DEAR ABBY: My fiancee and I have known each other since high school. I was the "good kid" with honors and the right parents. She was considered trouble and didn't have the best home life. Rumor had it that she moonlighted as a stripper our senior year, but I always blew it off as false.

Fast-forward 12 years: I ran into her recently, and we decided to have dinner. I fell in love with her on that date. A few months went by and I mentioned the rumors. She wasn't upset and matter-of-factly explained that she did start stripping in high school and continued through college. It bothered me, but the benefits of being with her far outweighed the negatives.

Now that we are engaged, she told me she had to "come clean." She said there were times in college when she had sex with some of her regular clients. I am floored. She basically admitted she had prostituted herself. I don't know what to do. I don't want to blame her for her past indiscretions, but this is a big deal. I don't know how to let it go. Advice, please! -- GUY WHO NEEDS ADVICE

DEAR GUY: You now see your fiancee clearly -- warts and all. The problem with "falling in love" (what I define as infatuation) is that you don't yet know who the person IS. Regardless of how your fiancee financed her education, she deserves respect for being honest with you. She has done as much as she can to improve her life. You must now ask yourself if you can see past her past, and if she is someone you would be happy spending the rest of your life with. Remember, I live in Los Angeles, and in this town, her revelation wouldn't necessarily be a deal-breaker.

DEAR ABBY: I met a guy named "Ryan" about 10 weeks ago. We hit it off right away. I admit I had a little crush on him.

About a week after we met, he came out to a group of our mutual friends (me included) as gay. I'm very supportive of him, and it didn't change anything between us at all. Over the last several weeks, we have grown to be best friends and continue to grow closer and closer.

Once I found out Ryan was gay, the rational and practical part of me took over and squashed the crush I had on him in the beginning. But now that feeling is coming back even stronger.

I know our relationship can never be anything more than platonic. I guess I'm just asking how I can get over him while still maintaining our close friendship, because ultimately, that means the world to me, and I don't want to lose it. -- FRIEND ONLY, IN WASHINGTON, D.C.

DEAR FRIEND ONLY: It's not easy to think rationally when emotions are involved. Ryan may have everything you want in a man, but he will not be a romantic partner for you. If spending time around him becomes too painful, you may have to put some distance between the two of you until you regain your emotional balance.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 39 and seven months' pregnant with my husband's only child. Since becoming pregnant, I have become somewhat withdrawn due to depression. My doctor prescribed Paxil, but my husband won't allow me to take it. I don't leave the house unless I absolutely need to because he accuses me of cheating on him daily.

Two nights ago he took a single female friend out to dinner and they were gone for five hours. It hurt my feelings because in my view it was disrespectful on both their parts. When they got back, I was sitting outside and she wouldn't even come to say goodbye to me. When I asked my husband why I hadn't been invited, he said, "Neither of us wanted you there."

In his eyes he has done nothing wrong. He tells me I'm crazy and I need mental help. Am I wrong for being so upset? -- NOT CRAZY IN TEXAS

DEAR NOT CRAZY: Not at all. It appears you are married to a controlling, emotionally abusive man who may be cheating on you. One of the hallmarks of philanderers is that they will accuse the innocent partner of cheating. Feeling depressed during a pregnancy under these circumstances isn't surprising. (If you felt any other way, you wouldn't be normal.)

That your doctor would prescribe an antidepressant and your husband would "not allow" you to take it is alarming. If you have close friends and family, I urge you to tell them what's going on. And while you're at it, contact The National Domestic Violence Hotline (thehotline.org) -- the phone number is 1-800-799-7233 -- because you may need help to get safely away.

DEAR ABBY: I currently live in a situation where my husband, our two kids and I share a home with my parents, two sisters and younger brother. Sometimes it seems crowded because there is no privacy and a lack of respect.

Lately I am having a problem with my sister. Despite the fact that she and my family share the upstairs level of the home, she continues to walk around nude or in her undergarments throughout the day because she "hates" wearing clothes. At various times my family members and I have had uncomfortable encounters with her over this. I have talked to her about it repeatedly, but she refuses to cooperate.

I think it's rude, inconsiderate and inappropriate, not to mention a completely avoidable problem. What do you think? Am I wrong for being upset that her behavior doesn't change and the message doesn't seem to get through to her? -- CLOTHES-MINDED

DEAR CLOTHES-MINDED: I agree that your sister's behavior is inappropriate. She should not be parading around in a state of undress in front of your husband and children. Because she has chosen to ignore your requests, enlist the help of your parents to get the message across to her. It's their roof she's under, and perhaps they will have better luck.

DEAR ABBY: My husband cheated on me and told me to find somebody else. He moved in with the other woman and spread lies about me, telling my in-laws that I had cheated on him. He was on probation, so I reported to his probation officer that he was lying about where he was living. He was arrested for it.

He is now incarcerated and facing a two-year prison sentence. We're trying to work on our marriage, but I haven't told him that I'm the person who reported him to his probation officer. I'm still angry at him for cheating on me. When I write him, I tend to bring up what he did when he was out. I have told him I forgave him, but lately, I don't even take time to respond to his letters. What should I do? -- JUST PLAIN ANGRY

DEAR ANGRY: You're not writing to your husband because you are still angry with him, and this is another way of punishing him for leaving you. What you should do is ask yourself, honestly and rationally, if it's worth it to try and get past the fact that he not only cheated, but tried to damage your reputation as well. What you should NOT do, for your own safety, is tell him that the person who turned him in for a parole violation was you.

DEAR ABBY: I don't know what to do with my parents' wedding album. My mother gave it to me as a gift when I was a teen, and I assume it was a coming-of-age consideration. I'm now in my 30s with a career that has me moving around frequently. I have moved once a year for at least the last five years, and I have had to pack up this album and box it every time.

I think that when my mother gave it to me, she figured I would pass it on to grandchildren, but I have chosen to not reproduce. My parents' marriage was anything but storybook. What little I remember was abusive and chaotic, and my parents split up before I reached kindergarten.

While these photos are fantastic imagery of a certain era, I do not want to move them around anymore. My father has since passed, and my mother lives in a small apartment on limited means, so I don't want to return it to her. She is also quite sentimental, and I'm afraid that handing this heirloom back to her will be disruptive.

I'm getting ready to move again and don't want to schlep this unwanted item to yet another location. Any advice? -- BREAKING WITH THE PAST

DEAR BREAKING: I see no reason why you should feel compelled to hang onto a memento of your parents' failed, unhappy marriage. However, I do not think you should get rid of it without first offering it back to your mother. Although her apartment is small, she might want to make room for it not only because she's sentimental, but also because it is a part of her history -- like any other family album.

If she doesn't want it back, consider offering it to another relative -- aunt, uncle, etc. -- or your state historical society before disposing of it.