DEAR ABBY: When I turned 25, after considering it for years, I went to my doctor and told him I wanted to become sterile. I got a vasectomy two months later. I haven't had any regrets, and now at 27, I'm still firmly convinced that I don't want children -- ever.

I started dating a woman a year ago, "Anita," who told me that if she never had kids, she could live with it. I felt lucky to have found someone who would be OK with no kids.

I have had a few issues with Anita. When she gets upset from time to time, she says that if she stays with me, she will never have kids. I know she cares for me deeply, but I also believe she feels conflicted about giving up the chance to be a mother.

Do you think it's fair for me to pursue this relationship and hope that eventually she'll come to terms with not having children with me? Or should I end the relationship so she can find someone who shares her desire to become a parent? I worry that if I end it, it may take years before I find someone who shares my wish to never be a parent. -- NO KIDS IN COLORADO

DEAR NO KIDS: You have been upfront with Anita. She understands that you do not want children, and that you have taken steps to ensure it won't happen. She's correct that if she stays with you, she will never have any.

For both your sakes, the two of you need to talk this through once and for all, because if Anita is ambivalent about forgoing motherhood, she does need to find another life partner. And you need to let her do that.

DEAR ABBY: It happened to me again yesterday. After I had been waiting patiently at the counter of a large department store, another woman came up and stood beside me. The clerk walked over and immediately began to ring up the other woman's purchase. I said, "I was here first!" Both the clerk and the woman apologized, but because the sale had already begun, the salesclerk completed it and I was left waiting.

I am angry about it. I feel stores should have a queue where you get in line in order, or clerks should be instructed to ask, "Who was here first?" I don't want to believe I was passed over because the other woman looked more prosperous than I do, but she was buying a very expensive handbag, while I was purchasing socks that were on clearance. How should that be handled in the future? -- SHOPPER IN KENTUCKY

DEAR SHOPPER: If you have a complaint about service, it should be addressed to the store manager. A well-trained retail salesperson would have asked which of you was there first. The amount you were spending should have made no difference.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I travel with another couple. I furnish the vehicle and do all the driving. How should we share the expenses? -- EASY RIDER IN NORTHERN CALIFORNIA

DEAR EASY RIDER: The other couple should pay for half the gas and their own meals and lodging.

DEAR ABBY: My wife, "Connie," and I have been together for 30 years and have a wonderful marriage. She's a schoolteacher, and I travel on business often. I think the time away from each other is good; it gives us a chance to enjoy some "me" time.

Connie is a genuinely nice person and makes friends easily, which I admire. However, over the last five years she has become very close with a divorced woman who teaches at her school. They text each other seemingly nonstop, and when I travel, they always get together for a movie or dinner.

I like Connie's friend, and I used to be included -- or at least invited -- to anything they did. Now, if I suggest we all go out, Connie says her friend has other plans or she's sick.

I'm not really concerned that there's any kind of physical relationship between them, but I feel their friendship has become like an "emotional affair." When I brought this up with my wife, she said, "You don't want me to have any friends?"

What bothers me is that I used to be Connie's best friend, but I feel I have been replaced. She tries to reassure me I'm still No. 1, then goes off into her bathroom to text with her friend. I think it's obvious she gets something from this relationship that she doesn't get from me. Do you think friendships between women can evolve into emotional affairs? -- SHUT OUT IN TEXAS

DEAR SHUT OUT: Women communicate with other women on a different level than they do with men. You and your wife and her woman friend may have felt like the Three Musketeers years ago when the three of you would all get together -- but it's possible that after a while her friend began to feel like a third wheel.

Who can say why she doesn't want to socialize with you. Perhaps you don't have enough in common, or perhaps she has sensed that you are jealous of her friendship with your wife. But I wouldn't call close friendships among women "emotional affairs" because I don't think it's true.

Since this bothers you enough to write to me, and Connie seems to be communicating in secret, please discuss this in depth with her.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend, "Luke," and I go to the gym together four to five times a week. Yesterday, there was a man on a treadmill who was sweating profusely. I kid you not, it was coating the treadmill. Luke tends to speak loudly, and he occasionally forgets to turn on his filter. When he saw what was happening, he exclaimed loudly, "That's disgusting." I nudged him and told him he was being rude, but unfortunately, we think the man heard him.

Luke is actually a kind and sensitive person, so he instantly felt awful. This man is a frequent gym-goer and is often there when we are. Luke wants to apologize, but he's worried that if the man didn't hear him, he will have to explain what he said. What are your thoughts? -- FILTERLESS IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR FILTERLESS: Luke was out of line, but at this point, he should let it go or he may further embarrass the man. Sweating during aerobic exercise is normal and healthy, and not something that a person can control. If, when the man was finished with the machine, he wiped it down, he was acting appropriately. (Unfortunately, not all gym members do.)

DEAR ABBY: We have two granddaughters who will be going to college soon. We are in a position to help them with expenses, but we are asking you if we should.

We put our daughter through college, and she has a career in the medical field. Her husband has a part-time, low-paying job and has shown no ambition to find other employment to assist with college expenses for the girls.

He's into electronics, and when he wants a new item, he has our daughter work overtime to buy it for him and she does! He has told our granddaughters they must pay for their own education because that's what he had to do, although he never graduated. (His father told us it isn't true -- that they would have helped.)

We have helped them out financially over the years, which of course enables our son-in-law to not improve himself. We realize that they quite often play us and think we are too ignorant to realize we are being taken advantage of. I believe that further education for their girls is a no-brainer because we want them to be able to support themselves, but where should we draw the line? -- GRANDMA IN TROY, OHIO

DEAR GRANDMA: Stand pat before writing any checks; look at your granddaughters' grades and ask yourselves if they take after your daughter or her husband. If they take after him, they may be more interested in a trade school instead.

Depending upon their ambition and aptitude, they may qualify for scholarships or student aid. They could also get part-time jobs to help pay for books or tuition, which would help them to grow into independent young women.

By now it should be apparent that it's time to draw the line. If you decide to pay for your granddaughters' education, be sure that any money they'll be getting goes to the school.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 21-year-old female living in Washington, D.C. Today, while on the Metro coming home from work, a group of eight high school kids hopped on, excited about what they had in their backpacks.

After they sat down across the aisle from me, I saw they were pulling handfuls of clothing out of their backpacks and attempting to take the sensors off the clothes. I heard a couple of them exclaim how excited they were about their new clothes, and one of the boys said, "I'm never paying for any clothes ever again."

Now I feel guilty that I didn't report anything to the authorities, or at least tell the boys the consequences of their actions weren't worth the possible repercussions. However, because I was a female traveling alone at sunset, I didn't want to involve myself in a possibly dangerous situation. What would your advice be on how to handle this encounter should it happen again? -- METRO RIDER

DEAR RIDER: You handled the situation correctly. If you are ever again alone in a situation in which you feel unsafe, particularly if you are outnumbered by individuals you think are up to no good, you should get away as quickly and quietly as possible.

P.S. If you have any idea where the clothes may have come from, call the store and the police and tell them what you saw.

TO MY CHRISTIAN READERS: A happy Easter to all of you!