DEAR ABBY: For the past several years, my husband's sister-in-law, "Janine," has used my photographs (with my permission) in calendars she has made as gifts to different family members. One year, I asked her if she would have one made for me since most of the photos in it were mine. Her answer: "No, make your own."

Last year, at a cousin's wedding, Janine came up to me and told me to be sure to take some "good pictures" for HER calendar. I just about lost it! And for the current year's calendar, she had her husband ask for 12 more photos.

I feel Janine has been using me to give gifts with her name on them to other family members. I get none of the credit for having taken the pictures. It seems to me that she is stealing. What do you think? -- "DEVELOPING" A GRUDGE IN KANSAS

DEAR "DEVELOPING": I disagree that what your sister-in-law is doing is stealing, because by giving her the pictures with no conditional stipulation -- in this case, being given the credit for having taken them -- you are enabling her. And I "think" the time has come for you to insist that your name be on the pictures, or that she take her own photos for "her" calendar. Don't you?

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend is 43 and I am 48. I admit he moved in very fast -- a few weeks after he lost his job.

After three months his mood began to change. He tells me he loves me and I'm the greatest thing that ever happened to him, but I noticed he was becoming quiet and withdrawn. I texted him at work to ask if something was wrong, and he said "things" were on his mind. I asked was it me? He said no.

When he came home I asked what was wrong, and he said things were happening too fast, that he wanted his own place and to move around as he wants to. I asked him if he sees me in his future, and he said, "Yes. Just bear with me and give me some time."

I need advice, Abby. I am so confused. I love him dearly. -- TORN APART IN TOMBALL, TEXAS

DEAR TORN APART: When a man tells you things have moved too quickly and he needs time and space, that is what you have to give him. He may care for you, but unless you give him the chance to miss the comforts you provide him, what you want won't happen. And the harder you try to cling, the more it will drive him away.

DEAR ABBY: My stepdaughter is being married for the first time to the father of her two children. She is planning a large traditional wedding in which her father will give her away. She wants to include their children in the ceremony, too.

Under the circumstances, wouldn't a small wedding (without the long white dress and associated traditions) be more appropriate? My opinion has not been requested, nor would I ever provide it, but I am curious because I believe some of the older relatives in the family may be shocked. -- SOMEWHAT SHOCKED MYSELF IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR SOMEWHAT: Unless the older relatives in the family have been living in seclusion, with no magazines, tabloids, television and the Internet, I'm sure they realize that in the last 40 years some of the old rules have been retired. Among them: restrictions against large church weddings for longtime cohabitating couples and white dresses for non-virgin brides. Should any of the old folks show signs of shock, offer a shoulder for them to lean on. But don't be surprised if none of them is surprised at all.

TO MY JEWISH READERS: Sundown marks the first night of Passover. Happy Passover, everyone!

DEAR ABBY: My son, "Peter," is in college working on a postgraduate degree. He arranged a date with a young woman while they were home over the holidays. After accepting the first date and breaking it, she agreed to a second one. As Peter was driving to pick her up, he called to double-check her address only to be told she was still at a previous engagement. Naturally, Peter expected she'd call back when she was free -- but she didn't. There was no explanation, no call or text or any further communication.

What is happening to young people today? Do texting and online social networking encourage them to avoid simple human kindness and consideration of others? I think these new devices are giving kids an easy way to get out of difficult and uncomfortable situations. They don't have to hear the hurt of rejection or the sting of their rudeness through a text or a chat page.

Meanwhile, my thoughtful, sensitive son sat home thinking he wasn't important enough for an explanation! At 26 he's beginning to think he should just focus on finishing school and forget the dating scene. And if this is the caliber of today's young women, maybe he should! -- MOTHER OF A GOOD SON

DEAR MOTHER: Your son may be thoughtful and sensitive, but he appears to have unfortunate taste in women. You say he is working on a postgraduate degree? How old was the girl -- because she appears to have the emotional maturity of a young teenager. Nobody likes rejection, but Peter should consider the source. Rather than giving up on dating, he should look for company among women who are at his intellectual and emotional level -- in college or grad school or perhaps a little older.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 29-year-old female who would like to know why people feel compelled to tell random strangers to "smile."

I was in the market the other night and a man came walking by me saying, "You dropped something," and was pointing to the floor. I looked down and said, "I don't see anything." He then told me, "You dropped your smile."

Abby, I was SO not amused. I turned around going back to my business saying, "Oh, OK." The man proceeded to walk away mumbling, "Don't look so serious. It's only the grocery store."

I hate when people do this. It happens to me a lot and has most of my life. People -- especially seniors -- say, "Don't you dare smile for me, don't you dare!" Or, "Smile! You're too cute not to smile." An old gentleman said, "Oh, she's like ice -- so cold, never smiles."

What can I do if this happens again? I don't see the need to walk around the store or sit at my desk at work with a Cheshire cat grin on my face all day. Any suggestions? -- OFFENDED IN GILROY, CALIF.

DEAR OFFENDED: The man who asked if you had "lost" something may have been making a clumsy attempt to pick you up. That sometimes happens in markets. As to the "older people" who comment on your expression -- or lack thereof -- they may consider themselves so "senior" that they can "coax" you into doing as they would like -- like "coochy-kooing" a baby to make it laugh on cue.

Making personal remarks to strangers is, of course, rude. My advice to you is to distance yourself from those individuals as quickly as possible. Speaking personally, if I was approached the way you have been, the last thing I'd be inclined to do is smile or engage them at all. I'd be offended, too.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 16 and have grown up religious my whole life. I get good grades and stay out of trouble. A lot of my friends have done crazy things like drinking and partying, but I haven't. Because of this, I have the reputation of being a "goody-two-shoes."

I'm not saying it's a bad thing being a good girl, but I don't want to be a goody-two-shoes. Part of me wants to try some of the stuff my friends have been doing, but I don't want to lose my parents' trust. Please help! -- RESTLESS IN OREGON

DEAR RESTLESS: You have your parents' trust because you have earned it. Before you try any of the "stuff" your friends have been doing, ask yourself what the consequences could be. Yes, it's hard being labeled a goody-two-shoes -- but please look closely at who is doing the name-calling. A streetwise individual once told me, "The best way out of a jam is not to get into one in the first place." That tidbit has served me well, and that's why I'm passing it along to you.

DEAR ABBY: My daughter left our small Midwestern town for the West Coast to marry money. At 37, she finally snagged her millionaire. She thought it was going to give her a blank check.

She does live in a lovely home and drives an expensive foreign car, but that's where it ends. Everything is in his name, and her wedding ring is one we gave her, although he paid to remove the stone and have it polished. I told her then to walk away.

They have two children. Her son is a spoiled brat, completely self-absorbed like his dad. Her daughter has learning disabilities and is still at home.

More than one family member refers to her spouse as a horse's rear end. He rarely attends family events, which is really fine with everyone. At best, he can be described as rude and obnoxious.

My daughter would never leave him. She loves the lifestyle too much. If she only knew how most of her extended family think of them. I'm embarrassed by it, really.

I just thought your readers should know that marrying money isn't necessarily the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. -- HER MOM IN WISCONSIN

DEAR MOM: I'll say. Someone who marries for money usually ends up earning every single penny.

DEAR ABBY: My husband was recently invited to the wedding of one of his co-workers. The wedding is in Mexico. Shouldn't these types of invitations be issued to family and very close friends only? I can't help but feel she is just looking for a gift. Is this proper, or am I "seeing" the bigger picture? -- ANNOYED IN ILLINOIS

DEAR ANNOYED: No, and there are a few things wrong with this "picture." If the co-worker knows your husband is married, the invitation should have properly been addressed to "Mr. and Mrs." Since it wasn't, and I assume your husband has no intention of attending, he should send his regrets.

However, because the bride is someone he will be interacting with on an ongoing basis, the politic way to handle this would be to present the happy couple with a token gift from both of you upon their return -- although you are not socially obligated to do so.