DEAR ABBY: My neighbor "Marlon" and I have been "friends with benefits" for almost two years. We hang out every day and our kids are friends. We talk about everything. Really, we are best friends. We have attempted to hide our affair from our children (8 years old and under) and from our exes. Many of our friends know, but it is never discussed.

My problem is, Marlon recently mentioned that he wants to find a "good woman." It upset me because I'm in love with him. At the same time, he makes no effort to meet anyone. He is always with me -- when you'd think he'd be out trying to meet women. Although we agreed to be "FWBs," I don't want to be Marlon's security blanket. How do I let him know I want more? -- LOVES MY NEIGHBOR

DEAR LOVES YOUR NEIGHBOR: Revisit the subject with Marlon and ask him how many "good women" he thinks he can handle, because he already has one. It couldn't hurt to mention that you are in love with him and have taken your relationship seriously.

If one woman isn't enough for him, you will have to start looking for a good man -- one who won't monopolize your time and take you for granted. Please understand that if Marlon is serious about looking elsewhere for someone to settle down with, you cannot invest any more time or emotion in him.

DEAR ABBY: I am in my 40s and voluntarily quit my job several months ago. My husband and I can afford it, and my job was making me miserable.

My problem is the reaction I get when I tell people. I hear, "Oh, how could you quit your job in this economy?" or, "Aren't you bored?" I volunteer as well as participate in social activities I didn't have time for when I was working. I feel my decision is no one's business, but what do you suggest I say to those who give me negative reactions? -- TIRED OF THE GRIEF IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR TIRED OF THE GRIEF: Perhaps you should resist the urge to announce that you quit your job because it made you miserable. Few people can afford to do that these days, much as they might like to. When you are asked if you are employed, say that you are not. Do not be defensive. If you are questioned further, explain that you do not have a job outside the home, but that you do volunteer work for causes that interest you. If that creates a negative reaction, let it be the other person's problem and not yours.

DEAR ABBY: I became a grandmother a year ago. My son told me I have to join a social networking site if I want information about, or to see pictures of, my grandson. He claims I can find out all I need to know on his profile page.

Abby, I'm not asking for pictures to be sent in the mail, nor am I requesting constant calls about what is taking place. I'm not completely computer illiterate, but I do have an aversion to being grouped with everyone else. I am his mother, but I don't feel as though he thinks of me as someone special.

Am I totally out of touch with today's technology? -- OLD-FASHIONED GRANDMA IN MONTANA

DEAR OLD-FASHIONED: You're not out of touch with today's technology, but you are out of touch with the place that it holds in the lives of people of your son's generation -- as well as many of your own. If you feel in some way disrespected by your son, work it out with him. But please do not allow this to be turned into a power struggle, because you will only alienate yourself from him.

DEAR ABBY: My husband "Larry" and I have been married three months. I adore him, his family and most of his friends. Two of them, however, I can barely tolerate. They show up at our house unannounced and stay for hours.

Larry is too nice to say anything to them about these drop-in visits. They also make disparaging comments about their wives, complaining constantly about their "nagging" and their "faults." One of them has repeatedly cheated on his wife.

I don't want my husband around these men who obviously don't like their wives. I'm afraid what they say will "rub off" on him. I have explained the reasons I dislike his friends, but he says I have nothing to worry about. That doesn't change the way I feel. What can I do? -- WORRIED WIFE IN ARKANSAS

DEAR WORRIED WIFE: Have a little patience and stop telling your husband you think his friends are a threat to your marriage. Instead, schedule as much social time as you can with other couples who have healthy relationships. It shouldn't take long for your husband to realize what sad sacks those two are.

Not all friendships last forever. Sometimes people outgrow them, and that's what I'm hoping your husband will realize without you acting like his "keeper."

DEAR ABBY: I am a longtime member of the U.S. Air Force who has three college-age sons and a 13-year-old daughter, "Carly." Their mother and I divorced eight years ago. I've done everything I can to stay a part of all their lives. My sons and I get out for an occasional round of golf or watch the game over dinner, but Carly and I have reached a disconnect. We were close until early last summer -- swimming, shopping, vacationing or just hanging out at my house. She and my wife have a good relationship. But something has changed.

Now, when we make plans for a movie or dinner or whatever, Carly makes an excuse at the last minute to break it. I asked her what's going on, but she won't tell me. My wife says it's just her age, but I don't understand why I am the one who gets cut out of her life.

Carly's mother and I don't have the best relationship, and she's not interested in discussing these matters, but she says Carly is "just being Carly." Abby, am I worried about nothing? Is my wife right or could there be another issue? -- STILL A DAD IN THE U.S.A.F.

DEAR STILL A DAD: Stop panicking and listen to the women. Your little girl may have been Daddy's girl until last summer --- but she's a teenager now. It's normal for teens to disengage from their parents and develop interests of their own, so relax and don't push. Let Carly know you're there for her and eventually she'll start coming around again. What you have described is not unusual for girls her age.

DEAR ABBY: Do you think it's appropriate to ask for credit on articles I write for our company newsletter? I don't think it's fair to write an article for the HR department and not receive credit for it. It's my creation and I'd like to be recognized. Is this selfish, or is it a reasonable request? -- UNACKNOWLEDGED IN MADISON, OHIO

DEAR UNACKNOWLEDGED: It's reasonable as long as other contributors also receive credit for their articles. In some -- but not all -- companies, that's the case. You are certainly within your rights to make your preference known to whoever is publishing your newsletter. No one may have asked before.

DEAR READERS: Welcome to 2011! While the last year has been arduous for many of us, a new one has arrived, bringing with it our chance for a new beginning.

Today is the day we discard destructive old habits for healthy new ones, and with that in mind, I will share Dear Abby's often requested list of New Year's Resolutions -- which were adapted by my mother, Pauline Phillips, from the original credo of Al-Anon:

JUST FOR TODAY: I will live through this day only. I will not brood about yesterday or obsess about tomorrow. I will not set far-reaching goals or try to overcome all of my problems at once.

I know that I can do something for 24 hours that would overwhelm me if I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will be happy. I will not dwell on thoughts that depress me. If my mind fills with clouds, I will chase them away and fill it with sunshine.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will accept what is. I will face reality. I will correct those things that I can correct and accept those I cannot.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will improve my mind. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration. I will not be a mental loafer.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will make a conscious effort to be agreeable. I will be kind and courteous to those who cross my path, and I'll not speak ill of others. I will improve my appearance, speak softly, and not interrupt when someone else is talking.

Just for today, I will refrain from improving anybody but myself.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will do something positive to improve my health. If I'm a smoker, I'll quit. If I am overweight, I will eat healthfully -- if only just for today. And not only that, I will get off the couch and take a brisk walk, even if it's only around the block.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will gather the courage to do what is right and take responsibility for my own actions.

And now, Dear Readers, I would like to share an item that was sent to me by I.J. Bhatia, a reader who lives in New Delhi, India:

DEAR ABBY: This year, no resolutions, only some guidelines. The Holy Vedas say, "Man has subjected himself to thousands of self-inflicted bondages. Wisdom comes to a man who lives according to the true eternal laws of nature."

The prayer of St. Francis (of which there are several versions) contains a powerful message:

"Lord, make me an instrument of your peace:

"where there is hatred, let me sow love,

"where there is injury, pardon;

"where there is doubt, faith;

"where there is despair, hope;

"where there is darkness, light;

"and where there is sadness, joy.

"O Divine Master,

"grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;

"to be understood, as to understand;

"to be loved, as to love;

"for it is in giving that we receive,

"it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

"and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life."

And so, Dear Readers, may this new year bring with it good health, peace and joy to all of you. Love, ABBY