DEAR ABBY: My fiancee, "Vanessa," and I have been engaged almost a year. We're to be married in three months. When I popped the question, I took her to one of her favorite spots in the Smoky Mountains. When I proposed, she was overcome with emotion -- but not the kind I would have thought. She said yes, but she wasn't at all happy about being surprised. She doesn't like surprises.
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At the time, I was sure she had an inkling about my intentions. We had discussed becoming engaged several times. Now, as the wedding draws near, she wants me to "re-propose." It makes me feel like my first wasn't good enough, and it is really upsetting me. I only intended to do it once in my life. What would you recommend? -- QUESTIONED-OUT IN OHIO
DEAR QUESTIONED-OUT: I recommend you clear the air with Vanessa ASAP. Tell her you intended to propose only once in your life, and that her request has hurt your feelings. If she still insists on a second proposal, ask for a script so you won't disappoint her again. Then be prepared to have her provide you with them regularly, because unless you're a mind reader, it's the only way you'll live up to her fantasies.