DEAR ABBY: My husband and I were chatting recently and the subject of sperm donation came up. He surprised me by saying he's vehemently against it, and then compared it to selling your body as in prostitution. He also mentioned he thinks it's disgusting because any kids we would potentially have might end up dating their half-siblings. We let the issue drop, but Abby, I have a secret.

In my early 20s, I participated in an egg donation program to support couples who were unable to get pregnant on their own. At the time, I didn't think much about it. I didn't want kids -- and I doubt if I ever will -- so I figured it was my contribution to the gene pool without having to raise little humans myself.

I never told my husband about it because it happened before we met. I do know that some of my eggs were successfully transplanted.

Should I tell my husband about my donations or keep quiet? We don't have kids, but are talking about trying in the near future. Would it be wrong for them to go out into the world not knowing about their half-siblings? -- FERTILE MYRTLE

DEAR MYRTLE: The time to have spoken up was when your husband aired his feelings on the subject of sperm donation and infertility issues. You did a wonderful thing and with good reason. Your husband should be made aware of that, with no apologies.

If you do decide to start a family, considering that there are half-siblings out there, it would be wise to advise your children to have genetic testing done with their prospective spouses. (Because there are diseases caused by recessive genes, it's a good idea anyway.)

However, unless you are sure that you want to bring a child into this world, you shouldn't become a parent.

DEAR ABBY: I am 29 and on the fence about what to do. My 32-year-old boyfriend of a year and a half, "Aiden," proposed while we were in Europe last month. Aiden is a sweet guy who would do anything for me. I waffled and said I had to think about it. He bought a lovely engagement ring that he still has in his possession. We do not live together.

Aiden says he's certain he wants to spend his life with me. My problem is, I don't want to marry him. I am a professional, and Aiden is a tradesman with no money. Even though he kisses the ground I walk on, I don't think I'd be happy in the long term with him and would always wonder if I could have done better.

On the other hand, I am almost 30 and want children. It seems that nice guys who want to commit are in short supply. Should I settle for Aiden? Breaking up with him, as I did a few months ago for a couple of weeks, would crush him. But he has little social life and no hobbies -- just me. -- CONTEMPLATING IN ALBERTA, CANADA

DEAR CONTEMPLATING: Nice guys who want to commit may be in short supply, but please do this nice guy a favor and end the relationship before you hurt him any more than you already have. Tradesmen can be good providers, husbands and fathers, and Aiden has much to offer a woman who can appreciate him fully. Clearly, that's not you, so let him go.

DEAR ABBY: I've been married more than 20 years and have three children. What I haven't had is a real desire for sex -- nor have I ever had, as far as I know, an orgasm. Before my wedding, my mother warned me that sex was overblown, uncomfortable and messy, but she said I had to put up with it if I wanted kids and a good marriage.

Movies, TV shows and ED ads all suggest that "normal" women are just looking for the next opportunity to jump into bed with their man. Am I a freak? Are there others like me? What do I tell my girls as they grow up? -- WAITING IN WICHITA

DEAR WAITING: Your mother did you no favor by saying what she did about sex. Sex can be "messy," but it is also supposed to be pleasurable, and both parties should be able to enjoy it. If sex is painful, then something is wrong.

I would never label you a freak. However, you may be asexual, because some people are. If you have never experienced an orgasm, you may have married a man who was also sexually inexperienced.

It's a mistake to judge what sex is supposed to be like from media and/or advertising. People pitching products can be notoriously unreliable, and some television shows and movies strive for shock value. Your gynecologist would be a far more reliable information resource.

As to what to tell your daughters, there are many books on the subject, and your gynecologist may be able to recommend some literature. But please do not give your daughters the same message your mother gave to you, because it was wrong.

DEAR ABBY: I have two daughters, "Mary Beth," 48, and "Anne," 50, who do not talk to each other. The last time we were all together was a family vacation in 2010. They live in different states, and I travel to visit them for the holidays. They have similar lifestyles -- married, children, work outside the home -- but they don't reach out to each other.

When Mary Beth wrote her feelings to Anne, they were viewed as hurtful and vindictive. I received a copy of the letter, but I didn't think they were. That was two years ago, and Anne never sent a reply. She said, "Oh, Mom, I don't know what to write. Can you help?"

Frankly, I think Anne prefers the lack of contact with her sister, and that even though they are sisters there is no bond between them. What do you suggest? The silence is unbearable. I want to hear the "noise" again. -- DISAPPOINTED MOM IN RENO

DEAR DISAPPOINTED MOM: Nowhere in your letter did you mention how Mary Beth feels about the fact that her letter may have caused an estrangement. As an adult, Anne should have responded to that letter. It isn't unusual in families that are geographically separated for sibling bonds to loosen. Work, marriage and children can be profoundly distracting.

I'm advising you to continue to see both daughters, but not involve yourself in their relationship. I'm not sure what kind of "noise" you're looking for, but if you poke into this, it could be an explosion.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have two daughters whom we have taught to use good manners. We are proud that they always remember to use their "pleases" and "thank yous" and many people have commented how polite they are.

My problem is the majority of their friends have little to no manners at all. They never thank me when we carpool places or take them out for lunch or dinner. I rarely hear "yes, please" when I offer food or beverages at my home. Even my daughters say it at home!

Should I correct their behavior by asking them "What's the magic word?" Should I tell them I want them to use their manners when they are with me? Should I speak to the parents about it? Or am I expecting too much? -- MANNERS MAVEN

DEAR MANNERS MAVEN: I'm sorry you didn't mention how old your daughters' friends are, but if they are over the age of 10, I recommend against asking, "What's the magic word?" It would be more diplomatic to talk to the girls privately and convey your message.

If you prefer they use better manners in your home, it is your right to say that to them. However, if you call the parents, the parents may think you are criticizing their parenting skills (and they wouldn't be wrong).

As to whether you are expecting too much, frankly, you may be. Sadly, adults who never learned good manners themselves can't pass them on to their children.

DEAR ABBY: About a year ago, I loaned a small amount of money to a close friend I have known since childhood. She promised to pay me back, but has yet to do so. I wasn't too concerned because it was a minimal amount, but a few months ago she asked to borrow a larger amount. Again, I didn't hesitate to help her out because she has been there for me several times in the past in important ways -- although they weren't financial.

Because the recent loan was a large one, I would like to be repaid. How do I tactfully ask her for the money without seeming petty or like I'm nagging? (I don't like confrontation.) And is it too late to ask that the previous smaller amount be included as well? -- FRIEND, NOT AN ATM

DEAR FRIEND: You don't have to be confrontational, and I wouldn't advise it anyway. In light of the fact that your friend has made no effort to repay the first loan for an entire year, it would be neither pushy nor nagging to ask when she intends to start. If she can't come up with the entire amount, perhaps she can repay a little each month. However, if she can't/won't start paying you back, you may have to accept that you won't be getting any of your money.

In the future, you should not lend anyone money without first getting a signed note stating that the money is owed to you and when it will be repaid. That way, if necessary, you can take the matter to court and have a leg to stand on when you get there.