DEAR ABBY: The other day at my in-laws', my mother-in-law, father-in-law, "Bert," and I were in their computer room. Bert has pictures of his family posted on his bulletin board and we often look at them when we're in the room.

One of the photos he posted recently I found disturbing. It was of a young, well-endowed woman in her early 20s wearing a tight tube top. What disturbed me was that Bert has printed my 16-year-old daughter's name underneath and the date "2017." When I asked him about it, he said that was what she will look like at 21. My mother-in-law said she thought it was crude, and I think it's unnerving for a grandfather to be picturing his only granddaughter in such a manner.

We have a great family life and I wouldn't want that to end over a picture, but I don't want to look at it, and I don't think this is behavior that's expected from a man in his 60s.

How should I broach the subject that the photo needs to come down? -- CONCERNED FATHER FROM GREAT LAKES

DEAR CONCERNED FATHER: Grandpa "Bert" appears to be a dirty old man. I'm not sure "you" should talk to him about this. It would have more impact if you, your wife and your mother-in-law do it together. When you do, tell him that putting your daughter's name under the picture was in poor taste and you all want the picture with your daughter's name shredded. (That way you're sure it's gone.)

Privately, your wife should ask your daughter if Grandpa Bert has ever done anything that made her uncomfortable. If the answer is yes, confront him. If not, explain your concerns to your daughter, tell her you and your wife love her, and she can always come to you with any concerns of her own.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a young mother who dropped out of high school because I didn't have enough credits. I started a great job in fast food and have a very understanding boss. I met my boyfriend at work. We've lived together since before my son was born and he has helped me to raise my boy. (His biological dad left me and has had no contact since I was two months pregnant.)

Lately I have been incredibly depressed. I'm nowhere I wanted to be in life, miserable in my relationship and have started to hate my job. I'm clinically diagnosed as bipolar and on medication. I have also been seeing a therapist since I was very young. I don't know what to do. I don't want to throw my life away. I love my son and want the best for him. Any advice on how to pick myself up? -- DOWN DEEP IN CLEVELAND

DEAR DOWN DEEP: Yes. Tell your therapist that you are cycling into a depression. Your medications may need to be adjusted. Next, explore completing your high school education by getting a GED degree, which may widen your employment opportunities. Once you're feeling better, you should consider whether you want to end the romantic relationship you have with your boyfriend. When your emotions are on an even keel, you'll be better able to make that decision.

P.S. If you're not receiving child support, contact the department of social services in your state, because your child's father should have been contributing regularly.

DEAR ABBY: When filling salt and pepper shakers that aren't marked, does the salt go into the one with the fewer holes on the top? -- PLEASE PASS THE SALT

DEAR PLEASE PASS THE SALT: There is no set rule. Although traditionally the salt shaker is the one with more holes, because doctors now advise Americans to cut back on our salt intake, it might make more sense to put it into the shaker with fewer holes.

DEAR ABBY: What percentage of women's problems do you think could be avoided if, for the first year after beginning to date someone, they were to use birth control and not marry? Many of the women who write to you seem to be shocked that the men they're with do not have sterling characters. But I have never dated anyone who could hide his true colors longer than six months. I'm sure the same is true of women, too.

Much of your advice to these ladies entails seeking counseling or an attorney, but to the millions of women who haven't yet made this mistake, how about a shout-out for prevention? The heart is ungovernable, but people do have absolute power to use birth control and avoid rushing into marriage. -- SUSAN IN ARIZONA

DEAR SUSAN: Sometimes people marry before they really know themselves, let alone their partner. But I'm all for giving that shout-out for prevention of unplanned pregnancies. According to the Guttmacher Institute, 49 percent of the 6.7 million pregnancies each year fall into this category. While some result from carelessness or mistakes in using birth control, others stem from lack of assertiveness on the part of women because they are economically dependent or lack the self-esteem to insist their partner use a condom.

Your comment about rushing into marriage until you really know someone reminds me of the saying, "Act in haste, repent at leisure." Perhaps it should be amended to, "Act in haste, repent, repent, repent."

DEAR ABBY: I once read in your column a list of physical activities and how many calories are burned while performing each one. You included sexual relations. Would you please list those activities and the calories burned for each? Thanks! -- LOOKING TO LOSE

DEAR LOOKING: You didn't see it in my column, but here is the estimated number of calories burned per hour for several types of measured physical activity: slow walking, 115 to 200; dancing, 275 to 350; skating or swimming, 300 to 600; tennis, 350 to 700; gardening, 250 to 300; golfing (18 holes), 150 to 225.

There are no reliable figures on the number of calories burned during sex because the amount of exertion varies with the individual.

DEAR ABBY: With the holidays coming, I'd like to suggest something your readers can do with all the free address labels they will be receiving from charities.

Many of my elderly relatives have poor handwriting that has led to undeliverable mail from them to me. So I started taking those labels and giving them out to my relatives. They now use them to address letters to me.

At the time I told them I was sending the labels because they showed my "official address," the one the post office is most likely to recognize. I haven't had any undelivered mail since, and my relatives like it so much that several have started sending me their labels, too.

This obviously doesn't solve the problem of getting the labels in the first place, but it does provide a way to put them to use instead of throwing them out. -- E.B. IN HERNDON, VA.

DEAR E.B.: For anyone who corresponds with a relative who has fading vision or a tremor, that's a good suggestion. Thank you for offering it.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 20-year-old female with five younger brothers and sisters. My 18-year-old sister is my biological sister, while my youngest four siblings are adopted.

At the beginning of the year I discovered my 14-year-old brother has been peeping on my sister. When my parents found out, they sent him to counseling, but my sister is still pretty scarred from it.

Today, when I was in the bathroom, I realized my brother was peeping at me through a hole in the wall. I feel extremely violated, but because he is only 14, I don't know what to do. How can we get him to stop, and how can my sister and I feel comfortable in our house again? -- SCARED OF MY BROTHER THE PEEPER

DEAR SCARED: You and your sister should be able to feel comfortable in your own home. Tell your parents that the counseling your brother received hasn't worked, then show them the hole he has been peeping through. Clearly, whatever consequences there were for his actions the first time were not enough to discourage his behavior. Your sister may need counseling to get beyond it.

The hole should be repaired -- and until it is, tape a small mirror over it so that if he tries to peep again, all he will see is his own eyeball. And tell your sister to do the same.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend, "Carl," and I have been together for six months. We're both 29. We live together, work for the same employer and each have one child.

My problem is, we argue constantly. We fight about the kids, money, chores, etc. The smallest thing can turn into a major battle. Do you think it's too early to be fighting so much? I feel obligated to make it work because my son's father and I broke up before he was born, and he has now become attached to Carl and his daughter. Please help! -- TORN IN TORRANCE, CALIF.

DEAR TORN: Yes, it's too early to be fighting this way. It was also way too early to start living together. Couples counseling may help you and Carl resolve your issues -- but only if he is willing to work on them as you are. If that isn't the case, you should move on quickly, before your son forms an even stronger attachment. At this point, it can be done without the expense of a lawyer.

DEAR ABBY: My mom pays me $3 a week to do chores around the house. I take out the garbage, do the dishes, vacuum and set the table every night. I'm frustrated that I'm being paid such a small amount for doing a ton of work.

I told her I'm on "strike" and I'm tired of being her slave. Whenever I mention getting a raise, she claims she'll talk to my dad about it -- but she never does! How do I get paid more? -- SINCERELY, LAUREN

DEAR LAUREN: If your father is the source of the money, then don't depend on your mother to intercede for you. Talk to him yourself. And when you do, be prepared to tell him what a good job you have been doing -- and that you would be willing to take on a few more responsibilities for a little more compensation. Consider it your first lesson in the art of negotiation.