DEAR ABBY: I am a 26-year-old single mom with a 5-year-old daughter. I have been seeing "Rhett," a wonderful, sweet man, for more than a year. I have fallen very much in love with him and he with me -- I think.
Ever since Rhett met my daughter, all the fun, romantic, serious stuff we used to talk about has flown out the window. Anytime I try to talk sexy or serious about our relationship, he acts uncomfortable and changes the subject to my daughter and how she's doing in school, what her interests are, how she's feeling, etc.
This may sound selfish, but I miss the "us" conversations Rhett and I used to have. I am a mother 24/7. I want my romance back! But I'm afraid if I broach the subject, I'll sound jealous.
I am thrilled that Rhett loves my daughter and I know, since he has never had kids, this is a novelty. But it's like the romance has turned into a relationship that's centered exclusively on my daughter. Of course, I want his concern and help in rearing her, but something tells me this isn't normal. Help! -- NOT SELFISH IN GEORGIA
DEAR NOT SELFISH: The "something" that's telling you his behavior isn't normal is your intuition. Please pay attention to your feelings because they are trying to convey something important.
By all means, raise the subject with Rhett, and don't beat around the bush. As it stands your romance is dead in the water. He may have hang-ups about being romantically involved with a woman who has given birth -- or his preoccupation with your daughter could be sexual.
P.S. If your daughter has not already been made aware of the difference between appropriate and inappropriate touching, she is old enough now.