DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married 10 years. We have three beautiful children under the age of 8.
Two years ago, "Curt" lost his wedding ring. One year ago, he had an affair with a co-worker. Curt realized the affair was a mistake and decided to come back. I was willing, but asked that he get a new wedding ring to show his recommitment to our marriage.
It has now been 10 months since his return, but he still has not gotten a new ring. I even asked him to get one for himself as my Christmas present -- and still no ring.
Abby, I don't feel I can trust him. He says I am "blowing this out of proportion," and that he is committed. In counseling he brushes it off as, "I know ... I know ..."
I love Curt very much, but wonder if I should be with someone who not only hurt me but shrugs off my one request for closure and healing.
Am I making a big deal out of nothing, Abby? What do you think? -- HURT AND UNSURE IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR HURT AND UNSURE: I don't think you're making a big deal out of nothing. I'm pleased the two of you are in counseling together, because that's where you need to be. Although you have reconciled, for some reason your hubby hasn't fully recommitted himself to the marriage. During your next session, ask him what a wedding ring symbolizes to him, and why he's stalling. Then be very quiet and listen.