DEAR ABBY: My dear friend "Iris" is having her annual Halloween party. Each year I wear a costume I pull together without spending extra money. This year I'll be dressing as a cowgirl, and I have arranged to borrow a few items for the costume.
As a rule, I keep my costume a surprise and don't ask others what they're going to wear. By chance, Iris and I ran errands together and she wanted to pick up her husband's costume while we were out. She chose a cowboy costume.
I considered changing my costume, but then I started wondering why I should, when I had already made arrangements. Before Iris paid for the costume, I told her about mine. She put her husband's costume back and said she'd select something else later.
There was no argument, but I wonder if I was obligated to tell her. Would it have been bad if I had just gone ahead and shown up as a cowgirl without saying anything? -- WONDERING IN THE WILD WEST
DEAR WONDERING: It would only have been "bad" if Iris had planned to dress as a cowgirl to complement her husband's costume. Personally, I think you did the right thing by being up-front.