His Wife Can't Stay Awake

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | May 16th, 2017 | Letter 1 of 2

DEAR ABBY: As the only income earner in our household of five, I work long hours. Sometimes I would enjoy talking about my day with my wife of 18 years. While she has no problem staying awake to watch TV or going out with her friends on the weekend, she usually falls asleep right in the middle of what I'm saying. It also happens in the car while I'm driving.

Contrast this to a recent trip she took with her friends where they talked and yucked it up for five hours straight. No matter how tired I am at the end of a long work week, I will do everything in my power to stay awake if there's something she needs to talk about. I can't figure out why she's not doing the same for me.

When I tell her it hurts my feelings that she doesn't think I'm important enough to make the effort to stay awake, or at least tell me she's too tired to talk, I get criticized for not being sympathetic to how tired she is. At first I thought it was true. But now I think her behavior is self-centered. Am I crazy to think this way? -- UNHEARD IN ILLINOIS

DEAR UNHEARD: You're not crazy. You seem perfectly rational to me. What your wife is doing when you try to tell her that you are hurt is accuse you of doing exactly what she has been doing. To prevent your anger from building over this, discuss it with her when she's wide awake -- in a marriage counselor's office, if necessary. Please do it before you encounter a lady who IS sympathetic and willing to listen, because there are plenty of them out there.

Marriage & Divorce
life

Dogs' Appetite for Furniture Prompts Showdown Over Walking Them

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | May 16th, 2017 | Letter 2 of 2

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have had two big dogs for several years. In general, they are well-behaved, but they have a lot of energy. I have two kids and limited free time, and my husband no longer walks them. I refuse to do it because the dogs are very strong. They have knocked me over on a couple of occasions. Because the dogs have no release, we have come home several times to find they have destroyed one thing or another in the house (chewed up walls, furniture, carpet).

I suggested dog training and/or a dog walker, but my husband refuses and promises to start walking them again (which usually lasts a couple of weeks, at most). He was raised to believe that dogs are part of the family, while I was not, so when I suggest that we "rehome" the dogs to someone who can devote more time to them, he won't consider it, saying he could never do that to a family member.

I'm at my wit's end. The situation is affecting our marriage in a number of ways. Any advice you can offer would be greatly appreciated. -- LOTS OF ENERGY IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR LOTS OF ENERGY: Gladly. Enlist your husband's help once again in walking those "family members" and suggest he take the kids along. They might enjoy the "family" outing, and it would give you some time to yourself. Your reason for not doing it is valid. You should not risk physical injury.

When he stops walking the dogs again in a few weeks -- as he will -- hire the dog walker. If he objects, ask him which is more expensive, this or fixing the damage the dogs invariably cause when they haven't had enough exercise to tire them out. I'm sure he will see your reasoning.

Marriage & DivorceFamily & ParentingMoneyHealth & Safety
life

Ex-Friend Cast Out of Social Circle Dreams of Vengeance

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | May 15th, 2017 | Letter 1 of 3

DEAR ABBY: My friend has decided she can no longer tolerate my husband. She feels he doesn't "respect" her. This is far from the truth, in my mind.

We have supported her emotionally and financially from time to time for many years. My husband does have a habit of making clunky jokes (anything for a laugh or to fill the void). But a real friend should see beyond that to the loving, supportive person he is at his core, in his heart, and forgive.

We are now banned from her social group. I find this very harsh -- cruel even. I guess my friendship doesn't count, as I'm being thrown out with the perceived trash as well. I'm depressed and angry, and I want some kind of revenge and to hurt her back. I was so happy with our little group. Now it's been taken away from me. Advice? -- TOSSED ASIDE IN NEW YORK

DEAR TOSSED: Yes. Rather than seek revenge, tell the woman how hurt you feel after having befriended her all these years. Time is our most precious commodity. The more time you spend plotting retaliation, the more space this ungrateful woman is taking up in your head, and it's not healthy -- for you.

Once you have spoken to her and gotten this off your chest, go on with your life. Continue to see others in the group on an individual basis, if necessary. If they are real friends, I'm sure they'll be glad to do that.

Friends & Neighbors
life

Role of Mom Is All-Consuming for Woman Who Seeks Adult Conversation

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | May 15th, 2017 | Letter 2 of 3

DEAR ABBY: I am a 34-year-old single mother (by choice) of a beautiful 3-year-old boy. Because of infertility problems, it took years for me to conceive. I love my son beyond measure and, when I'm not working, I'm usually shuttling him to extracurricular activities and making time after cooking and cleaning to play with him.

Because my world revolves around being a mom, I have a hard time participating in adult conversations without talking about my son and how proud and happy I am to be his mom. I realize this can be irritating to others, and it has become frustrating for me.

I'm educated, opinionated and well-read, but I seem to have lost the ability to relate to other adults and make friends away from my role as a mother. Any advice would be helpful at this point. -- PROUD TO BE A MOM

DEAR PROUD: Considering the fact that your total focus is on your child, it's not surprising he's your main topic of conversation. However, because you want to expand your repertoire, broaden it by bringing up current events, which should give you plenty of fodder for conversation.

Friends & NeighborsFamily & Parenting
life

Society's Caretakers Take Time to Care for Themselves

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | May 15th, 2017 | Letter 3 of 3

DEAR READERS: I am honored to again participate in National Women's Health Week. Women are the primary caretakers in most societies -- including our own -- but in the process, we too often forget to care for ourselves by eating right, lowering our stress levels with regular exercise and scheduling regular medical checkups. Please don't procrastinate. National Women's Health Week is a perfect time to begin. Visit womenshealth.gov/nwhw for more information. -- LOVE, ABBY

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