DEAR ABBY: I'm a 12-year-old girl and I like a boy named "Chris." We go to different schools now, and I don't know how to get in touch with him to tell him how I feel. At times for the past two years we have been flirting on and off. We will be reunited again next year. I can't hold on much longer, and he's at a school with his ex. What should I do? -- LOVER GIRL IN ALABAMA

DEAR LOVER GIRL: You have held on this long, so remember the school year is already more than half over. In the fall, you and Chris will be attending the same school again without your having to do anything.

For now, be patient. Stay active and involved with school, and time will pass more quickly. Focus on activities you enjoy and your friendships.

Do not waste your time worrying about the other girl. She and Chris are exes for a reason. If you and Chris are "meant to be," the chances of that happening will be better when you're classmates.

DEAR ABBY: A friend from high school has invited me to her wedding in September. Unfortunately, I won't be able to attend the bachelorette party I was also invited to.

Even though I sent my regrets to the organizer of the party, she has tried to solicit gifts from me twice. This seems extremely tacky, and it has made me feel I was invited only for the gifts I could bring.

Abby, I don't want this to reflect poorly on my friend. Should I tell someone in the wedding party so they can fix this faux pas, or am I wrong about wedding etiquette? -- PERPLEXED IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR PERPLEXED: You're not wrong. That the party organizer is trying to extort gifts from you is extremely rude. The person to inform is the mother of the bride. She should be able to put a stop to it before anyone else is embarrassed.

DEAR ABBY: What if someone wants to move away from one parent but not the other? I'm 25 and interviewing for jobs. It would be nice to become independent, but for the right reasons. I am tired of my father's selfish, ignorant attitude, but I would miss seeing my mother. As she gets older, she seems to accommodate my dad's all-for-himself attitude even more.

If I take a job that's out of state, I don't want to feel like I'm "running away." How should I approach leaving the one family member I care about? -- MOVING FORWARD IN MASSACHUSETTS

DEAR MOVING: Continue interviewing for jobs for which you are qualified, regardless of where they are located. If more than one company wants to hire you, select the one that offers the best wages and benefits and seems to be the best fit for you.

If the company is located in your city, you may not have to leave your mother and you may be able to limit the time you must spend with your father. Should you get an enticing offer that bases you in another location, to accept it would not be running away; it would be making an intelligent career choice. Your mom might be able to visit you sans Dad periodically if the expense isn't prohibitive, and you would be establishing your independence for the right reason.

DEAR READERS: If you live in a state in which daylight saving time is observed, don't forget to turn your clocks forward one hour before going to bed tonight. Daylight saving time begins at 2 a.m. tomorrow. Hallelujah! It's my favorite "holiday."

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are both Caucasian. Recently, we adopted a beautiful mixed-race baby girl. She's Vietnamese, African-American and Hispanic. She is not even 4 months old, and already we have experienced some negative comments from strangers.

Where we live is progressive and open-minded, and I'm not so much concerned about our neighborhood or schools. But I'm no dummy. I know we're going to encounter people who have "questions" or unwarranted "opinions" (to put it nicely).

I'm not trying to educate those who choose to remain ignorant, nor reason with the unreasonable, or even explain our family and our choices. I just want a quick, witty response that tells people their not-so-nice comments are unwelcome and, to put it frankly, back off. Any suggestion? -- OPEN-MINDED IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR OPEN-MINDED: According to the 2010 census, 9 million Americans (2.9 percent of the population) are multiracial. It also showed that the number of people who reported multiple races grew by a larger percentage than those reporting a single race.

Frankly, I don't think you should say anything "witty" to a bigot. Just smile and say, "It's the wave of the future. Get used to it."

DEAR ABBY: For the past year I have been with a man I love dearly. We live together and share our lives as independent young adults.

The problem is his mother. She was cold and distant to him when he was a child, and her emotional abuse has continued into his adulthood. Holidays are a nightmare, visits a chore, and his phone calls with her often leave him in tears.

I wanted him to come with me to spend the holidays with my family, but she guilted him into spending them with her. I hate seeing him go through this, and I don't know what I can do about it. I think she is a toxic influence and he needs to cut her out of his life altogether. Advice? -- PROTECTING MY GUY

DEAR PROTECTING: What you think about his mother isn't as important as what your boyfriend does. From your description, their relationship is unhealthy. My advice is to encourage your boyfriend to discuss this with a licensed mental health professional. If he does, it may give him the incentive he needs to distance himself from her.

P.S. When the next family holidays come around, by all means invite him to spend them with your family. That way he will have a chance to see how a normal family functions.

DEAR ABBY: When my in-laws come for dinner, they ask what they can bring. I always say "absolutely nothing," but they bring dessert or a bottle of wine, and then take the uneaten dessert or uncorked bottles of wine home with them. What's the rule of etiquette when someone brings items to a party? -- WONDERING IN FLORIDA

DEAR WONDERING: When guests bring something to their hostess -- a bottle of wine or dessert -- it is considered a gift. For guests to commandeer the leftovers without them having been offered is poor manners.

DEAR ABBY: A family member, "Bill," likes to come visit in the afternoons and, because he's not comfortable driving in the dark, he always plans to stay overnight. When he does, he wakes up very early, often before 6 a.m.

Bill tries to be as quiet as possible, but we know when he is up. Our dog hears someone moving around and thinks it's time to go out and eat. My husband or I will get up to take care of our dog, but at that point, it seems rude to go back to bed. My husband likes to go back to sleep, but I feel I should get up and entertain our guest. Is it bad manners to go back to sleep even though it is still very early? -- TO SLEEP, OR NOT TO SLEEP

DEAR T.S. or N.T.S.: If you need your sleep, go back to bed. The right amount of sleep is important, and not getting it can ruin one's entire day.

If you're concerned about Bill not having a good breakfast, before going to bed, put the coffeemaker on "automatic" and show him where the cereal is kept. That's not being a bad hostess, and I'm sure Bill will be just fine.

DEAR ABBY: My letter is in response to "A Mom in Connecticut" (Dec. 27), who feels she is being "fitted in" because her daughter calls her only while driving in her car.

My daughter calls me almost every morning on her way to work. She calls me her "commute buddy." It gives us 10 to 15 minutes to catch up, vent about "stuff" on both ends of the phone, or just chat. I can tell when she arrives at work or very nearly, and we always end with "Love you."

I love our conversations and the fact that although she has an extremely busy schedule she finds the time to chat with me. She uses her hands-free phone, so I don't worry too much about her being distracted. -- SHEILA IN PRESCOTT, ARIZ.

DEAR SHEILA: You may not be worried about your daughter using a hands-free phone, but others have a different view. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: Drivers on cellphones -- even hands-free -- are four times more likely to crash and hurt themselves or someone else within five minutes of making a call. Texters are 23 times more likely to crash. More than 3,000 people are killed this way each year and 300,000 to 500,000 are injured. The daughter should not be using a phone at all while driving.

How do I know the statistics? My son was killed by a driver on a cellphone. -- GARY IN KENOSHA, WIS.

DEAR GARY: Please accept my condolences for the tragic loss of your son. You are generous to have written. Too often people take the privilege of driving for granted, forgetting that if they don't concentrate fully on driving, they place themselves and those around them in danger. I see this happen often, and I'm afraid that unless the consequences are draconian, it will continue.