DEAR ABBY: This may seem like a dumb question, but I really need to know the answer. Can you get pregnant when your breasts are still underdeveloped?

My boyfriend says you can't, but I need to know for sure. I'm afraid to keep birth control in my room because my little sister, who I have to share a room with, constantly snoops through my stuff when I'm not there. She would be sure to show it to our parents if she found it because she loves to get me in trouble, so I really need to know the answer to this. -- QUESTIONING IN OKLAHOMA

DEAR QUESTIONING: There is no such thing as a "dumb" question.

Your boyfriend is mistaken. Breast development has nothing to do with whether a girl can become pregnant. The onset of a young woman's menstrual cycle has everything to do with it. Under no circumstances should you have unprotected sex. Not only will it place you at risk for pregnancy, but also for sexually transmitted infections.

DEAR ABBY: After six months of marriage, my son and daughter-in-law have decided that it is not what they wanted. They are being divorced. They would like to return the gifts of money they received from family and friends, along with the other gifts they received.

How should they go about returning the money, and what do you say to well-wishing people? -- EMBARRASSED AND DISAPPOINTED IN NEW YORK

DEAR EMBARRASSED AND DISAPPOINTED: Rather than feeling "embarrassed and disappointed," be glad that your son and daughter-in-law realized they had made a mistake before any grandchildren came along.

Let's hope they made a list of how much money each of the donors gave them. If that's the case, they should have no trouble writing checks to them for that amount. The checks should be enclosed with a brief note, thanking them again for their generosity, and telling them that "regretfully, the marriage did not work out." The same is true for any UNUSED wedding gifts.

DEAR ABBY: What do you do about an ex-fiance who just won't let go? I ended the engagement 10 months ago and have moved on. However, my ex has sent me letters, and there is evidence that he has sat on my front porch waiting for me to come home.

Recently he found out through a mutual friend that I have been seeing someone. He keeps trying to pry details about my new relationship out of this friend. I'm sure he's trying to find out if I was dating while I was still engaged.

Now he plans to attend a community theater production I am appearing in. How do I handle this situation? -- NEEDS AN "EX"ORCIST IN ST. CHARLES, MO.

DEAR NEEDS AN "EX"ORCIST: Your former fiance appears to be obsessed with you, to the point that you are being stalked. Whether you dated someone while you were engaged to him is irrelevant because the relationship is over.

Because his behavior is obsessive, I recommend you discuss this problem with your local police department. They can tell you what precautions you may need to take -- and also if the man has a prior history of stalking behavior.

To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Keepers Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)

DEAR ABBY: I couldn't help but add my two cents to the letter you printed from "Hungry in Madison Heights, Mich." (March 2), about the supervisor who stole everyone's food, candy, etc.

At my job, we had the same problem. "Dan" would open people's drawers and eat whatever he found, too. He would even go into lunch bags. It didn't matter if you were sitting there or not -- if it was food, he was into it!

One day a man who worked with him opened his desk drawer and realized that a tiny field mouse had gnawed through the wrapper of his candy bar and eaten part of it. He took the bar out of his desk and left it sitting there while he went to find someone to take care of the mouse. While he was gone, Dan entered his office, saw the candy, and took and ate it! Everyone except me was upset about him eating something that a mouse had nibbled. I was glad! Needless to say, Dan never took what wasn't his again. -- MAUREEN IN WEST CHICAGO

DEAR MAUREEN: When I printed that letter from "Hungry," I had no idea how pervasive the problem is. Some readers suggested that the supervisor suffered from a compulsive eating disorder or undiagnosed diabetes. Others said he was simply a jerk. And here's how they dealt with it:

DEAR ABBY: My husband was plagued by a co-worker who ate treats from his desk. I told him to set out some "cookies" I had just purchased at Petco. They look exactly like human cream cookies. My husband left them out when he knew the offender would be around, and then left the office. When he returned, sure enough -- the cookies were gone. Nothing was ever said, but he never raided my husband's desk again. -- GAYLE IN PORT ORCHARD, WASH.

DEAR ABBY: I have a rather naughty solution for "Hungry in Madison Heights." Place a bowl of sugar-free candy on his desk. I guarantee the supervisor won't dip into it more than once before he learns about the way sorbitol acts on one's digestive system. -- NANCY IN FOWLER, OHIO

DEAR ABBY: That letter brought back a memory that made me laugh. In order to prevent her brothers from chowing down on her personal snacks, my youngest daughter would -- in full view of them -- lightly lick the top of the cookies, container of popcorn, etc. After that, they wouldn't touch it! -- CAROL IN BEACON FALLS, CONN.

DEAR ABBY: That supervisor is nothing more than a bully. He's using his position as their boss to belittle them and crush their egos into submission. He's stealing from them and damaging production potential by creating a hostile workplace. Perhaps if Human Resources saw the damage done in dollar signs, they would have been more helpful and paid attention to the complaints in the first place.

The afflicted workers should sign statements attesting to what he has been doing and send them en masse to the man's supervisor. If nothing is done or retaliation occurs, legal action should be set in motion. -- BULLIED ONCE IN BUFFALO

DEAR ABBY: If "Hungry's" co-workers are imaginative, the next time the supervisor opens a candy box in their desk drawers, the man will find six or eight copies of your column inside. -- DALE IN EL CERRITO, CALIF.

For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more attractive person, order "How to Be Popular." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: Please help me to warn your readers about an alarming trend happening in the teenage community: prom babies. I first heard about it while driving my teenage daughter to a lacrosse meet with several of her girlfriends. One girl in the car, "Carrie," said she hoped this year she could have a prom baby. The girls were discussing two former classmates from last year's lacrosse team who had been unable to begin college because they had both become mothers at 17.

Both had deliberately planned to get pregnant on prom night -- hence the term, "prom baby." Abby, both of the girls were studious and hard-working with bright futures ahead of them. One had been accepted to several Ivy League schools. Needless to say, their parents were devastated, and many adjustments had to be made for the new babies.

My daughter later told me that several of her other friends were considering trying to get pregnant near prom time so they, too, wouldn't have to deal with the pressures of going to college. Apparently, parents are less strict about their children's whereabouts on prom night and let their teens spend the night in a hotel or at mixed-gender sleepovers.

I thought this sad trend might be local to our area, but during a class reunion in California I learned the trend may be nationwide. One of my oldest friends, "Dana," confided during the reunion that she had become a grandmother at 43 due to her daughter having a prom baby.

As prom night approaches, please warn parents to talk with their children about the responsibilities of premarital sex and the dangers of a prom baby. -- WORRIED DAD IN ALPHARETTA, GA.

DEAR WORRIED DAD: Your letter was news to me. That a girl headed for an Ivy League college -- or any college, for that matter -- could be so immature that she'd get pregnant so she wouldn't have to go, makes me wonder if she was college material in the first place.

In addition to advising parents to talk to their kids about premarital sex, they should also be reminded how important it is that their daughters be able to communicate honestly and openly with them.

The individuals who should be warned are the young men who will be escorting those young women on prom night. One foolish mistake could lead to a 20-year commitment to support a child before they are emotionally or financially ready for that responsibility. And all because their prom date was afraid to tell her parents she wasn't ready for college? I'm appalled.

DEAR ABBY: I have a 4-year-old who tends to act up from time to time. I have tried "time-outs" and even soft spanking and have taken his privileges away. Nothing seems to work. However, I have found that smashing one of his small toys with a hammer works well. Do you see any danger in this form of punishment? -- YOUNG MOM IN OKLAHOMA

DEAR YOUNG MOM: I certainly do. Smashing a child's toy with a hammer carries the same message that an abusive husband delivers when he smashes his fist through a wall. It implies, "You're next!" If you continue punishing your child in this way, he could begin modeling his behavior after yours and destroy other people's property -- including yours -- when he's angry.

Take the toy away if that's the only way to get through to your son. Tell him that it will be given to a child who has no toys to play with. But do not destroy the toy in front of your child.

For everything you need to know about wedding planning, order "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)