DEAR ABBY: Three years ago, my brother, "Frank," donated a kidney to me. Of course I'm grateful and have told him so many times.
The problem? Frank talks about it every time I see him. If we attend a funeral, he will say that the person in the coffin would have been me if not for him. He will tell complete strangers in a store, "Ask her what I gave her!" He even took me to a school reunion picnic so he could show his former teachers what a wonderful person he is.
I'm glad I received the kidney. It has added quality to my life. But how can I let my brother know that while I am appreciative, I am also really tired of hearing him remind me every day? -- GRATEFUL SISTER IN KENTUCKY
DEAR SISTER: You may not be able to. Your brother is proud of the fact that he was able to help you. However, if he was truly convinced that he is a good person, he wouldn't feel the need to constantly point it out to strangers, acquaintances and to you.
Tempting as it may be, resist the urge to tell him you're tiring of carrying the burden of gratitude. Continue to reinforce what a good brother he was for literally giving you the gift of self, and return the favor by continuing to pump up his fragile ego. It's a fair exchange.