DEAR ABBY: I am recently married, and every night my husband "tells" me when it's time for us to retire for the night. This can be anytime from 9:30 to 11:30 p.m.
If I tell him -- which is not often -- that I am ready for bed before he is, he gets upset. However, if he is ready to go to bed, and I tell him I'd like to finish a book I'm reading or watch a little more TV, he gets upset.
When I try to talk to him about this, he says that married men and women should go to bed "together," period! But Abby, it is always on his timetable. What about mine? Needless to say, we have both gone to bed angry.
How do we deal with this without both of us getting angry and resenting each other? -- TIRED OF BEING TIRED, DES MOINES, IOWA
DEAR TIRED OF BEING TIRED: It appears you have married a man with control issues. Being married does not mean being joined at the hip. People have different biorhythms, and a trip down the aisle does not magically transform a night person into a day person or vice versa.
I'm all for young married love and the spirit of togetherness, but only if it's voluntary. Your husband needs to learn the art of compromise because it appears he is being extremely heavy-handed.