DEAR ABBY: I am a single woman who dates and is not in a serious relationship right now. I'm enjoying my life, having fun, but have met someone along the way who is becoming important. I'm getting the same vibes from him.
Before meeting "Mr. New," I booked a Caribbean vacation with someone I have dated off and one for a few years. Now I'm worried. What if things progress with Mr. New? How will I tell him, and how will he feel about my going on vacation with "Mr. Standby"? I don't think lying is the answer, but I could say I was going with a girlfriend. But what if we become something more and he finds out I lied to him?
The trip is coming up soon and I don't know when -- or if -- I should tell Mr. New. Who knows? We could be over by then, although I hope not. Any advice would be appreciated. -- SINGLE GIRL IN PINE HILL, N.J.
DEAR SINGLE GIRL: I'm surprised you would still be enthusiastic about "tripping" with Mr. Standby while you're falling for Mr. New. Do not lie. The truth has a way of coming out, and if you do, it will wreck your credibility and the romance as well.
I advise you to level with Standby and let him know you met someone. He needs to find another travel companion ASAP. There will probably be a penalty for assigning your pre-purchased ticket to someone else. If there is, offer to pay it. It's the price of being honorable.
P.S. If Mr. New does not turn out to be Mr. Right, you can always take another trip with Mr. Standby next year if he is still willing to date you. (However, if he reads Dear Abby and recognizes that you consider him only "Mr. Standby," he may not be.)