DEAR ABBY: I am 68 and my husband is 80. I just found out he is involved with a 40-year-old woman. He says it is not an affair because they haven't actually had sex! I don't know what to do. Can you help me? -- HEARTBROKEN IN NEW MEXICO
DEAR HEARTBROKEN: Your husband may not be having an affair in the physical sense, but he is having an emotional affair. He may be flattered by the attention he's receiving from a younger woman, or he may think he's actually in love with her. Whether she is in love with him is open to question.
However, if your husband is giving her money, you might have an argument that he is being manipulated into it, which could qualify as elder abuse. Remember, too, if you are a longtime wife in a community property state, half of the assets acquired during your marriage are yours. If he doesn't agree to end the relationship, this is something you might want to discuss with a lawyer.