DEAR ABBY: When I married my husband, "Mason," 30 years ago, I was the only girl he could get. He was a great catch by my standards -- and still is. But back then nobody else wanted him but me, which was fine with me. I don't like competition.

We have had a great life together up until the last 10 years or so. Mason is aging gracefully, and there's something about him now that every woman is suddenly interested in. They all treat him like he's a new toy. They fawn over him and I become invisible.

We don't get out much, and I used to think I wanted to go out more -- but now I just want to stay home and hide my husband inside. The real problem is, Mason loves the attention. It could be what he always wanted. I don't know how to handle this without getting my feelings hurt, pouting and being incredibly jealous. He gives me no reason to think he'll be unfaithful, but I can't help but worry. Help! -- WIFE OF A LATE BLOOMER

DEAR WIFE: Congratulations. You are now a member of a "club" comprised of spouses living in the shadows of actors, politicians, moguls, etc. However, your self-esteem issues could create real problems for you and your husband if you don't learn to deal with them.

You weren't the "only woman Mason could get" -- you're the woman Mason chose to spend his life with. The sooner you accept that, the better off both of you will be. If you can't do it on your own, counseling could help because hiding is not the answer.

DEAR ABBY; My son and daughter-in-law live like pigs. Neither one of them was raised that way. They live in a beautiful home that literally smells like a litter box. I would look the other way or not visit, but now they have four children.

Not only are my grandchildren unkempt and dirty -- dirty clothes, smelly shoes, unwashed hair -- but my son and his wife foist their parenting duties off on their daughter, who's only 10. It's HER job to get her brothers up and bathed, changed, dressed and fed so Mom and Dad can sleep late. The poor girl is exhausted all the time. She doesn't always have the time to brush her own hair/teeth before school. She's often made fun of.

My son sees nothing wrong with these "chores," and I'm afraid to say anything because I know my daughter-in-law will cut me off from the kids. What's sad is my son allows it. Am I crazy? Please help. -- DESPERATE GRANDMA ON THE EAST COAST

DEAR DESPERATE GRANDMA: You're not crazy; you're a caring grandmother who can't stand seeing her grandchildren neglected. Now pick up the phone and call Childhelp. The toll-free number is 800-422-4453. The advocate who answers the call can give you information about agencies that can help, and your confidentiality will be protected.

DEAR ABBY: My father-in-law drops by our house nearly every weekend. He arrives so early that we're usually still in bed. He also rides a motorcycle that sounds like a jet engine and disturbs our neighbors.

I have asked my husband several times to talk to his dad about these early morning visits. He refuses to say anything. We have two kids who are 4 and 9 months. Sleep is something we cherish. What do I do? -- ANNOYED DAUGHTER-IN-LAW IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR DAUGHTER-IN-LAW: Because your husband refuses to stand up and explain to his father that he needs to come at a specific time -- like 11 o'clock -- that task now falls to you. Speak up!

DEAR ABBY: This letter is to offer sympathy to "Trish in Louisiana" (Sept. 25), who was seated next to two large passengers on a three-hour flight. It has happened to me.

The airlines control the size and weight of baggage, whether it's checked or carry-on, and charge when it's overweight. So why do they turn a blind eye when it comes to passengers who must endure being crowded out of the seats we have paid for? If airlines aren't willing to screen passengers for size, perhaps they should provide a few rows of larger seats to accommodate them.

Airlines have sacrificed comfort for economy to the point that the seats are simply too small. I'm an average-size woman, but I find the seats are barely large enough. They're crowded so close together you can't move your legs, and they don't actually recline. I agree with your advice to speak up if you find yourself being squeezed. -- ELLEN IN LAS CRUCES

DEAR ELLEN: While your letter reflects the views of many readers, they all emphatically agree that airlines need to do a better job of customer service regarding the seating on passenger planes. My newspaper readers comment:

DEAR ABBY: As America grows larger, airline seats grow smaller. Trish was right to be compassionate. If airlines treat large people (who are also paying customers) like dirt so they can turn a profit by squeezing passengers into every inch of space, they are wrong.

There are ways to be creative and not humiliate anyone. The flight attendant could have moved a child to her seat with Mom across the aisle.

I recommend that flight attendants think along those lines, because having a gate attendant drag people off flights is not the best way to handle this and should only be a last resort. We're all customers, and we all deserve to be treated with dignity. -- MARY IN VIRGINIA BEACH, VA.

DEAR ABBY: The fault lies with airline management. They should specify up front in their ad campaigns that if the passengers' dimensions exceed certain parameters, they must buy two tickets. -- COMFORTABLE ON THE GROUND

DEAR ABBY: My heart goes out to all three. I am a plus-size woman and my husband is "normal" size. His field is marketing, and I showed him your letter. He said recent surveys have shown that one-third of people who refuse to fly do so because of the tight seating, and not fear of an accident. Airlines pack people in like sardines to make more money, and it is resented.

I quit flying years ago because of claustrophobia. If I had to fly now, I'd buy a first-class ticket. I wonder why the planes don't have six or eight seats in the back of coach that are larger and cost more money, but less than first class.

Something has to be done to make flying safer and more comfortable for everyone. Surely we have the intellectual capacity to solve these problems. -- NO LONGER A FREQUENT FLIER IN NEW YORK

DEAR ABBY: It's unfortunate that Trish didn't stick to her guns and continue with her complaint. I believe airlines should head these problems off at the gate. They have a box to check the size of carry-on luggage; they should also have a passenger seat to check the size of people. If someone doesn't fit, then that person must buy an additional ticket for a second seat. -- REFUSES TO BE SQUISHED

DEAR ABBY: I have heard of interventions for drug and alcohol addicts. Could I stage one for my daughter "Aileen's" addiction to texting on her cellphone and Facebook?

She and our grandson live with us because her marriage broke up. I am becoming the boy's default mother because Aileen is constantly texting or spending hours on Facebook. She'll say, "I have to send a quick message," then reappear an hour later. By then, we have fed our grandson and changed his diaper.

When I try to discuss this with her, she says her work requires this constant communication, but I know it doesn't. There have been times when Aileen's feelings have been hurt because her son doesn't want to go someplace with her and prefers to stay with us instead. I suspect that he feels ignored when he's with her because her thumb is constantly flying across her phone. How can we get her to understand how this might be making her child feel? -- FULLY PRESENT IN ARIZONA

DEAR FULLY PRESENT: You could and should stage an intervention with your daughter. Aileen is neglecting her son. It's a shame that before couples are allowed to conceive that they aren't forced to take parenting classes. The time she spends on Facebook and texting is time she should be interacting with him.

Because she is so easily distracted, you and her father should declare your home to be a digital-free zone unless your grandson is napping or in bed for the night. Consider making discussions with the boy's pediatrician -- and perhaps parenting classes -- a condition of her staying in your home. She won't like it, but it would be in your grandson's best interests.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a male in my 60s who has been active all my life and still try to be. However, I'm not dealing with the aging process very well. I have just been told that I'm going to lose my eyesight.

I have never been sick or hospitalized, no broken bones, no operations, ate right and consider myself in great health. But now I find myself taking naps a lot and not wanting to socialize very much. I have to force myself to do things.

I have always said one of these days it's going to start raining on me, and then it will be over. I don't like this attitude and I'm a great believer in faith. Any suggestions? -- MALE READER IN THE U.S.A.

DEAR MALE READER: I wish you had included your address and phone number because I would have contacted you personally. The first thing to do is get a second opinion regarding your vision loss. If the diagnosis is confirmed, there are devices available that can help some sight-impaired people. There are also programs to help you adjust to your vision loss and live an independent and full life. But you should start now.

Some of the symptoms you describe could be signs of depression. Please consult your physician about them. With counseling and medication, the "rain" in your life could be reduced to a drizzle you can handle. And hang onto your faith because it will serve you well.

DEAR ABBY: My husband brought me roses the day our divorce was final. We had been married almost 30 years. When I asked him why, he said, "Aren't you happy? Isn't this what you wanted?" HE was the one who initiated the divorce. What kind of man would do this? -- STUMPED IN FLORIDA

DEAR STUMPED: Someone who is angry or sadistic, or one who got his wires seriously crossed.