DEAR ABBY: I need your help badly. I am 39 years old and live with my mother due to a physical disability. Mom becomes violent when she gets mad or upset. If she's having a bad day, I can expect her to be in my face (literally). She yells and screams, and if I refuse to yell back at her or try to ignore her -- the only way I know how to deal with the situation -- she gets even madder.
I have suggested counseling, but she insists that she is fine and that I'm the one who needs the help. What do I do? I can't keep on this way, and I am unable to go anywhere. -- CAN'T STAND THE VIOLENCE
DEAR CAN'T: Your mother is an emotional mess, but she is half-right. You DO need help. And the place you can get it is the National Adult Protective Services Association (NAPSA). It's an organization that has been around for 20 years -- and has members in all 50 states as well as Canada. Here's how to find them: Go to www.apsnetwork.org. Next, click on "Report Abuse," then click on your state.
Your mother needs help, too, and the people at Adult Protective Services can help her face that reality. Please write again and let me know how you're doing. I care.