DEAR ABBY: I have been seeing the same dentist for a number of years and have always been satisfied with his work. He has recently begun to talk politics while he works on my teeth. While I feel he's entitled to his opinions, I don't think I should have to listen while his hand is in my mouth. He doesn't realize it, but I am very politically active with the other party.

Abby, his politicizing grates on my nerves and raises my blood pressure, but I don't know how to tell him that I find his comments to be unprofessional. If I change dentists, I could possibly encounter the same problem, especially in this area of the country.

Should I discuss it with him and hope he doesn't start withholding anesthetic or charging extra out of spite? I'm not sure how to handle this because I have dental issues and need a good dentist who will see me when I need him. Help! -- OPEN WIDE IN VIRGINIA

DEAR OPEN WIDE: It shouldn't be necessary to reveal your political affiliation to your dentist. All you have to say is that there are some subjects that you find stressful, and among them are current events, so he should please refrain from bringing them up while you're in his chair because it upsets you and raises your blood pressure.

P.S. If you feel you need more novocaine, ask for some.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I -- as well as our close friends -- are having a disagreement and would like your expert advice. There is a nice man who is blind and who frequently sells brooms and other objects in our neighborhood. Other people who have their own disabilities do the same.

I find myself making kindhearted donations to these individuals and declining to take their goods. My husband thinks we should accept the goods so we are not making a "pity" donation. I have the best intentions. Please clarify this for us, once and for all. -- BEST INTENTIONS IN INDIANA

DEAR BEST INTENTIONS: I'm not sure I agree with your husband. If you have already purchased what the man is selling and don't need to replace it, but would like to make a donation, I see no reason to take anything you won't use. Give the person a small donation, wish him a good day and keep your closets clutter-free. Sometimes less is more.

DEAR ABBY: I have been married three times. My first two husbands were unfaithful and the third was bipolar. I have finally found the man of my dreams and we recently became engaged. There is just one small problem. He has two house dogs he loves dearly and doesn't want to part with, and I refuse to have dogs in my house. Our marriage is on hold because of this. What should I do? -- STICKLER IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR STICKLER: If you are unable to share this man with his house pets, then realize that although he may be the man of your dreams, you are not the woman for him, and let him go.

DEAR ABBY: About a year ago, my daughter befriended a schoolmate. After numerous playdates, our families have become close. While my family is atheist, we know this family is devoutly Christian. Recently, after I mentioned in conversation that we "weren't religious," they invited us to their church for service. I diplomatically declined, but it felt awkward having told the mom our non-beliefs.

Since then, this family invites us to church constantly, and the mom routinely brings up Scripture while we're talking. I feel like they are trying to convert us. I'm hurt that the respect we have extended to this family isn't being reciprocated. How do I let her know she's being disrespectful to me and my family's beliefs without jeopardizing the friendship between our families? -- ATHEIST IN THE SOUTH

DEAR ATHEIST: I can't guarantee that the woman won't take offense, but it's less likely if you refrain from using the word "disrespectful." Try to remember that she thinks she's offering you the keys to the kingdom of heaven. It might be gentler if you told her that in light of the fact that you are an atheist, you find what she's trying to do to be "hurtful."

Continue to politely refuse her invitations to attend her church. If she's in the habit of quoting Scripture in normal conversation, you will have to grit your teeth and tolerate it. (Remember, we all have freedom of expression.) But I can't guarantee that you will always remain as close as you have been, not because she's hurt that you're not interested in being converted, but because at some point you may find her behavior so annoying that YOU will end the relationship.

DEAR ABBY: My wife, "Mimi," and I have been married nine years and together for 14. We have agreed that while we love each other, we are no longer "in love." We have stayed together because we're comfortable.

Mimi has just informed me that she's pregnant with someone else's baby and will be moving out soon. She is all I have known since we have been together. I feel lost and confused and sad. Do you have any advice? -- DEEPLY HURT IN TAMPA

DEAR DEEPLY HURT: Were you aware that your wife -- whom you say you are no longer in love with -- was seeing other men? If the answer is yes, then you should understand that what has happened is a logical progression. If not, then while you were comfortable with each other, you were not open and honest.

That you would feel sad is natural because there is loss involved in the demise of your relationship with Mimi. And so that this doesn't happen in your next relationship, I'm advising you to discuss this with a therapist. You have some grieving to do and it would be better if you don't do it alone.

DEAR ABBY: I need some advice about quitting smoking. I am the father of an only child and husband to a wonderful wife. But for some reason, I have not been able to find the motivation to quit. I know smoking is bad for my health, and I don't want to endanger my child's health any longer.

I have tried the gum, the patch and even prescription meds. My willpower just isn't strong and I can't quit, no matter what I try. I need the right inspiration. Can you help me stop this nasty habit? -- SICK OF IT IN MISSOURI

DEAR SICK OF IT: I'll try. As a former smoker, I'll share what worked for me. Cold turkey. First, clean house. Get rid of all the cigarettes you have stashed at home, in your car and at your workplace. Yes, even the pack you "forgot" in your jacket pocket.

Realize that your body is saturated with nicotine and it must be flushed out. Drinking LOTS of water for the first month will help you accomplish that.

Then, choose one day when you will go entirely smoke-free. Understand going in that you will crave your "fix." When that craving hits, if you must put something in your mouth, chew (non-nicotine) gum, go brush your teeth or eat a crunchy vegetable (carrot sticks, celery). If you can manage to do this for just one day, you can do it for another one. And then another, etc.

Accept that you are an addict and that your "sobriety" is something you will have to cling to with determination. Eventually the impulse to grab a cigarette will fade, but every now and then you may have an urge to smoke that comes out of left field. When that happens, get up and walk out of the room. By the time you return, the urge will have subsided. Mine did.

And one more thing -- if you fall off the wagon (and you may), think about watching your child graduate from high school or college, getting married and playing with your grandchildren. Your chances of doing those things will be better if you're not a smoker. Then get back on that wagon and start over again.

That's how I quit, and the third time I did it, it worked. (Clearly, I do not have willpower of cast iron.) If I can do it, believe me, so can you. Please write again in six months and let me know you're tobacco-free, too. I'm rooting for you.

DEAR ABBY: Can you really learn to love someone you don't find physically attractive? -- TWITTER FAN OF ABBY

DEAR TWITTER FAN: You may learn to love the person for his or her finer qualities, but I don't think you can "learn" to find someone physically attractive if the chemistry simply isn't there.