DEAR ABBY: My son "Clay" has been married seven years. There are times I like to discuss things of a personal nature with him having to do with our family, and I have asked him not to mention our talks with his wife. These discussions have nothing to do with her.
The problem is whatever he tells her, she repeats to her whole family. I do not want our personal problems and other matters to be known by everyone.
My other son has no trouble keeping our talks just between us, but Clay says he and his wife have "no secrets" from each other. Abby, is it OK to ask a married son or daughter not to divulge things to a spouse that have nothing to do with her or him? -- CONFIDENTIALLY IN ST. LOUIS
DEAR CONFIDENTIALLY: It's OK to ask; it's also OK to say no. When Clay married his wife, she became part of your family. Now that you know your son keeps no secrets from his wife, and that she leaks like a sieve, the better part of wisdom would be to stop confiding in him. Don't you think?