DEAR ABBY: The one-year anniversary of my husband's death is approaching. It has been a long and difficult year, but my children and I are mending. With the anniversary date coming up next month, we have all been feeling depressed.
My problem is I have recently started seeing a gentleman ("Donald") who is kind, loving, generous, and understanding to both me and my children. Although I don't know where this relationship is heading, I do think he is special.
Our conversations sometimes include my husband. (He also speaks of his ex-wife.) I do not want to make Donald feel like second fiddle to my deceased husband. How can I reassure him that although I am hurting over the loss of someone I loved for 20 years -- especially on anniversaries of certain events -- that my relationship with him is important to me? -- STILL GRIEVING, MELBOURNE, FLA.
DEAR STILL GRIEVING: The surest way to reassure Donald would be to address the subject. Ask him, "Does it bother you when I mention my deceased husband?" You may be pleasantly surprised to find that he understands completely. But if he doesn't, then you should tell him exactly what you have told me. I have always believed in the power of communication.