DEAR ABBY: I have been working for four years. I need to work to help my husband financially. However, over the last few months, I've felt torn about not being a stay-at-home mom.
My grandmother, who is in her 70s, has been taking care of my son full time while I work, but her health isn't the greatest now. I don't trust any of the day care in my area and can't afford one anyway.
I really want to be a stay-at-home mom, but still feel obligated to help bring in money. How do I get over my guilt for not wanting to work outside the home full time? -- STUCK IN DELAWARE
DEAR STUCK: You are not the only mother who feels this kind of ambivalence. Many others are as torn as you are.
Perhaps it would help if you focus harder on thinking about this rationally rather than emotionally. When your grandmother's health no longer allows her to care for your son, you may have to cut back on your schedule to be with him -- or your husband may need to take a second job. Also, some people manage to work from home, and you may want to explore those opportunities.