DEAR ABBY: It's Father's Day. Maybe now is the time for people to forgive, forget and remember how wonderful their dad was when they were growing up.
I am dating a man whose two grown children live out of state. He and his wife divorced when the kids were young, and he tried hard to keep a good relationship with them. But even with the best intentions, there are sometimes obstacles that get in the way.
He loved being a father and tells me stories about singing songs to his kids at bedtime and getting down on the floor to play with them. I can see how much he loves them and how painful it is for him to not have them in his life. He has no idea why they are distant. I suggested he ask them directly what happened. He said he has tried, with no response.
I'm not saying he's a perfect man, but he is kind, generous and loving. He has many more good qualities than bad. He hasn't heard much from his children for several years, and I think the best gift he could receive this Father's Day would be a simple phone call. No card or necktie would mean as much. Life is short and precious. Holding on to negativity or the past is so much more work than letting it go and forgiving, and it's good for the soul. -- WISE LADY FROM THE MIDWEST
DEAR WISE LADY: If your boyfriend was present in his children's lives in spite of the divorce while they were growing up, it's possible they may be so involved in their own lives that they have "forgotten" their dad might appreciate hearing from them. Feeling as you do, continue to encourage him to reach out to his kids.