life

Car Names Suggest That You Are What You Drive

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | March 30th, 2010

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I had fun coming up with cars that fit with certain professions (Jan. 23). It made a long car ride seem short. Here's what we came up with: The Greek epic poet Homer would have a Honda Odyssey, and a firefighter a Chevy Blazer. An entomologist would crawl through traffic in his Mitsubishi Spyder. A meteorologist would drive a Honda Element, an astronomer would have a Mitsubishi Eclipse and an optician a Ford Focus. Picasso would paint the town in his Nissan Cube, an ornithologist would use a Ford Falcon and his lawyer would drive a Honda Civic. -- MEGAN T., RIDING THE HIGHWAYS IN BELVIDERE, N.J.

DEAR MEGAN: I'm pleased I was able to make your road trip more enjoyable. Readers, you amaze me! You put the pedal to the metal and came up with some ingenious responses. My staff and I had a great time reading them. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: Stretching my imagination, I envisioned Jacques Cousteau with his Plymouth Barracuda, King Arthur in an Excalibur Phaeton and "Mini-Me" in a Mini Cooper. "Dog the Bounty Hunter" would choose a Mercury Tracer. And don't you think Cadillac had Disney villainess "Cruella" in mind when it came out with the "DeVille"? -- WINNI AT THE WHEEL IN L.A.

DEAR ABBY: I work at a correctional facility and had to laugh when I saw the warden drive up in his Ford Escape! -- JAZZY IN WAYNESBORO, TENN.

DEAR ABBY: Here's my suggestion: Clint Eastwood driving a Dodge Magnum with a Magnum Force plate -- no, wait, he can't have that one because I already do! -- DONNA IN SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA

DEAR ABBY: How about pairing these names and cars? Astronomer Carl Sagan in a Mercury Comet, decathlon winner Bruce Jenner in his Javelin, Mr. T. in his very own Model T. And finally, Albert Einstein sporting around in -- what else -- a Smart Car. -- STEVEN, ALONG FOR THE RIDE IN L.A.

DEAR ABBY: I have one: Michael Phelps in his Ford Freestyle. -- EMILIE IN ALBUQUERQUE, N.M.

DEAR ABBY: I submit the following: Keanu Reeves driving a Toyota Matrix, Courteney Cox cruising around in her Mercury Cougar, Dizzy Gillespie in a Dodge Coronet and Thomas Edison in a Chevy Volt. When Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger isn't driving around in his Hummer, he'd be using his Ford Flex, and Ben Franklin would drive a Jeep Liberty. Abby, thanks for providing so many funny moments as well as insightful advice. -- GREG IN GLADEWATER, TEXAS

DEAR ABBY: If some famous people were alive today, they'd have some interesting choices. Christopher Columbus might drive a Ford Explorer and Daniel Boone a Mercury Mountaineer. -- TERI IN ORRVILLE, OHIO

DEAR ABBY: We're up to the challenge here in Oregon. A Navy captain driving his PT Cruiser, a housekeeper in her Plymouth Duster and, finally, the local weatherman in his Oldsmobile Toronado. -- DEBBIE IN EUGENE

DEAR ABBY: I have the perfect model for the 12 disciples. The Bible says they were all in one Accord. -- JANE RIVERA IN PENNSYLVANIA

life

Uncredited Use of Photos Has Woman Ready to Snap

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | March 29th, 2010 | Letter 1 of 4

DEAR ABBY: For the past several years, my husband's sister-in-law, "Janine," has used my photographs (with my permission) in calendars she has made as gifts to different family members. One year, I asked her if she would have one made for me since most of the photos in it were mine. Her answer: "No, make your own."

Last year, at a cousin's wedding, Janine came up to me and told me to be sure to take some "good pictures" for HER calendar. I just about lost it! And for the current year's calendar, she had her husband ask for 12 more photos.

I feel Janine has been using me to give gifts with her name on them to other family members. I get none of the credit for having taken the pictures. It seems to me that she is stealing. What do you think? -- "DEVELOPING" A GRUDGE IN KANSAS

DEAR "DEVELOPING": I disagree that what your sister-in-law is doing is stealing, because by giving her the pictures with no conditional stipulation -- in this case, being given the credit for having taken them -- you are enabling her. And I "think" the time has come for you to insist that your name be on the pictures, or that she take her own photos for "her" calendar. Don't you?

life

Dear Abby for March 29, 2010

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | March 29th, 2010 | Letter 2 of 4

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend is 43 and I am 48. I admit he moved in very fast -- a few weeks after he lost his job.

After three months his mood began to change. He tells me he loves me and I'm the greatest thing that ever happened to him, but I noticed he was becoming quiet and withdrawn. I texted him at work to ask if something was wrong, and he said "things" were on his mind. I asked was it me? He said no.

When he came home I asked what was wrong, and he said things were happening too fast, that he wanted his own place and to move around as he wants to. I asked him if he sees me in his future, and he said, "Yes. Just bear with me and give me some time."

I need advice, Abby. I am so confused. I love him dearly. -- TORN APART IN TOMBALL, TEXAS

DEAR TORN APART: When a man tells you things have moved too quickly and he needs time and space, that is what you have to give him. He may care for you, but unless you give him the chance to miss the comforts you provide him, what you want won't happen. And the harder you try to cling, the more it will drive him away.

life

Dear Abby for March 29, 2010

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | March 29th, 2010 | Letter 3 of 4

DEAR ABBY: My stepdaughter is being married for the first time to the father of her two children. She is planning a large traditional wedding in which her father will give her away. She wants to include their children in the ceremony, too.

Under the circumstances, wouldn't a small wedding (without the long white dress and associated traditions) be more appropriate? My opinion has not been requested, nor would I ever provide it, but I am curious because I believe some of the older relatives in the family may be shocked. -- SOMEWHAT SHOCKED MYSELF IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR SOMEWHAT: Unless the older relatives in the family have been living in seclusion, with no magazines, tabloids, television and the Internet, I'm sure they realize that in the last 40 years some of the old rules have been retired. Among them: restrictions against large church weddings for longtime cohabitating couples and white dresses for non-virgin brides. Should any of the old folks show signs of shock, offer a shoulder for them to lean on. But don't be surprised if none of them is surprised at all.

life

Dear Abby for March 29, 2010

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | March 29th, 2010 | Letter 4 of 4

TO MY JEWISH READERS: Sundown marks the first night of Passover. Happy Passover, everyone!

life

Mom Is Fired Up After Son Is Stood Up by His Date

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | March 28th, 2010 | Letter 1 of 2

DEAR ABBY: My son, "Peter," is in college working on a postgraduate degree. He arranged a date with a young woman while they were home over the holidays. After accepting the first date and breaking it, she agreed to a second one. As Peter was driving to pick her up, he called to double-check her address only to be told she was still at a previous engagement. Naturally, Peter expected she'd call back when she was free -- but she didn't. There was no explanation, no call or text or any further communication.

What is happening to young people today? Do texting and online social networking encourage them to avoid simple human kindness and consideration of others? I think these new devices are giving kids an easy way to get out of difficult and uncomfortable situations. They don't have to hear the hurt of rejection or the sting of their rudeness through a text or a chat page.

Meanwhile, my thoughtful, sensitive son sat home thinking he wasn't important enough for an explanation! At 26 he's beginning to think he should just focus on finishing school and forget the dating scene. And if this is the caliber of today's young women, maybe he should! -- MOTHER OF A GOOD SON

DEAR MOTHER: Your son may be thoughtful and sensitive, but he appears to have unfortunate taste in women. You say he is working on a postgraduate degree? How old was the girl -- because she appears to have the emotional maturity of a young teenager. Nobody likes rejection, but Peter should consider the source. Rather than giving up on dating, he should look for company among women who are at his intellectual and emotional level -- in college or grad school or perhaps a little older.

life

Dear Abby for March 28, 2010

Dear Abby by by Abigail Van Buren
by Abigail Van Buren
Dear Abby | March 28th, 2010 | Letter 2 of 2

DEAR ABBY: I am a 29-year-old female who would like to know why people feel compelled to tell random strangers to "smile."

I was in the market the other night and a man came walking by me saying, "You dropped something," and was pointing to the floor. I looked down and said, "I don't see anything." He then told me, "You dropped your smile."

Abby, I was SO not amused. I turned around going back to my business saying, "Oh, OK." The man proceeded to walk away mumbling, "Don't look so serious. It's only the grocery store."

I hate when people do this. It happens to me a lot and has most of my life. People -- especially seniors -- say, "Don't you dare smile for me, don't you dare!" Or, "Smile! You're too cute not to smile." An old gentleman said, "Oh, she's like ice -- so cold, never smiles."

What can I do if this happens again? I don't see the need to walk around the store or sit at my desk at work with a Cheshire cat grin on my face all day. Any suggestions? -- OFFENDED IN GILROY, CALIF.

DEAR OFFENDED: The man who asked if you had "lost" something may have been making a clumsy attempt to pick you up. That sometimes happens in markets. As to the "older people" who comment on your expression -- or lack thereof -- they may consider themselves so "senior" that they can "coax" you into doing as they would like -- like "coochy-kooing" a baby to make it laugh on cue.

Making personal remarks to strangers is, of course, rude. My advice to you is to distance yourself from those individuals as quickly as possible. Speaking personally, if I was approached the way you have been, the last thing I'd be inclined to do is smile or engage them at all. I'd be offended, too.

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