DEAR ABBY: I am an 11-year-old girl who feels like I have lived long enough and it's OK to die. A girl at my school, "Kim," pressured me to give her my telephone number and the names of the boys I like. She gets her friends to threaten, corner and question me.

Now I get crank calls at least once a month. My mother called Kim's mother, but she accused me of treating her daughter badly! Kim has lied and hurt me severely. I don't know what to do. Please help. -- WANTING TO MOVE OUT OF CALIFORNIA

DEAR WANTING: If there is teasing, threatening, stalking or bullying going on at school, your teacher should be informed. If that doesn't put a stop to it, your parents should take the problem to the principal and, if need be, to the school board. You have a right to go to school without being cornered or intimidated.

Your mother should also arrange a get-together with Kim's mother and, without making any accusations, get to the bottom of what's going on. It will be time well spent.

DEAR ABBY: I am 27 and have been happily married to "Brian" for four years. Our first child is due in November. I couldn't be more excited about this baby. The problem lies with my husband. While I am sure Brian wants a baby and will love our child with all his heart, I am not sure he's ready for parenthood.

I realize that no one can ever be truly prepared for the life changes a baby can throw your way, but I'm afraid that this is not the right time in Brian's life for it. He swears that he is ready and has no regrets about my pregnancy. He claims that this is what life is all about. But I can't shake the feeling that my husband is not as ready as he claims.

I love Brian and know he'll be a great dad. However, I fear that our child may drive a wedge between us when he realizes that the baby's needs must come before his own. How can I be the mom I want to be and still keep my husband happy? -- EXCITED BUT WORRIED IN TENNESSEE

DEAR EXCITED: Since your husband has said repeatedly that he's happy about impending fatherhood, believe him. Relax and enjoy your baby. There will probably be times when you both may feel trapped and wish you could live life more spontaneously. All parents feel that way at times -- and when they do, they find a baby sitter and spend some adult time with each other.

I urge you not to obsess about the negative. That, more than anything else, could drive a wedge between you.

DEAR ABBY: You printed a letter from a woman who signed her letter "Mother of Invention." Years ago, my son, Jim, forgot my birthday, and I also sent my daughter-in-law a sympathy card with a note saying I didn't know my "negligent" son had died.

A few days later, a large bouquet of flowers arrived. Attached to the flowers was this card:

"Sorry to hear about your loss. He was a great son. We will always remember him for his timeliness. Love, Jim and Susan"

My thanks to "Mother of Invention" and to you for printing that letter. It brought back memories. -- MOTHER OF A GREAT SON IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR MOTHER: I like your son's sense of humor. I'll bet that was the last time he forgot your birthday.

To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)

DEAR ABBY: I have a serious problem with my supervisor at work. I'll call her Lydia. I began working for Lydia last year after being laid off for four months from another company. Since then, I've been picked on and harassed unmercifully. I find myself "walking on eggshells" and feeling anxious every day. Lydia is constantly looking for something about me to criticize. She does not treat anyone else this way, and I cannot figure out the best way to deal with her.

Please don't tell me to complain to the human resources department because I have already tried that. I was told to fill out a grievance report and submit it to Lydia's boss -- who I have heard say: "Lydia makes all the decisions. I trust her judgment and I support her to the end."

I have been documenting Lydia's treatment of me since last spring. I cannot afford to lose my job; however, I don't know if I have the emotional strength to tolerate the abuse much longer. -- TIRED OF GETTING YELLED AT IN DAYTON, OHIO

DEAR TIRED: Make sure you're doing a good job and are punctual about attendance. Continue documenting Lydia's treatment. Since "complaining" has not helped, present copies of your documentation to the human resources director. That should get the director's attention. If the situation doesn't improve, start looking for another job -- and send a copy of your documentation to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC), along with a letter of complaint.

DEAR ABBY: My 35-year-old daughter, "Linda," moved back home to live with my husband and me. She recently attempted suicide and is now going to counseling for substance abuse and depression. I have tried hard to avoid bringing up old issues that have created problems between us in the past. One issue that keeps recurring, however, is the embarrassing way Linda dresses. The clothes she wears make her look cheap and available.

Should we bite our tongues and keep our mouths shut? -- SILENTLY HURTING IN GEORGIA

DEAR SILENTLY HURTING: Refrain from saying anything critical that could be blown out of proportion at this sensitive time. Your daughter is dealing with far more serious issues than fashion faux pas right now. When it's appropriate, her counselor will probably address the issue of how she is packaging herself. So be patient. In situations like this, timing is everything.

DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Dan," and I divorced six years ago when our daughter, "Jessica," was 3 months old. Jessica and her father are very close and visit each other often. The problem is, Dan and his father had an argument several years ago and haven't talked since. Jessica has not seen her grandfather for several years, and she asks me what happened to him.

Would it be OK for me to contact Dan's father? I don't want to overstep my bounds or do anything to strain the friendly relationship I have with Dan. I don't see why Jessica can't visit her grandfather even though the "grown-ups" can't get along. Please advise. -- CONFUSED IN NORTHRIDGE, CALIF.

DEAR CONFUSED: Before making any phone calls to Grandpa, first discuss it with Dan. Tell him that Jessica has been asking about her grandfather. It's possible that your daughter's request will cause some fences to be mended, so think positive.

To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Keepers Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)

DEAR ABBY: I need your help. I am 28 years old and have two great parents. Their marriage has not always been the best.

My mom confided to me the other night that she has been seeing a man who works with her. I couldn't believe it. Mom is a recovering alcoholic, sober for 12 years -- and since she met this man, she goes out with him several times a week for drinks and dinner.

I am ready to fall apart. My teenage sister is in drug rehab, and now my mother starts drinking again, cheats on my father and asks me not to tell. On top of that, I have a child with disabilities. What am I to do?

I love my parents dearly. Should I tell my dad about the other man? I have asked my mom to stop, but she says this man "treats her like a queen." -- STRESSED TO THE MAX IN THE SOUTH

DEAR STRESSED: For your sanity, take yourself out of the middle. As much as you love them, you are not responsible for saving your parents' marriage. Your father must be aware on some level that your mother is drinking again.

"Queens" have been known to lose their heads, and it appears your mother has lost hers. The next time she confides in you about her Prince Charming, tell her you refuse to be her confidante. Silence makes you an accomplice. Give your mother a deadline to come clean with your father, and tell her if she doesn't tell him what's going on by then, you will. Between your mother and your sister, your father has enough problems. He doesn't need a sexually transmitted disease on top of everything else.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 20-year-old college student living at home. I recently met a guy I'll call "Sandy" over the Internet. I found his e-mail address on an e-pals site and wrote to him. We have been chatting online almost every night and have fallen in love.

Sandy and I are serious about each other, and he is who he says he is, because I have done some background checks on him. I am planning on traveling to see him as soon as I earn the money. (He lives in Australia.)

My problem is my parents. They are very protective and refuse to accept how I feel about Sandy. They worry because I met him on the Internet.

How should Sandy and I approach my parents? We thought about Sandy writing them a letter, but I don't know if that would work. Please help. -- IN LOVE IN THE U.S.A.

DEAR IN LOVE: I understand your parents' concern, because people are not always what they represent themselves to be on the Internet. However, many people have found true love via the information superhighway, so the fact that you met Sandy online should not automatically rule him out. Ask him to visit you and your family, rather than you making that first move. It would prove his sincerity and give your parents a chance to ease their concerns by giving him the traditional "once-over." I wish you the best of luck.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)