DEAR ABBY: I am a 20-year-old bisexual female. I am madly in love with my partner, "Darci." We have been together for 10 short, wonderful months, but I know without a doubt in my heart that she's "the one" for me. She feels the same.
All I have ever really wanted out of life is to become a mother. I feel that is the reason I was born female, and I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I died without giving birth. I also don't want to become a mother in any other way except the "old-fashioned way."
Darci knows how I feel about this and says it's OK with her -- she wouldn't care if I was with a man for that purpose only. But whenever we talk about it, I get the feeling that she's only agreeing because she thinks it will hurt me if she doesn't.
I don't want to take her word for it and have it eventually ruin our relationship because she really isn't OK with it. So my question is, should I go ahead and try to have a baby in the old-fashioned way, or just forget it and not fulfill my one and only true dream because I love her so much and don't want to lose her? -- TORN IN OREGON
DEAR TORN: This is a question you and your partner should discuss with an obstetrician/gynecologist. Surely you are aware that you can be impregnated by artificial insemination, using donor sperm or the sperm of a donor you and Darci know. In that way, you could fulfill your dream without having to worry about arousing any insecurities in your partner. In your case, the method might be an improvement on the "old-fashioned way."