DEAR ABBY: Recently a guy I've known for more than a year decided it would be best for us to part ways. Before Christmas, I had asked what he would like for Christmas. His response was, "I don't want anything for Christmas -- I want you."
A couple of weeks later, he told me the pictures, nightstand, candy dishes and candleholders he had in my apartment were gifts from him because he loved me. Tonight, he packed everything up and left! I don't know exactly why, but I think it has more to do with his own issues than about me.
Abby, I feel I have been manipulated and used. Ironically, this man I thought was a friend is a psychotherapist. While we were together, he would discuss confidential information about some of his clients with me. I think I should report him, but on the other hand, I'm asking myself whether I'm only looking for revenge.
Should I leave it alone, or report him to the American Psychological Association? Or am I overreacting to losing him? I still feel really mixed up. -- VENGEFUL IN MINNESOTA
DEAR VENGEFUL: Psychotherapists are not gods, and like other human beings, they can have their flaws. I understand why you would be hurt and disappointed. However, rather than look for revenge, you should consider yourself lucky you didn't invest more time in this flake.
As to whether you should report his breach of professional ethics to the APA, I think that for the sake of the patients/clients whose trust he has betrayed, you should do exactly that -- but after your anger is no longer raging.