DEAR ABBY: I am writing in response to "Really Down in T-Town," whose truck-driving husband talks constantly. She said people dread it when they see him coming, and it has reached a point that she finds herself trying to avoid him at home.

The behavior she described sounds like it could be a symptom of adult ADHD. You were right to suggest that the husband might suffer from insecurity. ADHD will do that to you. However, like depression, it is a physiological problem rather than an emotional one. "Really Down" should have her husband assessed for adult ADHD. Therapy and medication can be a great help. My heart breaks for him. -- BEEN THERE IN CANADA

DEAR BEEN THERE: Thank you for the suggestion. That letter brought responses from many readers who viewed the problem in a different light. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: In my younger days I hitchhiked extensively from coast to coast. The longest rides were with truckers. They popped little white pills -- amphetamines -- to help them stay alert during long hauls. "Speed" is a great drug for loosening the tongue. The faster the mouth runs, the less discretion. Almost all of the drivers I rode with engaged in loud, nonstop talking. It took lots of patience to endure their rap -- but it was worth it to get where I was going.

Assuming that woman's description of her husband is accurate, he needs to detox -- the sooner the better. If he's at the point of driving others away, he's near "crashing" and could be unsafe on the road. In addition, his emotions could start seesawing, and he could become abusive. Please urge her to get him some help. -- BEEN THERE MYSELF IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR BEEN THERE: I'm printing your letter as a warning for those who might need one. However, readers with experience in the trucking business felt the wife should have more empathy for her spouse. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: I work in the safety department of a large trucking company. It has been my experience that most drivers talk a lot. Our drivers are long-haul truckers, who often spend long, lonely hours, weeks at a time, on the road. They need contact with another human voice. When they call in to the company, given the chance, they'll talk for hours. They love to tell stories of their adventures, and I have found that if I listen, I learn a lot.

Perhaps "Down in T-Town" should make a few trips with her husband. It might change her perspective. If, after she spends some time with him on the road, the problem continues, I would ask him to talk to the family doctor. -- KATY IN SPRINGDALE, ARIZ.

DEAR KATY: You may be onto something. I have a stack of letters from truckers' wives, all saying the same thing. One woman wrote: "It takes a special person to be a truck driver. People who work in offices and restaurants have co-workers to talk to and become friends with. It may not be that the husband needs counseling. He may just be lonely."

A former dispatcher in South Carolina said: "When a trucker gets home, he wants to talk to his wife because he hasn't had any other human contact all day -- especially from someone who loves him. Please tell 'Really Down in T-Town' she should make time to sit down and talk. That way her husband can get the emotional attention he's craving."

I have to agree that it's worth a try.

Abby shares more than 100 of her favorite recipes in two booklets: "Abby's Favorite Recipes" and "More Favorite Recipes by Dear Abby." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $10 (U.S. funds)

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DEAR ABBY: I met "Evan," the man of my dreams, when I was 18. He was 21. We had been dating only five months when he was diagnosed with leukemia. I stayed by his side the whole time, although my friends said no one would blame me if I didn't. Evan is now finished with chemotherapy and is in remission.

I was there for him when his parents couldn't be. I gave him everything I had. I even dropped out of school so I could work full time to make ends meet. Since Evan has finished his treatment, we've been trying to piece our life back together, but he has been horribly depressed.

I have tried to help. I found a psychologist for him. He agreed to go, then canceled the appointment. He re-enrolled in school this semester. However, I found out last night that he had stopped going to class a long time ago. He said it reminded him too much of how things used to be. He lied to me -- and not for the first time.

To make matters worse, I had to tell his parents, because they had been paying for school and sending us money to help with the bills. He had refused to call them. Abby, I love Evan with all my heart. His parents are offering to get him help. I'm torn between staying and leaving to rebuild my life. If he gets help for real, is it worth trying to save our relationship? -- EXHAUSTED AND BROKENHEARTED IN K.C.

DEAR EXHAUSTED: You supported Evan when he could not help himself. Only he can fix his problems now. The longer you allow the status quo, the longer he will postpone taking responsibility.

If he continues to procrastinate, then recognize that it's time to leave and put your own life on track. Do not feel guilty for doing so. Unless Evan accepts that he needs professional help -- and gets it -- he will drag you down with him. Trust me, you have done all you can.

DEAR ABBY: This is a fan letter. A friend of mine gave me a copy of your booklet "Keepers." I keep it on my nightstand with my early morning reading material. I like the little essay "Hugging" so much that we adopted a version of it into our daily lives. Our family says, "Hey, I need a little vitamin H," and it is followed with a big hug. We have also invented "vitamin P," which means a loving little pat.

Thought you would like to know what a positive influence one of your letters has been to our family -- we're spreading the word. -- ELIZABETH TYLER BROWN

DEAR ELIZABETH: Your letter warmed my heart. Everybody needs a diet rich in vitamins. My favorite is vitamin TLC, which I enjoy and dispense in liberal doses to everyone I love.

Readers, you can order "Keepers" by sending a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Keepers, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)

DEAR ABBY: "Divorced but Still in Love" asked if it was possible for a couple who had been divorced to make a go of marriage the second time around. You replied that it is possible, if the couple is willing (with the help of a marriage counselor) to confront the issues that broke them up the first time.

The same thing happened to me and my husband, "John." We were married at 18 and had a child at 21. We were both immature, too young to be married. After our divorce, we still spent time together as a family.

Two years later, I met and married "George." George and I had a child together, but he was not a good husband or father. Several months after I divorced George, John and I rekindled our relationship. We have been together for almost five years, married for 3 1/2 years and are blissfully happy together. John is a wonderful father to both boys and doesn't play favorites. I know it can work the second time around; our marriage is proof of it. -- OLDER AND WISER, TABOR CITY, N.C.

DEAR OLDER AND WISER: Congratulations to you both. Sometimes people fail to appreciate the value of what they have until it's gone. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I were married at 19. In first grade, I would kick him in the shins and then run like the dickens because I "liked" him. My first kiss was from him on my 16th birthday. After four years of separating and getting back together, he said enough is enough and filed for divorce.

Almost a year to the day our divorce was final, we remarried and have not been sorry. (We had continued to see each other and I became pregnant.)

While I don't recommend having a relationship like ours, we have been happy with our decision. Counseling would have been a great help, but we were too stubborn to get it even after we remarried. Long story short, we have been through a lot over the years -- even almost divorcing again -- but we're more in love than ever. With love and faith, we seem to get through it. -- STILL IN LOVE, WHITTIER, CALIF.

DEAR STILL IN LOVE: I'm pleased things are working out for the two of you -- but the next time you hit a rough patch, please reconsider counseling. It could save you both a lot of wear and tear on the spirit.

DEAR ABBY: My aunt and uncle have been divorced from each other twice. They remarried a third time and now have a healthy marriage. In spite of all their marital trials, their two grown sons are just fine. It just goes to show you that what God has joined, let no man put asunder.

If "Divorced" still loves her ex-husband, and he feels the same, then they should go for it. Today's society has made marriage something that's disposable, when in reality, it's not. It's a soul tie that's unbreakable. And yes, Abby, I agree that couple should seek marriage counseling -- this time to heal the damage of the divorce, as well as what went wrong the first time. -- BELIEVER IN SECOND CHANCES IN TEXAS

DEAR BELIEVER: Not all marriages are "soul ties." Some of them are dysfunctional and abusive. In those cases, divorce is healthier for all concerned. But as this column proves, divorce does not have to be the end. Sometimes, it's just another chapter.

DEAR ABBY: I don't have a problem. I just want to know why do so many weird people write you? -- BAFFLED IN WOODLANDS, TEXAS

DEAR BAFFLED: I don't know. Why did you?

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS, and getting along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)