DEAR ABBY: For years I have wondered about this every time I have gone to a funeral and have ridden in the procession to the cemetery.

As the procession travels to the cemetery, all cars and trucks pull over and stop. That custom strikes me as very touching. I was in another procession last week, and even the UPS truck and several semis pulled over.

My question is, is this a custom only in southern Indiana where I live, or does everyone do this? -- WONDERING NEAR INDIANAPOLIS

DEAR WONDERING: According to Emily Post, this consideration should be accorded regardless of where people live. She writes: "If you encounter a funeral cortege (signaled by a line of cars with headlights or flashing hazard lights on), it's respectful to pull over to the side of the street until the cars have passed. Waiting at a green light while a cortege passes is also expected, even if someone behind you is honking to proceed."

DEAR ABBY: "Charlene" and I dated 10 years ago. We remained friends after dating. At the time, she was plus-sized.

I moved away for a while, and now that I am back, Charlene will talk to me only on the phone and not in person. Her reason is she is much too large now to let me see her. She doesn't want any human contact at all, and I'm scared for her. I have told her many times that I don't care about her weight. I want to see her, but she won't budge. I don't know how to get her to snap out of it. Help! -- KEPT AWAY IN PHILADELPHIA

DEAR KEPT AWAY: If Charlene has family and you know how to contact them, do so. Outline your concern that their relative has gained so much weight she's gone into hiding -- and hope they can convince her to seek help. Other than that, there's no way to force direct contact on someone who doesn't want to see you. However, you should continue to be a supportive telephone friend. She may need all the emotional support she will allow.

DEAR ABBY: I divorced two years ago after 25 years of marriage. During the divorce I met a man who helped me through the emotional roller coaster I was on. We became close and hoped to be married eventually. He died unexpectedly of a heart attack.

My mother introduced me to another man, "Donald," who is good and kind, but who was "burned" after a divorce and a long relationship. We see each other once a week, but I'd like to see him more often.

I'm having trouble being in limbo and not becoming too attached to Donald. Conventional wisdom tells me to stop waiting for him to come around. I work, volunteer, and have been asked out by other men. I have turned them down so as not to jeopardize what I currently have. Donald isn't seeing anyone else.

Can you please help set me straight once and for all? I'm in my late 40s and feeling blue about my dating situation. -- UNCERTAIN IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR UNCERTAIN: Has Donald told you he's not interested in marrying again? If not, he may warm to the idea eventually. However, for him to expect you to date him exclusively with no commitment on his part is unfair to you.

How long have you been seeing him? It seems to me you need to have a mature discussion. From where I sit you have no reason to feel blue. You're seeing him once a week, having a guaranteed good time, and you can explore the possibility of a permanent relationship with him or any of the other men who have shown an interest. So think positive and enjoy yourself.

DEAR ABBY: I am currently deployed in Afghanistan. My best friend's little sister, "Brittany," has had a crush on me for years. She has been straightforward about what she wants -- marriage, kids, white picket fence, etc. She has always been like a little sister, so it has been awkward. I thought it was weird for a 15-year-old (at the time) to say that to an older soldier on R&R.

During my deployment Brittany has sent me care packages loaded with cookies. Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut about my weakness for homemade cookies, but hindsight is 20/20. Brittany has now called in the bribe by inviting me to her senior prom. Not wanting to mess with the steady supply of baked goods, I said yes. I figure it's an appropriate way to say thanks for the cookies.

I intend to make sure Brittany enjoys her prom with her medal-covered arm candy, but I need to let her know that while I'm flattered she thinks so highly of me, I'm not interested in dating her. I love her like a sister. I don't want to break her heart.

Any suggestions for a guy who's about as subtle as a tank rolling down a cobblestone road on a Sunday? -- MEDAL-COVERED EYE CANDY

DEAR EYE CANDY: How long has it been since you've seen Brittany? When you return for that prom, she will no longer be that precocious 15-year-old you remember. By all means show her a nice evening. But don't say anything you might regret or you may have to eat your words instead of those cookies. If you're not romantically interested, you'll date other women and Brittany will catch on soon enough. And you may find that after her glamorous evening with her medal-covered war hero, she sets her sights on someone other than you. Stranger things have happened.

DEAR ABBY: Spring is here, and with it comes the wedding season. Would you please inform your readers about the importance of answering wedding RSVPs? A lot of people appear to need reminding about the need to respond. Thanks! -- MOTHER OF A BRIDE AND GROOM

DEAR MOTHER: I'm glad to oblige -- and congratulations on the double blessing that's coming your way in gaining both a daughter and a son!

Readers: When a formal invitation is received, you should immediately return the RSVP card that's enclosed with it. RSVP is the abbreviation for the French phrase "Repondez s'il vous plait," which means "Please reply." It's important for the people planning the affair to know how many guests will attend so they can be properly provided for -- for obvious reasons. So please be polite and don't keep them wondering.

DEAR ABBY: I'm in love with a woman named "Camille" who has three children from three different fathers. She has never been married. She also has a male "friend" whom she has her children calling "Daddy" even though he's not. I have loved Camille for 20 years, and our paths recently crossed again. When I first met her, she had only one child.

Camille says she loves me and wants us to be married, but I'm having a hard time accepting that all of these children's fathers will be part of our life -- as well as the "friend." Can a psychologist help me get past this? -- DEVOTED IN BLOOMINGTON, MINN.

DEAR DEVOTED: I don't know. But before you take this relationship further, you should definitely see one.

DEAR ABBY: I am a high school senior who has been filling out applications for college. I have found a few small liberal arts colleges I'd love to attend, and I have a favorite.

My problem: My father has been out of work for quite some time. He has applied for a job at a large state college. I visited the school and don't like it because it's a huge party school. My mother has now informed me that if Dad gets the job, I'll have no choice but to go there because we would get a 70 percent discount in tuition.

I feel angry and guilty at the same time. The anger is because my parents had promised me that college would be my choice. The guilt is for not wanting my father to get this job, even though it would greatly help my family's financial situation. Dad has made the second round of the long interview process. What should I do? -- BOUND FOR COLLEGE

DEAR BOUND FOR COLLEGE: Your parents may have promised you your choice of colleges, but that was likely when your family's financial situation was much better. What you should do is, first, pray that your father gets the job he so desperately needs. Then go to the library and start exploring what financial aid or scholarships are available at the schools you'd prefer to attend.

Also, don't turn up your nose at the state college just yet. While it may have a reputation as a party school, that doesn't mean you have to participate in the festivities. If you're a serious student, you can still get an excellent education and your degree, if you're willing to keep your shoulder to the grindstone and work for it.

DEAR ABBY: I have been happily married to my husband for 20 years. My problem is my children want me to make friends. My husband is my best friend. I don't feel the need to go on "girls' nights out" or anything else. I'm happy just to be with him.

I'm not anti-social, just content. Besides, I have seen what can happen to relationships when these kinds of outings go too far. I don't want to offend my kids because they have only my best interests at heart, but I'm tired of the pressure. How can I get my adult children to leave my personal life alone and stop trying to get me to make friends? -- HAPPY AT HOME

DEAR HAPPY: Your children may be urging you to make friends because they are aware that, statistically, women outlive their husbands. They don't want you to be completely isolated if something should happen to their father, or worse, completely dependent upon them for a social life. Frankly, I think they have a point. However, as an adult you can make your own decisions. And if yours is that you don't want to expand your circle (of two), just say it in plain English.

DEAR ABBY: From time to time you print helpful suggestions to readers in your column. Allow me to pass along a no-cost charitable contribution:

I got one of those "airline miles expiring" letters offering magazine subscriptions for the miles. Not wanting or needing any of the magazines that were listed, I had more than a dozen subscriptions sent to our local residential care facility. The residents were thrilled to receive them! -- DAVID M. IN SAN FRANCISCO

DEAR DAVID: What a thoughtful gesture. I'm sure my readers will appreciate your suggestion.