DEAR ABBY: I'm 18 and smarter than many people realize. I carefully evaluate every situation to find the best solution, but I can't find one for this problem. My boyfriend, who I've been with for two years, has recently started watching hermaphrodite porn on a website where there are naked pictures of local girls.

"Roy" has admitted he knows several of the girls on the site. When I told him it makes me feel insecure, he lied and said he hadn't been on it. Even though I showed him the history, he still denied it.

I don't know what to do. I feel uncomfortable with him now. I feel like I'm not satisfying him or that he wants someone else. -- INSECURE IN MASSACHUSETTS

DEAR INSECURE: While Roy may have been embarrassed to have been caught, I am still troubled by the fact that he wasn't honest with you. Whether you're not satisfying him is beside the point.

That he lied to you in the face of evidence to the contrary should be a wake-up call. The question becomes -- what else has Roy been less than truthful about? Does he have a fetish? Is he bi-curious?

It would benefit you if you could have an honest conversation with him about it. I don't blame you for feeling uncomfortable right now. Rather than search for shortcomings within yourself, take a long, hard look at Roy. Do you need a boyfriend you can't trust, particularly if you think he may have had sex with some of the individuals who appear on a porn site?

DEAR ABBY: My mother asked me on one hour's notice to take her on an errand. Although I wasn't planning on going out that day, I obliged. Because she's elderly, I parked as close to the door of the business as I could. I honestly didn't see any signs or any parking meters. When we came out, there was a $25 ticket on my vehicle. I was so upset Mom gave me a $20 bill to help.

She now says she did it because I made her feel guilty and, since it is my car and she's my mother, I should pay for the whole thing and return her money! I wouldn't have been there in the first place if I hadn't been doing her a favor. I offered to pay $15 if she'd pay the rest. She refuses.

DEAR DAUGHTER: It's a shame your mother reneged on her offer, but she wasn't the person who was driving that day. I sincerely hope you won't let $20 cause a rift in your relationship because it would be childish.

In the future, look more carefully to see how the parking is posted -- and now that you know your mother can manage, be less solicitous when you're choosing a spot. (If she really isn't able to walk far, then her doctor will give her a handicapped parking tag for you to hang on your rearview mirror when you're driving her.)

DEAR ABBY: We are writing in response to the question you printed (Jan. 13) about where to find affordable counseling. Your suggestions were helpful, but we want to share another one:

2-1-1 is an easy-to-remember telephone number that, where available, connects people to information about critical, free or low-cost health and human services in their community. 2-1-1 reaches about 270 million people (90 percent of the U.S. population), covering all 50 states, the District of Columbia, Puerto Rico and Canada. It is a free, confidential resource.

Similar to dialing 9-1-1 for emergencies, calling 2-1-1 helps people seeking training, employment, food pantries, shelter, assistance for aging parents, addiction prevention programs for teens, affordable housing options and support groups. It provides a one-stop service for community referrals.

Abby, won't you share this information with your readers? Everyone knows someone who needs help. 2-1-1 is there for them. -- STAFF OF 2-1-1, ORANGE COUNTY, CALIF.

DEAR STAFF: I'm pleased to pass along this important resource, which serves such a large portion of the population. Thank you for taking the time to offer it to my readers.

DEAR ABBY: I am 28 and engaged to marry a wonderful man, "Ryan." Before I met him, I was involved in an affair with my married boss and was deeply in love with him. (I still am.) We continued our affair even after I met Ryan, and now I think I'm pregnant. I told my boss and, naturally, he's not happy about it.

I don't know how to tell Ryan or if I even want to. I have always wanted to be a mother, and now I have the chance. But I may end up doing it alone in poor financial shape. I also won't have a home to live in once my old-fashioned mother finds out I've gotten myself pregnant before marriage. Any advice? -- SCARED STUPID IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR SCARED STUPID: Yes. Take a pregnancy test to determine if you really are pregnant. If it turns out that you are, then you must tell your fiance everything. Even if Ryan walks away, the baby's father will be legally responsible for child support.

It is important that you also tell your mother what's going on. She may not be thrilled to hear the news, but I doubt she will put you and her grandchild-to-be out on the street. A generation or two ago that might have happened, but no longer.

DEAR ABBY: I know if a girl breaks off the engagement, she's supposed to return the ring to her ex-fiance. Does the situation of a wife filing for divorce fall under the same set of rules? I need a response soon. -- CRAIG IN HOUSTON

DEAR CRAIG: No. If the rings were given with the promise of marriage and the promise was fulfilled, she is not expected to return them.

TO MY IRISH READERS: A very happy St. Patrick's Day to you all. -- Love, ABBY

DEAR ABBY: My wife, "Barb," and I have been married for 21 years, and like any married couple, we've had our ups and downs. We recently visited my mom, a widow in her 80s. Barb caught a cold while we were there and needed to stay in bed while Mom and I visited family.

I noticed Mom was letting the cleanliness of her bathroom go, but Barb and I never discussed it. When we got home, our good neighbor friends told me that Barb had texted them a photo of Mom's bathroom while we were away. I was shocked and embarrassed. I feel like my wife was talking about me and my family behind my back. Barb insisted she was just poking fun at the situation. If that was the case, I should have been involved in the "fun."

This isn't the first time something like this has happened. I feel like my trust and friendship have been violated. Am I overreacting? -- LEFT OUT IN INDIANA

DEAR LEFT OUT: Because this isn't the first time your wife has done something like this, and I presume you have let her know how you felt about it, I don't think you're overreacting.

Talk to your mother to see if there's a reason she's unable to keep up with her housework. She may need to be evaluated by her doctor to make sure she's OK. If something is wrong with her, it is not the least bit "funny." In fact, for your wife to subject your mother to ridicule is hostile. It's time to find out what's at the root of your wife's antics.

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating my 30-year-old boyfriend, "Jonah," for a year. He seems to be obsessively addicted to a computer video game he has played for five years. He plays many hours a day -- first thing in the morning, last thing at night and all his free time in between -- although he willingly goes on outings with me when I ask.

Even when Jonah isn't on his computer playing the game, he reads the discussion forums online with his mobile device. It's affecting our relationship. It also doesn't help that he recently lost his job.

I don't like seeing him waste his time on this and his lack of ambition about the important things in life. What can I do to help Jonah, or is this normal? -- GAME OVER IN THE NORTHWEST

DEAR GAME OVER: When a hobby interferes with relationships, it is not "normal." Exactly when did Jonah become "obsessively addicted"? Was he this way when you met him? If this has been going on for the entire year you have been together, your boyfriend may be more comfortable in the cyber world than in this one. However, if this escalated when he lost his job, the video game may be his attempt to cope with depression.

Jonah would be better served by devoting the attention he's lavishing on the game to finding a job. If you want to help him, suggest that he spend more of his time in the real world until his life is settled again -- and tell him that if he's depressed, he should talk about it to his doctor.