DEAR ABBY: I'm a 27-year-old woman trapped in a loveless marriage. My husband is a few years younger, and very co-dependent. Before he dated me, he had never had a girlfriend or a sexual encounter. I came into the relationship with a child and some trust/fear issues because my ex had abused me.

My husband has now become verbally, sexually and to a lesser degree, physically abusive, to the point of striking my 5-year-old son. I threw him out for that, but caved to pressure from my family to take him back. They think he's a "stabilizing" influence in my life. They don't know about, or can't grasp, his abuse or the abuse I survived previously. If I hint at it, they accuse me of "lying for attention."

My husband has left for basic training with the army and will be gone for a few months. I already feel freer, lighter and more able to cope with things. If I leave him while he's away, the social and family repercussions will be devastating. My son and I may be forced to relocate.

I'm torn and afraid. I went through with the marriage only to please my family, as the abuse started before the wedding. It has been a year and a half, and all I can think about is getting out. Help me, please. -- CANADIAN READER

DEAR READER: Of course I will help. Deciding to leave an abusive partner can be wrenching as well as frightening. However, because abuse tends to escalate, it is what you MUST do. Your and your child's safety could depend on it. It is shameful that your family isn't supportive, but don't let that stop you. Relocate if you must.

You need to form an escape plan. The way to do that is to call the National Domestic Violence Hotline. The phone number is 800-799-7233. Counselors there can refer you to help in your area -- they have done this for other Canadian women. They also offer education and empowerment programs so that victims will be less likely to be sweet-talked by their abusers into returning for more punishment.

Don't wait to reach out because your son's physical and emotional health depend on it. If not for yourself, do it for him.

DEAR ABBY: I have a friend who lives a few states away. We talk on the phone every week. Either she calls me or I call her. Every time she calls me, it's when she is driving somewhere. As soon as she arrives at her destination or pulls up in her driveway, she says, "I'm home (here) now. Gotta go!" and hangs up.

This has been going on for years. I stay on the phone all the time she rambles on and never cut her short. It's really starting to get to me. What should I do? -- FUMING IN FLORIDA

DEAR FUMING: If this has been happening "for years" and you are just now writing me about it, I'd call that one slow burn. Pick up the phone, call your friend and tell her exactly how you feel about it. If you don't, she'll continue doing what she has been doing because she thinks it's all right with you.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a young professional female with a military background. I'm well-educated and have a great job. However, I am also tattooed. The design is a tasteful full sleeve, with some work on my chest and other arm.

I will be attending a black tie affair for my boyfriend's company and am wondering what attire would be appropriate for such an event. I'm not ashamed of my art, and I have no issue with baring my arms, but would this be acceptable in this circumstance? -- FOREVER COVERED

DEAR FOREVER COVERED: I'm glad you asked, because it depends upon what kind of company your boyfriend works for. If it's creative, then to display your body art would not be shocking. However, if the company culture is conservative, it might attract unwelcome attention, and I don't recommend it.

DEAR ABBY: I have been intimately involved with another woman. Our relationship has been great for the past eight months. There is an immense amount of love and caring for each other. Although we have been together, we do not currently live together.

My problem is she's still living with her ex-husband. They have been separated for 12 years, but circumstances have brought them back into the same residence. I don't have an issue with their "roommate" situation. I have been to their home, have stayed the night and I'm OK with their arrangement.

What I DO take issue with is him introducing himself as her husband. Since I heard him do that, I have been in an uncomfortable state. Am I wrong for feeling this way, or is she wrong for allowing it to happen? -- SEETHING IN SACRAMENTO

DEAR SEETHING: Whether this couple has been separated for 12 years or not, they are still legally married. He IS her husband. You may be feeling uncomfortable because you feel like you may be involved in a triangle, and from where I sit, it may be true. It's time to have a frank conversation with your partner to clarify exactly what your role is.

DEAR ABBY: I have been trying to plan my son and future daughter-in-law's rehearsal dinner. The bride originally told me a local pizza place would be fine for the dinner. I insisted that I would like something "nicer," and she said it was up to me.

I have found a place within budget, but have just learned that the bridal shower is being catered by the same place. Is it acceptable for me to have the rehearsal at the same place?

We live in a town with relatively limited options, and there are other important festivities going on that day that limit my options further. Holding the rehearsal dinner at my house would be too stressful. Would it be OK to have it at the same restaurant, but serve different food? -- FUTURE MOTHER-IN-LAW

DEAR FUTURE MOTHER-IN-LAW: Absolutely! And congratulations on the forthcoming happy event.

DEAR ABBY: I'm the happily married mother of two teenage boys. The other day I overheard my older son (age 17) talking with a friend about "twerking." I have never heard of it and now I'm worried. Is twerking a drug term? Is it similar to "tripping," "getting high" or "catfishing"?

My 17-year-old is supposed to go to Princeton next year on a sports scholarship, and I'm afraid "twerking" will derail him from his charted path. Thank you for any advice you may have. -- TROUBLED MOM IN CONNECTICUT

DEAR MOM: Don't panic. "Tripping" and "getting high," as you already know, refer to altered states of consciousness as the result of using drugs. "Catfishing" is something else. It's pretending to be someone you aren't, creating a false identity on social media, usually to pursue a deceptive online romance.

The "twerking" your son was referring to is a dance move recently made famous by Miley Cyrus -- in which the dancer (usually female) gyrates in a provocative, semi-squatting position that involves thrusting hip movements.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are not big fans of his best friend's wife. "Aracely" is extremely ill-mannered. She never says thank you, didn't even write thank-you notes for their wedding and baby showers, and when we're at a restaurant will loudly announce that the food was "disgusting."

Aracely claims our baby "cries too much." She arrived at my son's second birthday party with a hangover and so much more. She claims she doesn't observe our "Southern ways" because she comes from South America and has been in the United States for only eight years.

We keep our interactions with her limited, but do not cut her off completely because my husband values his friendship with her husband. I told my husband I'm considering giving her an etiquette book, but he said it would be rude. I disagree. I think it would nullify Aracely's argument that she doesn't understand our "Southern" manners. Do you agree that it would be rude? -- MANNERED SOUTHERN GAL

DEAR SOUTHERN GAL: Sorry, but I do agree, because the gift would be given with malicious intent, and I'm pretty sure that while Aracely lacks polish, she isn't stupid.

Her problem isn't that she doesn't understand good manners because she's from South America. I have met individuals from South America who are educated, cultured and whose manners are refined. Obviously, Aracely does not come from this kind of background.

ONLY if you could pull it off without sounding catty, the next time she hauls out the excuse for her deplorable manners, you might "offer" to buy her an etiquette book "so she can learn the ways of her adopted country" -- but don't expect her to take you up on it.

DEAR ABBY: Would it be appropriate to send my future mother-in-law a Mother's Day card? I feel it would be a nice gesture to help start the relationship between us. -- NICK IN OMAHA

DEAR NICK: I concur. In fact, I suspect it will melt her heart to know you feel that way about her, even before you marry her daughter.