DEAR ABBY: I am 28 years old and pregnant with my first child. My beloved father passed away a few years ago, and my mother has since remarried. Mom keeps calling her new husband "Grandpa."
I'm having a hard time with this. Even though this man will become a part of my child's life, he is not Grandpa. Both grandfathers have passed away, and it's going to be tough enough making sure they are properly remembered.
Maybe I'm being overly protective of this "grandfather" thing, because my sweet dad can't be here to share the joy of our baby. I need advice on how to go about telling my mother that I'd prefer she didn't call her husband "Grandpa." I know this should be the least of my problems, but it's been nagging at me. -- KATIE IN VIRGINIA
DEAR KATIE: Please rethink your stance on this. Although you loved your dad and keep his memory in your heart, your mother's flesh-and-blood husband will be the only grandpa your child will ever know. If you tell your mother that you don't want her husband to be called "Grandpa," you run the risk of driving a wedge between you, her and him. Grief counseling may help you deal with your dear father's death. Accept the love your mother's husband has to offer and move on.