DEAR ABBY: I read your column every day and appreciate the forum you provide for people to reach a large audience in an objective and effective way. I witnessed something the other day that could cause financial harm, and I feel your readers should be warned to be more careful.

My family had lunch in a busy fast-food restaurant. Seated at a table next to us was a gentleman conducting business over his cell phone. Since the restaurant was busy and loud, he raised his voice to be heard on the phone. Abby, he gave his credit card number, the expiration date, the name on the credit card and which credit card he was using! Anyone could have written that information down and used it for his or her own purposes.

Please warn your readers to be careful about giving out private information where it can be overheard. -- CONCERNED IN ANAHEIM

DEAR CONCERNED: Consider them warned. A lapse of judgment like that can wreak havoc on one's financial history. Readers, beware -- you never know who might be listening.

DEAR ABBY: I have been involved with a man since last November. I have opened up every aspect of my life and my home to him. Because of his work, he travels quite a bit, and while he is gone, he doesn't stay in contact. As long as he is "working" out of town, he won't call. When he returns, he calls to let me know. Sometimes days -- or even weeks -- have gone by without any word from him.

I'm at the end of my rope. I have tried explaining to him on several occasions how this makes me feel; nothing has helped. My friends tell me to lose him, but I really love the guy. Short of exploding on him the next time he calls, what should I do? -- SLEEPLESS IN OKLAHOMA

DEAR SLEEPLESS: Exploding won't help. Distancing yourself might.

He knows how you feel about his disappearing act. By not calling, he is giving you an unmistakable message: out of sight, out of mind. Although you have "opened up every aspect of your life and home" to him, he has not reciprocated.

Your friends may be on to something. Lose this loser. He will never make you happy.

DEAR ABBY: I could not agree more with your advice to "Had It in Houston" regarding the unruly neighbor child. The girl's neglectful parents would send her over "uninvited and unwanted" whenever they saw the family outdoors together.

I encountered a similar situation. This is how I handled it. I told the child, "Honey, your face is dirty -- let me wash it," or, "Honey, we don't speak to one another like that, we say this ..." or, "Sweetheart, if you cannot obey the rules here, you will have to go home now. I'm sorry." Or, "It's time for you to go home now. We'll see you tomorrow."

Abby, "Houston" must realize that this is a child, not an adult guest. Different rules apply. Also, what goes in their ears comes out of their mouths -- so use your firm, kind, gentle voice. -- EVERYBODY'S MOM, EL CAJON, CALIF.

DEAR MOM: You're a generous and caring woman. Having read your letter, I can only conclude that "everybody" is lucky to have an adult like you in their lives.

For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more attractive person, order "How to Be Popular." Send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: A friend of mine recently drove my son home from baseball practice. When I met him in the driveway, he looked, sounded and smelled like he'd been drinking. I was so surprised I didn't say anything to him until several days later. I was also not positive my suspicion was correct since I talked to him for only a minute.

When I did ask if he was feeling OK that day (I didn't want to accuse him outright of drunk driving), he explained that he had been coming down with the flu and "wasn't himself" that day.

Now I don't know what to believe. I know he has a DUI on his record. It worries me to think he may have been under the influence, yet I have never actually seen him drink. I know he has strict rules against drinking in front of children, and I know he didn't drink at the Little League practice, but I'm still uncomfortable with the whole situation.

I have been making up excuses why I have been driving my son since then, but it's difficult not telling him the truth since practice is on his way home from work. Should I tell him the truth about my suspicions? Our sons are best of friends, and I'm afraid it would ruin our friendship. -– IN A QUANDARY IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR IN A QUANDARY: People who are coming down with the flu do not reek of alcohol. Your son's safety must come first. Under no circumstances should you allow him to ride with anyone you suspect of having a drinking problem. If your friend asks you why you no longer want him to drive your son home from Little League practice, be honest and do not mince words. It's your duty as a parent to protect your child, and that's far more important than sparing this person's feelings.

DEAR ABBY: My wife has recently started going out late at night, around 2 a.m., after the kids and I are asleep. She says she can't sleep. She also says that since she's home all day with the kids, it's the only time she can see some of her friends. I feel this is wrong, but she says it's no big deal.

Abby, this is tearing our marriage apart. When I talk to her about this, she says I'm trying to control her. Is she right? Is that what I'm trying to do? -- FRUSTRATED IN OREGON

DEAR FRUSTRATED: No. Rather than trying to control her, you are trying to save a marriage that's in big trouble. Who could she possibly be hanging out with at that hour? A colony of bats?

You would have to have bats in your belfry to allow this to continue. You and your wife are overdue for marriage counseling. Don't put it off.

DEAR ABBY: In your response to "Incensed in Wyoming," who complained that people give her unsolicited advice about having more children, you told her to say, "Our factory is closed." Abby, you failed to give her the rest of the saying. It's "Our factory is closed, but the playground is still open." -- HAVING FUN IN LANSING, MICH.

To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: I just learned something about an acquaintance I have known for about 12 years. She was my customer until I stopped working a few months ago. I have taken her out for coffee once a month to stay in touch and keep with the news.

Last week, after coffee, she took her time leaving the table. I glanced back and was shocked to see her pick up the tip I had left for the server. I watched her again today as we were leaving the coffee shop. She did it again.

Abby, I like her, but I no longer want to take her out for coffee, especially not in this restaurant. It's one my husband and I visit frequently. I'm embarrassed that the servers haven't been getting my tips and must think I'm cheap.

How do I handle this friendship, and how do I walk into that restaurant again without hanging my head? -- BAFFLED IN TACOMA

DEAR BAFFLED: You may have been acquainted with this person for 12 years, but you're just now getting to know her. How to "handle the friendship"? Confront her. Ask if she's having financial difficulties. Lay down the law and tell her you will not stand for this kind of behavior.

As for the personnel who have been stiffed: Talk to the manager of the restaurant and offer to make good the gratuities that have been pocketed by your guest.

DEAR ABBY: I belong to a group that meets weekly for potluck dinners. Several guests regularly help themselves to two servings of an entree and several pieces of bread before everyone has had the opportunity to get a first serving.

Because of this, there is often no meat or bread left for those at the end of the line. Others eat quickly and get back in line for second and third helpings before some have had their first!

This can only be described as gluttony, and it has upset members of our group. Should we appoint a leader and announce the buffet-line rules before the dinner begins, or should we speak to the offenders individually? -- OFFENDED IN TEXAS

DEAR OFFENDED: I think an etiquette lesson is in order. Don't single out the culprits; it would only embarrass them. Make a general announcement of the rules before dinner. Alternatively, designate members to "serve" sensible portions. That should put a stop to the pigging out.

DEAR ABBY: When a spouse dies, I know that many people continue to wear their wedding rings. However, after a divorce, how soon must you remove them? -- EVE IN ALABAMA

DEAR EVE: Tradition and the rules of etiquette dictate that when a woman is no longer married, she removes her wedding band. The rings can be disposed of in any way she sees fit. (Some women have them made into earrings!) However, I find it curious that anyone would persist in wearing a reminder of a painful experience on her ring finger, left hand -- which would discourage attention from someone who might be suitable.

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS, and getting along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)