DEAR ABBY: Before my husband and I were married, I became pregnant with his baby. We decided together that we weren't ready for the responsibility and made the mutual decision to end the pregnancy early in the first trimester. We did marry eventually and had a baby girl a few years ago who is now in college.

My ex and I divorced many years ago because of his many affairs, including one with his best friend's wife. I have come to believe that my ex told our daughter about our decision out of spite because I told her about the affairs when she was old enough to understand since she may have a half-sister.

Should I ask my daughter about this or let it go? It was a very private decision, and I think he is a creep for hurting her by telling her. -- FURIOUS IN ILLINOIS

DEAR FURIOUS: Why do you think your ex spilled the beans to your daughter? Has she been behaving differently toward you? Why do you think she "may" have a half-sister? Are you sure it isn't more than one -- or a brother or two? The fact that you aborted a child before your daughter's birth has nothing to do with her. If you think there is something festering between you and your daughter, my advice is to clear the air before it gets worse.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I have been together since August 2012 and have lived together since last summer. He is perfect in every way. He wakes me every morning with a smile and a kiss and pours me a cup of tea. He never goes anywhere without letting me know he thinks I'm beautiful and telling me how much he loves me.

He gets home before I do most nights, has a glass of wine and a hot bath waiting for me, and cooks dinner while I'm in the tub. He's amazing! The only problem is, I was with sooo many of the wrong men for years, I have forgotten how to spoil a man in return.

I want him to know how much I appreciate and love him, but I don't know how. I just want him to know he's the one I want to sit on the porch with one day, watching our grandchildren play. I don't want to lose him because he thinks I don't appreciate all he does. Please help. -- KNOWS A GOOD THING IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR KNOWS: When your boyfriend does something for you, thank him for it. Tell him you love him and give him affection in abundance. Express how fortunate you feel to have him in your life. Look for things you can do that will make his life easier, and put forth an effort to reciprocate the many thoughtful things he does for you. Every man is different, but this would be a good start in getting your message across.

DEAR ABBY: Is it too late for me to go back to school and get a degree and pursue a career I would enjoy? I'm 53, married and the mother of two children, 19 and 23. I didn't finish college, and I don't know what to do with my life. The only jobs I have ever had were as a retail salesperson.

With one child just out of college, I am unsure if I could even afford to continue my education. Where would I go to find answers about returning to school at my age, choosing a major and finding the money to pay for it? Any advice would be appreciated. -- TOO OLD 4 NEW TRICKS?

DEAR TOO OLD?: Contact the nearest university or college and ask if it offers career counseling and aptitude testing to determine what you would need to complete your education and find a career you'd be suited for. Many schools offer this service. As to your being too late to do this at 53 -- it's never too late. People in their 90s have earned degrees and been enriched by it, and so can you.

DEAR ABBY: My nephew is getting married next year. I was very excited because I love him and I'm a baker. I had planned on making the groom's cake as I did for his brother's and sister's weddings. The problem is, they have decided on a hunting theme for their wedding -- including a camouflage wedding dress for the bride.

Abby, I am an animal-rights activist. I'm against any form of hunting. I am also involved with several animal-protection groups. My nephew and his fiancee know how hard I work for animal rights -- just the thought of a hunting theme for a wedding makes me ill.

I don't even want to attend, let alone make a cake. What can I do so there will be no hurt feelings if I don't want to attend or participate? -- BAKER IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR BAKER: The theme for your nephew's wedding is certainly unique. The concept of a camouflage wedding dress is practical because the dress can be worn after the nuptials, which isn't the case with many bridal gowns.

Feeling as strongly as you do about not attending, write the happy couple a warm letter wishing them a lifetime of happiness together and include a nice wedding gift -- I'm sure there will be no hurt feelings.

DEAR ABBY: My elderly in-laws are wonderful, but even with hearing aids, they have trouble hearing. They enjoy dining out often. In order for them to hear us, family and friends must speak louder than normal. In a restaurant, this can be uncomfortable, not only for those of us dining with them, but also for any other people seated nearby.

My in-laws like to ask about and discuss personal and medical matters, and very loudly. If we try to keep our conversation at a reasonable and polite level, they get upset for not being included in the conversation or constantly ask, "What'd he say?"

I feel bad for other diners seated near us who are trying to have a nice meal. What to do? -- MORTIFIED AT THE DINNER TABLE

DEAR MORTIFIED: With some of the commercials that air on television these days, from overactive bladder to hemorrhoids to erectile dysfunction and adult diapers, it's hard to believe anyone would be shocked by what's discussed at your table.

However, if possible, ask that your party be seated in a section of the restaurant away from other patrons. If it's not, turn to diners who are overhearing the "organ recital" and say, "They're actually whispering, even though it doesn't sound like it!"

DEAR ABBY: My husband, and I are getting ready to close on our first home. Our mortgage broker was an absolute angel, teaching us about the process and making sure we were well-informed.

Because he was so wonderful, we were thinking about getting him a thank-you card and a gift card to a restaurant. We're unsure about the etiquette regarding thank-yous to mortgage brokers and aren't sure how to proceed. Please advise. -- FIRST-TIME HOMEBUYERS

DEAR HOMEBUYERS: The same rules of etiquette apply that would apply to any gift. I'm sure your "angel" will not only be pleased by your generosity and grateful for your thoughtfulness, but also pleasantly surprised.

DEAR ABBY: I have been single for five years. I recently reconnected with a man I lost contact with 13 years ago. We went out a few times and it was wonderful.

Out of curiosity, I began checking him out online, starting with his mother, who he had mentioned was a surgeon. When I could find no information on her, I started looking up other things. Abby, I could find nothing about him or his family. His mother does not have a medical license, and there are no property records or any record of a marriage license to his second wife.

When I confronted him, he was furious and accused me of not trusting him. Now he doesn't want anything to do with me. I'm heartbroken. I loved him years ago and thought this was for real.

I feel guilty for not trusting him, even though I know he hasn't been honest with me. Is it wrong to do background checks on people you date? -- DATING A MAN WHO DOESN'T EXIST

DEAR DATING: It isn't wrong to do some checking. In fact, these days it's very common. But I wonder, having known this man years ago, what made you curious enough to double-check? Also, how good are you at research? And when you "confronted" him, were you hostile, which would have made him react defensively?

Please do not waste another minute feeling guilty about this. If he isn't the person he portrayed himself to be, you may have dodged a bullet.

DEAR ABBY: My 7-year-old son is a great winner when we play games, but he's a terrible loser. When he loses a game, he loses control. He screams, yells, hits and sometimes bites. Is there a way to stop this behavior or am I stuck with a son who hates to lose? -- LOSING THE BATTLE AT HOME

DEAR LOSING THE BATTLE: You have described a child who is unable to handle frustration or control his emotions. When a child is 2 or 3, this kind of behavior is understandable. But by age 7, your son should have learned to manage his frustration more appropriately.

If his poor sportsmanship continues, it will cause problems with his peers. You should discuss this with him while he is rational, BEFORE you play any games with him. Explain that games are supposed to be fun, and "when we lose, we are given the chance to learn from our mistake." The same is true in sports. Athletes use their mistakes to improve their skills.

It might also be helpful to impose consequences when your son acts out. But if that doesn't help him, then you should have him evaluated physically and neurologically to make sure there is nothing medically wrong with him.

DEAR ABBY: I'm an 11-year-old girl, and my mom has a boyfriend who lives with us. Mom said that he comes first in her life. When she told me that, I felt like she didn't love me anymore. He tries to be my father, acts like he owns the house and gets me in deep trouble. I have considered moving in with my dad. What should I do? -- PRETEEN IN FLORIDA

DEAR PRETEEN: Now that your mother has made her priorities clear, I think it is time you discussed this with your father. If he is willing and able to take care of you, you might be better off living with him.