DEAR ABBY: At 17, I learned I could never have children. I was devastated. I thought there would never be a "happily ever after" for me. I was wrong. I have been happily married to a wonderful man for four years. I was honest with him about my infertility, and it made no difference to him.
The problem is my father-in-law. Although my husband has two sisters, he is the only son of an only son, and his dad is always pushing the baby issue. He says things like, "If I could only have a grandson before I die," or, "When are you going to get busy and have me a baby?" When I remind him that he has a grandson, he says it doesn't matter. He wants one with HIS last name.
My husband thinks I should just tell his father the truth -- that I can't have children -- but I'm afraid his parents will hate me. It has been seven years since I learned I can't have children, and I still feel an emptiness inside. And just when I think I can't feel any worse, my father-in-law's comments make me feel broken and useless. I could use some advice. -- CHILDLESS IN ARKANSAS
DEAR CHILDLESS: I agree with your husband. The two of you should have a frank talk with his parents. Explain to his father that his comments are hurtful and why. He needs to know the truth. If you are "hated" after that, the problem is theirs -- not yours.
P.S. Even if you could have children, there is no guarantee that they wouldn't all be girls. Big Daddy is overdue for a dose of reality.