DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are going through a financial situation which many families seem to face these days, where the wife has to take care of the family's finances.
Yesterday my husband asked me to give him some money. Of course I told him I would give it to him, but I wanted to know what he needed it for because I had given him enough a week ago that should have gotten him through a minimum of three weeks.
My husband became angry and told me to "forget the money," that he would manage one way or another. I tried explaining to him that if the situation was the other way around, he would have wanted to know what I needed the money for and that I was only concerned, but he's still mad at me. I apologized, but he's still hurt.
Was it wrong to ask him what he needed the money for?
-- WORRIED WIFE IN NIGERIA
DEAR WORRIED WIFE: Your question was probably spontaneous, and certainly to the point. More than what happened to the money, your husband's defensive reaction is cause for concern. If he was proud of where the money went, he would have answered the question.
However, please consider that another reason he may have overreacted is that he feels it should be his place to be the breadwinner -- and the fact that you are is a blow to his ego.