DEAR ABBY: I have been married for 10 years. Early in our marriage my husband talked about wanting to try swinging. We did, and had many enjoyable experiences.

Two years ago he decided he no longer wanted to be in the lifestyle, so we stopped. The problem is, I miss it very much. I want to get back into it and have talked with him about it, but he insists we stay out of it. I am torn between going to parties behind his back, suffering my displeasure in silence because I'm not able to do something I really enjoyed, or divorcing. Can you help me figure this out? -- FOXY IN PHOENIX

DEAR FOXY: Let's review your options as a process of elimination. I don't recommend that you do anything behind your husband's back because, at some point, what you're doing is sure to come out. I also do not recommend suffering in silence because sooner or later your unhappiness will become apparent.

That leaves the option of divorce. Because you and your husband no longer see eye to eye on the issue of marital fidelity and he wants a wife who will "cleave" unto him only, it makes sense to go your separate ways so both of your needs can be met.

DEAR ABBY: The other day when I went jogging, I met a guy just as I stopped to take a water break. He started flirting and I was too tired to tell him to leave, so I decided to humor him until I cooled down enough to resume my jog.

He asked me basic questions trying to get to know me, and when I told him I was a college student, he asked for my GPA. When I told him it was none of his business, he laughed and asked what my problem was. He said no one else had complained when he asked, and he didn't mean to pry. I still felt he was being rude, so I said goodbye and jogged off before he could say anything.

Abby, I wasn't trying to hide a low GPA, but I don't think it's something to tell people in a first meeting. Is it normal for people to ask others what their GPA is -- especially if they just met? -- CO-ED IN BOSTON

DEAR CO-ED: When someone says he or she is a student, the question that usually follows is, "Where are you studying?" or "What's your major?" It's not, "What's your GPA?" which seems like a not-so-subtle way of asking whether you're a good student or not. His attempt to make conversation was clumsy -- and because he said the question is one he asks routinely, let's hope he learns from his encounter with you and scratches it off his list of pickup lines.

DEAR ABBY: I have an issue I'd like your opinion on. What should the Tooth Fairy do with baby teeth after collecting them? She stopped coming to our house years ago, but the baby teeth have been dutifully saved -- every one of them -- in a jar where the Tooth Fairy left them.

I thought I was unique in this predicament, but found out that a sister-in-law had the same dilemma. Our kids are adults now, but I don't know what I should or could do with these little keepsakes of a beautiful boy who stole my heart the minute I looked into his eyes. -- ALWAYS HIS MOM

DEAR MOM: Let's see ... You could have them mounted and display them on a charm bracelet. You could offer to sell them back to your son. Or, you could place them in an envelope and put them in a box with the curl from his first haircut and a pair of his baby shoes. One day I'm sure he'll be touched.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a single guy, 33 years old. I am 6 feet 9 inches tall, and defined as husky. I only need to enter a room and it gets quiet followed by a "funny" comment about my size. I smile and laugh to put people at ease. Then I'm forgotten, a gentle giant who is called on only when people want something.

I'm sorry to say women either want nothing to do with me, or something to do with my wallet. I don't enjoy spending my life alone looked at like a freak of nature. But morning comes and I carry on in pain while wearing a smile.

I keep hoping to find that special someone who would hold me and tell me it is going to be OK. It would be nice to smile because I'm happy instead of doing it to hide pain. Do you think it will happen someday? Maybe? -- HURTS TO SMILE

DEAR HURTS: Yes, I do, and I'd like to suggest two things you can do to make it happen. The first is to contact a group called Tall Clubs International. It's a not-for-profit social organization for tall adults (men must be at least 6 feet 2 inches and women at least 5 feet 10 inches) that was founded in the late 1930s. It provides members with social activities and travel to cities around the U.S. and Canada for gatherings. The toll-free phone number is 888-468-2552 and the website is www.tall.org. Through this group you can meet people with whom you see eye to eye.

I would also suggest that you talk about your self-esteem issues and sadness with a licensed mental health professional. You are not a "freak" -- you're a big guy with a big heart and the same need to feel accepted and wanted as everyone else.

P.S. If you repeatedly encounter women who are only after your wallet, then you're hanging around with the wrong crowd.

DEAR ABBY: I am a middle-aged woman in a five-year relationship with another woman. My girlfriend lives in another city and shares her home with her 30-year-old son.

During a conversation recently, she mentioned that her son massages her feet at night. I often massage her feet, and I know that foot rubs are sensual and somewhat intimate. I feel it is inappropriate for her adult son to be doing this. What do you think? -- BEFUDDLED IN FLORIDA

DEAR BEFUDDLED: I think it depends upon who is doing the rubbing and the circumstances. When someone gets a foot rub from a lover or a spouse, it can be a form of foreplay. When it's done during a pedicure, it's not. I seriously doubt the woman gets turned on when her son massages her tootsies, so forget about it!

DEAR ABBY: I am a middle-aged woman in a five-year relationship with another woman. My girlfriend lives in another city and shares her home with her 30-year-old son.

During a conversation recently, she mentioned that her son massages her feet at night. I often massage her feet, and I know that foot rubs are sensual and somewhat intimate. I feel it is inappropriate for her adult son to be doing this. What do you think? -- BEFUDDLED IN FLORIDA

DEAR BEFUDDLED: I think it depends upon who is doing the rubbing and the circumstances. When someone gets a foot rub from a lover or a spouse, it can be a form of foreplay. When it's done during a pedicure, it's not. I seriously doubt the woman gets turned on when her son massages her tootsies, so forget about it!

TO MY JEWISH READERS: Sundown marks the beginning of Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. During this 24-hour period, observant Jewish people fast, engage in reflection and prayer, and formally repent for any sin that might have been committed during the previous Hebrew year. To all of you -- may your fast be an easy one.

DEAR ABBY: I am very concerned for my henpecked son who is expecting his first child. He works long hours (50-plus a week) at a low-paying job with an hour commute. His wife works part-time (10 hours a week). The problem is, their tiny apartment is a pigsty, and she doesn't clean or pick up. She expects him to do it all, and he tries to, while she reads and makes baby quilts.

How do I tactfully get her to do her share now, before the baby comes and she expects my son to "help her" even more? He is totally overburdened, stressed out, but seemingly happy. Until I saw the condition of their apartment I had suspected it was bad, but had no idea how bad the situation really was. -- DESPAIRING MOM IN CONNECTICUT

DEAR DESPAIRING MOM: Not knowing your daughter-in-law, I can't judge whether she is lazy, or whether the reason she isn't doing more around the apartment is pregnancy-related. You say your son is happy. Be grateful for that. Rather than "tactfully getting her to do her share," why not volunteer to help them until your grandchild is on a regular sleep schedule? It would make you appear to be an angel instead of critical, and bring the three of you a lot closer than you appear to be. However, if your offer is refused, then accept that this is how your son and daughter-in-law prefer to live.

DEAR ABBY: I spent tonight in a parking lot, knowing I had no options. My husband of 25 years is an alcoholic and abusive. I have two teenage children at home. I'm in bad health and haven't worked in decades. I'm trapped.

I have the typical arguments with my daughter. My son is a gem who stays home because he doesn't want to leave us with his father. It's a sad situation.

While catching up on reading Dear Abby tonight, I saw a number for an abuse hotline where they will help me with a plan to leave. I have no money, no chance of getting a job. But that number gave me a glimmer of hope. It seems too good to be true, but I'll make that call. Thank you, Abby. -- BEATEN DOWN IN TEXAS

DEAR BEATEN DOWN: I'm glad you are making that call to the National Domestic Violence Hotline. Part of the reason you feel so hopeless and "beaten down" is that for so many years your abuser chipped away at your self-esteem.

For any other reader who may have missed that column and needs the toll-free phone number, it is 800-799-7233.

DEAR ABBY: My good friend "Claire" has two daughters, 8 and 10. Her younger daughter is the same age as my daughter and they are very close. We spend a lot of time with them and have the girls at our house often.

After the last sleepover, my daughter commented that the sisters argue all the time and it's not fun having them over anymore. She would like to invite only the younger daughter for a sleepover, but we have put off asking as we are afraid of hurting the older daughter's feelings by not including her. Actually, I'm afraid it might hurt the mother's feelings, too. What's the best way to invite only one sibling? -- SLEEPOVER NIGHTMARE

DEAR S.N.: If the girls are arguing when they're at your house, you can bet it's happening at home, too. Talk to Claire and explain what happened and your daughter's reaction. The older girl should be interacting/socializing with friends of her own.