DEAR ABBY: I am 19 and have been in a relationship with "Joe" for several years. His mother, "Roxie," is pushy and manipulative. I've seen her blow things out of proportion with other people.
Last night, thinking we had privacy, Joe and I talked about getting married. We were only bringing the subject up –- we have no intention of marrying right now.
Today at work, Roxie called me and said she "overheard" Joe and me talking, and already had someone lined up to bake the wedding cake. She also knows the "perfect place" for our wedding reception –- and she wants me to wear her wedding dress from 35 years ago. I was so shocked, all I could say was, "I'll talk it over with Joe."
Abby, how can I stop her from butting into our lives without starting a conflict? -– WHAT TO SAY IN SAN ANTONIO
DEAR WHAT TO SAY: You and Joe should thank his mother for her generosity and tell her that it was only a preliminary conversation, and that no wedding is yet being planned. Assure her that if things change, she'll be the first to know.
P.S. Instead of feeling defensive, you should be flattered. Her positive reaction indicates how much she approves of you.