DEAR ABBY: I have been going out with "Elijah" for a year and a half. I love him, but sometimes he tries to get me to do things I really don't want to do sexually. I don't know how to tell him no, because I don't want him to hate me. I feel pressured every time I'm with him, and sometimes I'm scared to be alone with him. What should I do? I need help. -- WORRIED GIRLFRIEND IN N.C.
DEAR GIRLFRIEND: The most difficult word to say is also one of the shortest. It's "no." And yet the inability to say that simple word can complicate a person's life in ways you can't imagine.
If Elijah is pressuring you to do things you're not ready for, then as much as you love him, he is proving that he doesn't love you. If he would "hate" you for saying no, then he didn't love you to begin with -- you are being used. If you allow it to continue, it will make you feel ashamed and guilty, which can cause you problems in the future.
Please consider what I have said and strictly limit the time you spend alone with him. It's called avoiding temptation.