DEAR ABBY: After almost 30 years of marriage, my husband "Grant," took a long-distance trucking job. This leaves me alone on many Sundays and evenings, and I'm having a terrible time adjusting to it. I feel sad lots of times, like I'm living the life of a widow. Being a widow is terrible, but living like one while your husband is still alive seems worse.
I attend any social event that gives me contact with people while Grant is away. Sundays are difficult because I am limited to visiting older women who are widows. My children are grown and live hundreds of miles away, and I don't want to impose on my married friends who have their husbands to do things with.
Absence is supposed to make the heart grow fonder, but it makes me feel distant and bitter. Do other wives of airplane pilots, traveling salesmen, truckers, etc., feel the same way I do? How can I change my attitude? -- TRUCKER WIDOW IN TEXAS
DEAR WIDOW: The surest way to change your attitude is to start celebrating your independence instead of cursing it. You have too much time on your hands. Buy a pet, adopt a hobby, start taking classes while your husband is away, and fill those lonely hours of separation. You can be as happy as you make up your mind to be -- or as miserable. It's a question of mind over matter.