DEAR ABBY: My wife and I run a restaurant in a small town. Recently, my wife came home on my day off and told me that during the lunch hour, one of our servers had come into the kitchen and announced that they'd need extra sanitizer on table 29 because a mother was changing her baby on it!

What has happened in our society that people don't understand that this is unsanitary and rude? Had I been there, I don't know that I could have kept a civil tongue, and I feel like people today regard my disgust as unreasonable. Is there something I'm missing here? -- CAFE CRAZY

DEAR "CRAZY": I don't know who you have been talking to, but your disgust is not "unreasonable." What that mother was missing was common sense and courtesy for those around her. I agree that changing a baby on a restaurant table was out of the ballpark -- particularly if a changing table was available in the women's restroom of your cafe. (I'm assuming there is one, but if there isn't, the situation should be immediately rectified.)

DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Gene," and I were married for five years until our divorce six months ago. We still live together and are dating each other. We had so many issues, I felt there needed to be a fresh start, including filing for divorce and living apart.

Now that we have started over, moved away from our hometown and gotten rid of several "friends," our issues are gone and we're financially stable. In fact, our relationship is better than ever.

Since things are now worked out, I'd like us to get remarried. I told him before our divorce that I hoped we could resolve things and marry again. Now he's not sure, because he says if we got divorced again, he couldn't bear the hurt. He says he still doesn't understand why our "fresh start" included a divorce.

Abby, we love each other. We want to be together forever and have children. I don't want to be dating my ex-husband indefinitely. Do you have advice for us? -- GOING NOWHERE IN WASHINGTON

DEAR GOING NOWHERE: I sure do. In the interest of solidifying your fresh start, you and Gene should sign up for some premarital counseling. If you do, you may be able to help him understand why you felt the way you did. With counseling, you can sure that your problems are fully resolved, and it may reassure him that this time there won't be another divorce. If you are thinking about a religious ceremony, the officiant may even require it.

DEAR ABBY: My sister and mother went to a movie recently. My sister became concerned that her husband and kids were locked out of the house, so she quickly took out her phone and texted her husband. It took less than 30 seconds.

A minute later a large man came down the stairs of the theater, got right in her face and began berating her -- telling her she was rude for pulling out her phone. It was so upsetting that she and Mom got up and left.

I understand that she should have stepped out of the theater to text. However, the man caused more of a scene than her texting did. What makes people think it is OK to treat people badly? -- HOLLY IN KOKOMO

DEAR HOLLY: The same thing that made your sister think it was OK to use her cellphone in a darkened theater. She's lucky that all she got was a lecture because these days many people have short fuses.

DEAR ABBY: I cut my father out of my life years ago, after he declared he could not support my decision to adopt three children from a Russian orphanage with my longtime companion. The adoption announcement coincided with my "coming out" to Dad, who is now married to his third wife.

It must have been a lot for him to take in at one time. He told me plainly that he could not support my decision because he could not "understand" it. He has never met our children, and does not acknowledge them as his grandchildren.

This year on Father's Day, I sent him a card and he replied by email that he was glad to hear from me and he hoped for a reconciliation, but was not sure how to go about it. I responded by email that I was cautiously optimistic that we could reignite a respectful relationship.

I haven't heard back from him and I suspect it's because he saw that I had changed my last name from his to my husband's, a decision I made after our marriage. My father was not aware that I had gotten married. I think I have overwhelmed him again, which has rendered him speechless. Please advise me on how to proceed. -- PRODIGAL SON IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR SON: Call your father, tell him you love him and that you would like to schedule a visit with him -- but would like to send him some reading material before you do. Then contact PFLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays). The phone number is 202-467-8180 and you'll find them on the Internet at www.pflag.org. They will be happy to provide you with literature for your dad to help him "understand." Frankly, he has my sympathy because before you hit him with the "double whammy," he didn't have a clue about who you really are.

Whether your name change overwhelmed him or not is irrelevant. The ball is now in your court, so if you want to have a hope of a relationship with your father, you will have to make the next move.

DEAR ABBY: Two years ago, I proposed to the woman who changed me for the better. I love her with all my heart, but after we had been engaged for only four days everything came to a stop. Her mother was against the marriage, and my fiancee wasn't strong enough to follow her heart. We had been in a relationship for more than nine years, most of it long distance except for the last two years.

I couldn't understand her change of heart, and I tried with all my might to find some middle ground. "Claudette" has three children from her first marriage, and I had become a part of their lives and an important family friend.

After getting no reason for calling off the wedding, I began texting her for an answer only to be arrested for cyber-stalking. I know in my heart from letters sent back and forth that this wasn't Claudette's idea, but I can't let go. I know she's the one for me. We made a great couple, but her mother couldn't stand the fact that we were so close. How do I let her go? -- GRIEVING IN FLORIDA

DEAR GRIEVING: You may not believe this, but you're a lucky man. It may take the help of a psychologist for you to disengage emotionally and move on. Given that you wound up in trouble with the law, this would be a wise decision.

It might also help to envision what it would have been like being married not only to Claudette, but also to her mother -- because they appear to be joined at the hip, and the part that's doing the thinking isn't your former fiancee. This may be the reason that her first marriage failed.

DEAR ABBY: After years of denial I have come to realize that I am bisexual. I'm happily married to a straight man, and we have a great marriage I wouldn't change for the world. He is my soul mate, and we plan to be together for many years to come. I just happen to be physically attracted to women, too.

Some people say I can't be bisexual if I've never been with a woman; I say they're wrong. Am I correct?

How do I deal with this in social situations? I'm afraid to put it on my social media profile for fear of a backlash from my family. I'd like my friends to know, but it doesn't feel proper to just come out and say, "I'm bi."

I was hoping some of your readers might be able to give me some input. How does one "come out" without overdoing it or coming across the wrong way? Is there a right way? Should I continue keeping it a secret?

I'm not sure what to do with my revelation. I have pondered it for some time now, and felt I could trust you to give me tactful, unbiased advice. -- BI IN THE DEEP SOUTH

DEAR B.I.T.D.S.: Bisexuality is having an attraction to people of both sexes, and yes, it is possible to be bisexual without having acted upon it.

However, being married means you are (happily) involved in a monogamous relationship. To announce that you are bisexual and/or put it on the Internet would be a mistake, in my opinion, not only because it would shock your family, but also because it might seem like you were advertising that you are "available." Unless you are promiscuous, you are not available. Most married people agree to be committed to their spouses regardless of whether they are straight, gay or bi.

If you choose to confide your diverse sexual orientation to your close friends, that is your business. But if you do, please remember that once two people know something, there's a strong likelihood of the news spreading faster than the flu.

P.S. If you do decide to divulge, be sure to tell your husband first.

DEAR ABBY: I work in a jewelry store where the associates get generous discounts. I mentioned the amount of my discount at one family party, and ever since, my brother-in-law has continued to ask to use it for my sister.

Abby, letting others use my discount is strictly forbidden. Although the store may never find out, this goes against my morals.

My sister's birthday is in six weeks, and today I told him we can split the cost for the item she wants. I offered because I felt pressured. I have now decided that I can't go against my morals, plus the item is pretty expensive even with my discount.

How do I tell him no? I have told him before that it's against company policy, but the message isn't getting through. -- FEELING USED IN GEORGIA

DEAR FEELING USED: Tell your brother-in-law that even with the discount, splitting the cost of the birthday gift is too much for you. Then reiterate firmly that doing this is against company policy and could cost you your job. It's the truth.

While the conversation may not be pleasant, it's important to deliver the message now so he can make other arrangements to pay for that expensive piece of jewelry your sister is expecting.