DEAR ABBY: My husband is extremely critical of others. He almost never has anything nice to say about anyone. He badmouths his co-workers, friends, family members and strangers. We don't have friends anymore because he doesn't want to be around them. I don't understand his type of personality.
He thinks his way of thinking and doing things is the only right way and everyone else is wrong. He's always quick to shift the blame when something goes awry. If he accidentally bumps into someone or breaks something, it's never his fault -- the person was in his way, or the broken object was junk, etc.
What makes people this way? Is there any hope that he can change? We are nearing retirement age, and I need my space. I cannot be his everything. -- REACHED THE LIMIT IN INDIANA
DEAR REACHED: It appears you married a self-entitled misanthrope. Not knowing him, I can't guess why your husband is this way. Change is possible in anyone, IF the person recognizes the need for it and wants to change. From your description, he must be a heavy load to carry, and I doubt he will admit the need.
If you want to continue this marriage and save your sanity after he retires, you must create separate time, hobbies and relationships for yourself apart from him, and be prepared in advance for the fact that he won't like it one bit.