DEAR ABBY: Last March you printed a letter I wrote. In it, I told you I had expressed my desire to become the first female U.S. president, but my teacher and fellow students laughed at me.

Since writing to you, I have received a flood of support from friends, Dear Abby readers and you, yourself. But wait, there is more! I received a letter from Sen. John Kerry, and just recently, one from the White House signed by President Bush.

The fact that I received a response to my letter from that high up on the ladder of life has inspired me. I feel that I can now follow my dreams and help other young women my age to believe that they, too, can do whatever they want if they just trust themselves.

I have included a copy of what President Bush had to say, in case you want to print it, Abby. And thank you for your help. -- MARTA IN MARYLAND

DEAR MARTA: Thank you for the update, and for granting me permission to print the letter you received from President Bush. (I printed Sen. Kerry's letter last May.) That he would take time from his campaign schedule to offer you his support shows his belief in young people like yourself, who, in the years to come, will determine the future of our country. Read on:

"Dear Marta: I recently learned about your desire to be president of the United States.

"America is a great country, where people can dream big and achieve their full potential through hard work and determination. I encourage you to continue setting high goals, studying hard and helping others.

"The lessons you learn now will help you develop the character and values you need to succeed in life and become a responsible leader.

"Your idealism, hope and energy reflect the spirit of America and can help to build a better future for all our citizens.

"Mrs. Bush and I send our best wishes. May God bless you, and may God continue to bless America.

"Sincerely, George W. Bush"

DEAR ABBY: I cannot stand it when people drop in unannounced! My mother is the biggest offender. If our door isn't locked, she walks right in without knocking. My husband and I work hard all week and look forward to peace and quiet on weekends. It's disruptive when she "pops in" -- and she often stays for hours.

How can I tell her to call us before coming over? We have tried not answering the door, and even throwing on our coats like we were just leaving so she'll leave. I am so angry I can't even begin to think of a polite way to tell her to stop. -- SICK OF IT IN EAU CLAIRE, WIS.

DEAR SICK OF IT: I don't blame you for being angry, but you are placing the blame where it doesn't belong. Your mother isn't to blame for this situation -- you are.

Your mother may have no idea that you're so angry at her that you're ready to explode. Say something to her before you do. Tell your mother politely that you and your husband work hard all week and are not always prepared to entertain her on weekends. Explain that you and your husband would appreciate it if she called and arranged her visits in advance rather then dropping over. Then, if she persists, find the backbone to inform her that her visit is not convenient. Until you have the courage to act like an adult, she will continue to treat you like a child.

DEAR ABBY: I cannot stand it when people drop in unannounced! My mother is the biggest offender. If our door isn't locked, she walks right in without knocking. My husband and I work hard all week and look forward to peace and quiet on weekends. It's disruptive when she "pops in" -- and she often stays for hours.

How can I tell her to call us before coming over? We have tried not answering the door, and even throwing on our coats like we were just leaving so she'll leave. I am so angry I can't even begin to think of a polite way to tell her to stop. -- SICK OF IT IN EAU CLAIRE, WIS.

DEAR SICK OF IT: I don't blame you for being angry, but you are placing the blame where it doesn't belong. Your mother isn't to blame for this situation -- you are.

Your mother may have no idea that you're so angry at her that you're ready to explode. Say something to her before you do. Tell your mother politely that you and your husband work hard all week and are not always prepared to entertain her on weekends. Explain that you and your husband would appreciate it if she called and arranged her visits in advance rather then dropping over. Then, if she persists, find the backbone to inform her that her visit is not convenient. Until you have the courage to act like an adult, she will continue to treat you like a child.

DEAR ABBY: "Mitch" and I have been best-friends-with-benefits for nine years. He has a live-in girlfriend, "Edna," and they have an 11-month-old son together. The two of them are always fighting and yelling, and I'm always the peacemaker. I helped in raising their child so often that the boy called me Mom before he said it to Edna.

Two years ago, I told Mitch I wanted to be with him -- something more than just his girl on the side. He said he already knew it, but had been waiting for me to say it. He said he felt the same way, but he wasn't ready to go from one relationship to another.

When I first told him how I felt, he told me not to wait for him. He said if I did find someone, I shouldn't hold back because of him. When I finally did meet and date someone, Mitch got into an uproar about it and said he didn't like the guy. I ended the relationship to please him.

So here I sit, committed to someone who can't do the same for me, and feeling confused and lonely. I believe I am in love with Mitch. We still have a sexual relationship. I have tried to cool things down, but when I see Mitch, I just melt. Do you think he means what he says, or is he just telling me what I want to hear for what he can get? -- MISERABLE IN CONNECTICUT

DEAR MIZ: Let's review what Mitch has been saying: He said he has known for years that you're in love with him. He also told you not to wait for him. If Mitch loved you, do you really think he'd be living with someone else and telling you to move on? I don't.

Now let's look at what Mitch has been getting: He has someone who has continued to sleep with him in spite of the fact that he lives with someone else and fathered a child with her. On top of that, you're a free baby sitter and peacemaker. Enough about what he's getting. All you're getting is heartache.

I'll give Mitch high marks for salesmanship. But you shouldn't "buy" everything he sells you.

DEAR ABBY: I am employed by a national company to tutor high school students, one-on-one. For various reasons, I suspect that one of my students -- with whom I meet every one or two weeks -- may be smoking pot.

From a professional perspective, I feel this is none of my business. From a personal perspective, and as a parent myself, I am agonizing over whether I should bring my suspicions to the attention of his parent. If I were his parent, I would certainly want to know. Then again, my suspicions could be wrong. What is the ethical thing to do? -- UNSURE IN CONCORD, CALIF.

DEAR UNSURE: Your student's welfare IS your business. It's refreshing to know that someone is debating the "ethical" thing to do these days. If media reports are accurate, they lead us to believe that ethics have gone the way of the dinosaur.

Before approaching your student's parent, talk to the boy about your concerns. His problem may be something other than pot. At least give him a chance to explain. However, if your suspicions persist, by all means tell his parent what you have told me. You'll be doing both of them a favor.

To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)

DEAR ABBY: My mom baby-sits for my 3-year-old, "Jessica," while I am at work. Last night I arrived at Mom's to find that she had again left Jessica sleeping in the back seat of her van, still strapped into her car seat. Jessica had been there for an hour, and although the temperature outside was fairly mild, my little girl was red-faced and sweaty.

Mother says I'm overreacting because the van was parked in the driveway with the door left open. But I know of at least one incident last year when she left Jessica sleeping in the van, got distracted with something in the house, and didn't realize my daughter had awakened and been screaming for some time. For weeks, Jessica talked about being left outside alone.

I have asked Mom numerous times not to leave my child sleeping in the car, but her only response is to roll her eyes, tell me I'm making a big deal out of nothing, and continue to do it.

Maybe if Mom hears from someone other than me that it's not OK to leave a child unattended in a car, even in a driveway, she'll stop doing it. Thanks! -- OVERHEATED MOM IN MASSACHUSETTS

DEAR MOM: Do not expect your mother -- who is in denial -- to listen to me. These incidents are recurring because you are allowing it to happen. Your mother has proven repeatedly that she is too easily distracted and too forgetful to responsibly supervise your daughter. Recognize that your daughter is in danger and make other arrangements for her immediately. To paraphrase an old saying: If something happens once, shame on the perpetrator. If it happens twice -- shame on the "victim."

DEAR ABBY: My son works at a place where the employees celebrate birthdays by gathering for cake. One young employee seems bent on learning everyone's age. Although many people are reluctant to state their age, he persists with his questions to the point of embarrassment.

Abby, our son was a victim of downsizing and recently joined the group. His birthday is in early November, and he is dreading their "celebration" because he is over 50 and fears his supervisors will think he's too old for advancement. How should that young man's question be handled? -- MOTHER OF A MIDDLE-AGED SON

DEAR MOTHER: When the impudent question is asked, your son should reply with a smile, "I'm old enough to know better than to tell you." If the questioner persists, your son can put him in his place, and probably gain the appreciation of everyone else who's been put on the spot, by saying: "I'm 29 again, and I'll thank you not to pursue this any further. It's rude."

DEAR ABBY: There's a kid at school named Michael. I want to be friends with him, but I don't know what to do. Like me, he lost his dad. There is only one difference -- Michael can still see his dad. I have to wait until I'm dead to see mine. What should I do? I'd really like to be friends. -- FRIEND-SEEKER IN MICHIGAN

DEAR FRIEND-SEEKER: For starters, let him know he's welcome to eat lunch with you and your friends. If teams are chosen for sports, make it known you'd like him to be on yours. If you and your friends plan some activity after school, offer to include him. The surest way I know to make a friend is to be one.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)