DEAR ABBY: My 15-year old daughter, "Jenny," has a best friend, "Carly," she stays with when we're out of town. My husband and I are planning a three-day trip at the end of the month. Jenny has already asked Carly if she can stay, and of course, the answer was yes.

This morning Jenny got an invitation to another friend's birthday party the Saturday of the weekend we'll be away. Although the birthday girl knows Carly, Carly was not invited. I told Jenny it would be very rude for her to leave Carly's house to attend a sleepover party that her friend wasn't invited to. My husband agrees, but won't verbally back me up. He says, "I don't want to get in the middle."

I'm trying to teach my daughter to do the right thing, even if it's hard. She's angry with me now. Any advice? -- PERPLEXED IN PHOENIX

DEAR PERPLEXED: Ask Jenny how she would feel if she had agreed to let Carly stay with her while her parents were out of town, and Carly left to attend a sleepover birthday party from which Jenny had been excluded. I'll bet she'd feel as left out and hurt as Carly would.

The plans have been made and they shouldn't be changed. However, depending upon how important it is to the birthday girl to have your daughter there, she might be willing to extend an invitation to Carly if the situation was explained to her. Suggest Jenny give it a try.

P.S. The lesson you are trying to teach your daughter is important, so stick to your guns. I'm sorry your husband doesn't step up to the plate, instead of making you the bad guy. He seems to have forgotten that parenting is supposed to be a team sport.

DEAR ABBY: I have struggled with severe acne since high school, and my hometown dermatologist was not much help. After moving to graduate school, I found a new doctor and have seen more improvement in two months under her direction than I ever did with my previous doctor. She had blood work done, which revealed that I had a hormone imbalance that was causing the acne.

There's another young woman I see often on the bus going to work. She has a bad case of acne, too, and I'd like to sing the praises of my dermatologist because I know how painful and frustrating it can be to battle it alone with an unsympathetic doctor. But I don't want to come off as a Nosy Nancy or make her feel like I'm intruding.

Should I say something and, if so, how can I broach the subject gently? -- PIMPLE PATROL IN OREGON

DEAR P.P.: Your impulse is kind, but don't do it all in one conversation. It would be more effective to do it in stages.

The next time you see her, give her a smile and see how she reacts and if she'll return it. When you see her, say hello and get to know her a little. After that, during the course of one of your conversations, share that you had an acne problem a while ago and found a wonderful dermatologist who helped you. Then ask if she'd like your doctor's name and phone number.

If you do it in stages, I don't think it would be offensive and she might be grateful to know that there is help for her problem.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a gay man in my late 40s who has worked for 10 years in the public school system with young adults and kids with special needs. I have done everything from changing preschoolers' diapers, to tutoring, travel training and teaching life skills to older children. In the process, I have encountered my share of cooperation, defiance, failure and success.

When speaking with family, friends or strangers about their parenting, I sometimes share my experiences. This is usually accepted and even encouraged, but occasionally I am put in my place by a parent who feels I must be told that what I've done "isn't the same as being a parent." Some even go so far as to imply that I should remain silent, as I have nothing of a parenting nature to offer.

I would think that making everyone feel included would be more important than official parent status, especially when discussing similar experiences. So what's the best way to handle this? I have no kids of my own; my students are all I have to share stories about. Should I just dummy up? -- SORT OF CHILDLESS IN SAN FRANCISCO

DEAR SORT OF CHILDLESS: No, but recognize that whatever you offered clearly made someone defensive. When people are in that mode, they aren't receptive to your opinion.

Remember the phrase "casting pearls before swine"? It means offering something valuable to those who don't understand that it's precious. You and I, and most parents, understand that you are rich in experience. Don't let the others get under your skin.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend, "Richard," is 15 years my senior, and the more he is involved in my life, the more overprotective he is becoming. Some of his concerns are legitimate, but it seems like he considers me more like a child or "little woman" than his equal partner.

He isn't comfortable with me walking two blocks from my house to a friend's house at night without an escort. I recently obtained my motorcycle license, and he doesn't want me riding at night. The latest issue is that he doesn't want me to walk him to his car because he would "rather me be locked safely in the house."

I think I'm capable enough to cross my front lawn at night without being attacked. How do I differentiate between legitimate concern and overprotective paranoia? -- OVERPROTECTED

DEAR OVERPROTECTED: If your neighborhood is safe, then this may be a question of how your boyfriend is presenting his concerns to you. If he is suggesting that he would prefer you be more cautious after dark, that's one thing. However, if he's insisting, then it's something else, and it could be a tip-off that he's not only "parental," but controlling.

DEAR READERS: It's 2016! A new year has arrived, bringing with it our chance for a new beginning.

Today is the day we have an opportunity to discard destructive old habits for healthy new ones, and with that in mind, I will share Dear Abby's often-requested list of New Year's Resolutions -- which were adapted by my late mother, Pauline Phillips, from the original credo of Al-Anon:

JUST FOR TODAY: I will live through this day only. I will not brood about yesterday or obsess about tomorrow. I will not set far-reaching goals or try to overcome all of my problems at once.

I know that I can do something for 24 hours that would overwhelm me if I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will be happy. I will not dwell on thoughts that depress me. If my mind fills with clouds, I will chase them away and fill it with sunshine.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will accept what is. I will face reality. I will correct those things that I can correct and accept those I cannot.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will improve my mind. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration. I will not be a mental loafer.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will make a conscious effort to be agreeable. I will be kind and courteous to those who cross my path, and I'll not speak ill of others. I will improve my appearance, speak softly, and not interrupt when someone else is talking.

Just for today, I will refrain from improving anybody but myself.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will do something positive to improve my health. If I'm a smoker, I'll quit. If I am overweight, I will eat healthfully -- if only just for today. And not only that, I will get off the couch and take a brisk walk, even if it's only around the block.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will gather the courage to do what is right and take responsibility for my own actions.

And now, Dear Readers, I would like to share an item that was sent to me by L.J. Bhatia, a reader from New Delhi, India:

DEAR ABBY: This year, no resolutions, only some guidelines. The Holy Vedas say, "Man has subjected himself to thousands of self-inflicted bondages. Wisdom comes to a man who lives according to the true eternal laws of nature."

The prayer of St. Francis (of which there are several versions) contains a powerful message:

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;

Where there is hatred, let me sow love;

Where there is injury, pardon;

Where there is doubt, faith;

Where there is despair, hope;

Where there is darkness, light;

And where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,

Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;

To be understood, as to understand;

To be loved, as to love;

For it is in giving that we receive,

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

And so, Dear Readers, may this new year bring with it good health, peace and joy to all of you. -- LOVE, ABBY