DEAR ABBY: I was going through my grandmother's Bible and found this old column of yours tucked between the pages. It is yellowed with age, but I laughed aloud when I read it. I had no idea that Grandma read your column. I thought you might like to print it again so others may enjoy it as I did. -– MIMI SEVERA, BLOOMINGDALE, ILL.
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DEAR MIMI: I'm sure they will -– and that's no bull. Read on:
DEAR ABBY: We have a cow on our farm named Helen Mae and she hates women. Helen Mae is a beautiful Guernsey with soft brown eyes and a gentle manner, but she won't let a woman within 20 feet of her. She's very friendly to all men whether she's seen them before or not, but any woman who has tried to milk her has had to run for her life. You can't fool Helen Mae, either. She can tell women from men regardless of how they're dressed.
Is there any explanation for this? And if you can find out if there is some way to get Helen Mae to let a woman milk her, I'd appreciate it, as my husband can't always get to her at milking time. –- FARMER'S WIFE
DEAR WIFE: None of my farm experts have studied psy-cow-ology, but they tell me that cows have their hang-ups just like humans. However, I'll milk my readers and try to come up with an udder opinion.