Both of her parents are really protective, and she is not sure how to break it to them. She knows they have the right to know, and I want to tell them –- but how? -- AT A LOSS FOR WORDS, IN LAFAYETTE, LA.

DEAR AT A LOSS: "She" should ask her mother to make an appointment for her with a gynecologist because she needs to be put on birth control and also to learn what she needs to know about sexually transmitted diseases. It will be a shocker, but it is also the truth. If you are mature enough to be having sex, you must be mature enough to handle the consequences.

Anyone who is sexually active must have regular gynecological and/or urological examinations to ensure that she (or he) hasn't unknowingly picked up an STD. (To ignore an STD is to risk becoming sterile, and can be fatal.) Please don't put this off.

DEAR ABBY: Before he met me, my husband, "Stan," was involved with a crazy, alcoholic, self-centered woman. "Evelyn" has never been married, but she acts like she is Stan's ex-wife. She has never accepted the fact that he married me and not her.

She began making frequent crank calls to me at work shortly after the wedding. She follows me when I am alone. She has told everyone that Stan is impotent and has slandered my children. She even stole our family portrait from a studio that displayed it.

How can I get this crazy woman to leave me alone? I need help. -- STALKED IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR STALKED: You have my sympathy. She appears to be unbalanced. Notify the police that you are being stalked and obtain a restraining order. Then notify the phone company about the unwanted calls. If they can be traced to her, it is further proof of her harassment -– and there is a way to block them.

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating "Dale" for nearly two years. I am 32, he is 29, and he is everything my husband wasn't. Dale is wonderful to me and even more so to my two young daughters. He comforts us when we're sad. He takes care of us when we're sick. He even handles our finances and is always there for me regardless of the situation. He is a very romantic person who always makes me feel special.

My problem? He cannot carry on an intellectual conversation. He also lacks some language skills and doesn't always make "adult" decisions. In other words, although he's perfect in every other way, he lacks the mentality of a man his age.

Should I let him go? Sometimes I feel he may not be the one for me because he's not as smart as I think he should be. -- SECOND THOUGHTS IN TEXAS

DEAR SECOND THOUGHTS: Ideally, when people "couple up" they do it with individuals whose strengths compensate for their weaknesses. For many women, Dale's positive qualities would be enough, and he would be considered a prize. However, because intellectual accomplishment ranks high on your list of priorities, by all means let Dale go so he can find a woman who will love him for who he is, and you can find a partner who is more intellectually stimulating. You do not appear to be in love with him.

For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more attractive person, order "How to Be Popular." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: One day when my son was 8, he came home from school and announced, "Mommy, I know there's no Santa Claus!" The day I had dreaded was finally here.

I asked him why he believed that. He explained that his cousin, "Jason," had told him there was no such thing.

I looked him straight in the eye and, not knowing what else to say, said, "If you don't believe, you won't receive. NOW do you believe in Santa Claus?"

"Yes," he said.

The subject was not mentioned again until the next year, when I again asked him if he believed in Santa Claus. He piped up with, "Of course I believe in Santa Claus." We have repeated this scenario every year.

My son is now 22, and he still believes in Santa because you are never too old to believe in Santa Claus. -- PAM IN FLORIDA

DEAR PAM: Cousin Jason was a weasel, and I applaud your success in keeping a cherished tradition alive for your son. With an incentive like that, I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't also still believe in the Tooth Fairy.

DEAR ABBY: I would like to send a heartfelt thank-you to my guardian angel.

My boyfriend, "Geoff," invited me to join him for a weekend during a two-week business trip to California. We had a wonderful time.

Monday morning, I returned my rental car at the airport and checked my luggage. An hour before my plane was to depart, I heard myself paged over the intercom. I answered the call and heard Geoff's panicked voice. He had been unable to call my cell phone because the battery had run down. He had left the keys to his rental car in mine and had to get to work.

I ran back to the counter to book a later flight, but since I had already checked my luggage, it was impossible.

I had $1 in change in my pocket. I called the car rental company from a pay phone and they gave me the runaround. I began crying in frustration when a woman sitting nearby handed me her cell phone and said, "Here. Call whomever you need." I was speechless. I gratefully took her phone and called the car rental company back. They located Geoff's keys and agreed to deliver them.

When I handed the woman her phone, she said, "Now, call your boyfriend." I'll never forget her sympathy and generosity.

If she reads this, she'll know who she is. Thank you -- and God bless you for your kindness! -- GRATEFUL TO MY GUARDIAN ANGEL

DEAR GRATEFUL: At last! A positive story about someone with a cell phone. The woman who helped you was indeed an "angel." These days, many people prefer not to get involved when they see someone in a predicament. My hat is off to her.

DEAR ABBY: My son and his girlfriend have invited my wife and me to meet her parents for brunch at a restaurant in their home state 2 1/2 hours away.

My question: Who should pay the bill? The young couple, her parents -- or should the bill be split three ways? -- UNSURE IN UTAH

DEAR UNSURE: The people who do the inviting usually pick up the tab. When the check arrives, let it sit on the table for a minute or two. If your son and his girlfriend do not pick it up, then consider suggesting that the bill be split among the older generation.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: I am 25 and moved back to my hometown six months ago. Since my return, I have been socializing with a high school friend I'll call Josh. We go out fairly often and have become good friends again. Neither of us has any particular romantic interest in the other.

I invited Josh to escort me to the wedding of an old friend and he accepted.

After the reception, a group of us went to a mutual friend's for a hot-tub party. We were all having a great time, behaving like mature adults, until Josh went into the woods to make out with "Mandy," the 19-year-old cousin of one of the guests he met in the hot tub.

While Josh and I are just friends, I expected him to treat me with respect when he escorted me to the wedding and its attendant social functions. I felt hurt and humiliated by his actions, and I ended up leaving the party.

Perhaps I'm old-fashioned, but am I wrong to think Josh behaved badly? I would never have done that to him. I want Josh to realize how much he hurt me, but I also never want to speak to him again. What should I do? -- GOLDILOCKS IN FLORIDA

DEAR GOLDILOCKS: What Josh did was rude, immature and boorish -- but speak to him again. It seems he never learned that a gentleman doesn't leave the lady he's escorting for a "quickie." If he wanted to make time with Mandy, he should have taken her number and called her another time -- after you were escorted safely home.

To give him the silent treatment would be letting him off easy. It's better for both of you to tell him exactly what's on your mind. If he doesn't know better, he needs to hear it. Besides, he owes you an apology.

DEAR ABBY: I am 22. I have a job and am engaged to marry a very nice man named "Jim" next year.

My parents divorced when I was 9. Mother abandoned me and I went to live with my dad, who subsequently married a lovely lady, "Diane." Diane has been like a mother to me. She and Dad have been helping Jim and me with our wedding plans.

Now that I'm older, my real mom wants to be my mom again, and she's very manipulative. When we spend time together, she treats me like I'm 9 years old. Then she complains that I don't spend enough time with her. I have told her I'm busy and she can come visit me, too, but she doesn't.

Abby, I have a wedding to prepare for. I wanted both my "mothers" to be at my wedding, but now I'm beginning to feel uncomfortable. What should I do? -- BRIDE-TO-BE, CHEHALIS, WASH.

DEAR BRIDE-TO-BE: Continue with your wedding plans and stop feeling the need to explain yourself to the mother who abandoned you when you were 9. Either she has convenient amnesia, or for her, time has stood still. You can be manipulated or treated like a child only if you permit it, so don't fall into that trap.

To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Keepers Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)