DEAR READERS: Mail still continues to arrive regarding the 80-year-old talkaholic. People identified strongly with that letter. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: Take this storyteller to any grammar school, rest home or veterans hospital. The list is endless.

Our 7-year-old grandson invited Grandpa to visit his second-grade classroom and tell them about growing up on a ranch and being a real cowboy. The children hung on my husband's every word. (Grandpa also brought relics to show.) Our 10-year-old grandson was green with envy and quickly asked Grandpa to visit his classroom -- another success.

Rotary, church and civic groups all ask this natural storyteller to reminisce when a scheduled speaker fails to appear. They know Russ remembers details about the development of our area's water, roads, subdivisions, politics -- even though he may not recall today's date.

These "talkaholics" are a national treasure. Please urge your readers to utilize these people. They have the time, plus priceless memories to share with all age groups. -- TALKAHOLIC'S PROUD WIFE IN SAN DIEGO

DEAR PROUD WIFE: You're right. Our seniors are a precious resource, and like our other national resources they should not be ignored because they cannot last forever. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: That 80-year-old gentleman's family might suggest to him that a written account of his youth is needed because his experiences are far too important to lose. These stories should be recorded for future generations.

If for some reason he's unable to record them himself, enlist the help of another family member -- perhaps a grandchild -- to record those stories and preserve those precious memories. If necessary, use a tape recorder or video camera.

I would treasure such an account. The older you get, the more interesting are the lives of family members who came before you. Every life has experiences, both good and bad, that are worth preserving. Someday, an enterprising family member might want to combine all the accounts into a book. Wouldn't you love to have such an account of your family? I would! -- CURIOUS ABOUT GRAMPS, SLIDELL, LA.

DEAR CURIOUS: Yes, I would. Unfortunately, my parents -- and many other relatives -- were reluctant to discuss in detail what life was like in Russia before they immigrated to the United States. Those stories are forever lost to me. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: Older people tell us the world as they see it. The stories they relate may be entertaining, teach a moral, involve an old trauma they are trying to work through, or be part of the significance of their lives or relationships. These stories are pure gold.

Ask for details about how things looked, when it happened, who else they knew at the time, where their brothers, sisters and parents were when it happened, what foods they served and what music was popular. If you're tired of a particular story, ask lots of questions. Help them remember another story you haven't heard -- anything they might recall that could have taken place in their lives.

I wish my father, aunts and uncles would have allowed me to tape-record their stories, but none would. Perhaps they were ashamed of their accents. They are all dead now. How I wish I could enjoy them just once more. -- ARLYNN GRIMM, LIVERMORE, CALIF.

DEAR ARLYNN: Hold a good thought. If you believe in an afterlife, your wish will come true.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: I have a problem with my father-in-law. When my husband, our two young sons and I visit his parents out of state several times a year, my father-in-law gives my sons beer.

My husband has talked to his father several times and told him that alcohol is an adult drink, and the boys may not drink it with our approval until they are 21. My in-laws are both big drinkers, and when we mention it they act offended.

Last weekend, my father-in-law gave our 19-month-old several sips of beer. I kept quiet because my husband's 90-year-old grandfather was visiting, and I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable. (I didn't think my father-in-law would listen to me anyway.)

I've told my husband that it is disrespectful for his dad to continue giving our kids something when we've asked them not to. My husband's response is, "I've asked him to stop, but I don't want to say anything else about it because I don't want to 'make any waves.'" He is always making excuses for his dad, even when he called our firstborn an "ugly monkey."

My husband got upset when I told him that the kids and I would not attend any more family gatherings for a while.

Am I being irrational? Should I continue to let my father-in-law give my children alcohol even though it is against my beliefs? Help! -- ANGRY ARIZONA MOM

DEAR MOM: Providing alcohol to minors is against the law. Under no circumstances should you permit your father-in-law to give your children sips of alcoholic beverages. Alcohol is an acquired taste, and this could create a dependency that could lead to disastrous results in later years.

It is your and your husband's responsibility as parents to protect your children from harm, and alcohol is harmful to children. If you permit them to be given such drinks for fear of making waves or making others uncomfortable should you protest, your priorities are misplaced. Should it mean keeping your children from visiting their grandparents in order to protect them, then so be it.

DEAR ABBY: I have two ideas for "Steamed in Minnesota," who has uninvited "moochers" show up on weekend afternoons, loaf around until dinnertime and expect to get a free meal.

One: Don't serve dinner, crackers or refreshments of any kind. Just sit around, be polite, wait it out, and don't act hungry. (Think of it as playing "chicken" over chicken!)

Two: A couple of hours before these moochers expect to be given a free meal, announce that earlier in the day you made dinner reservations at the "Fantastico Room" at the "Ritzy Hotel" -- and if they call now, you are sure they can get a table near yours. -- PREVENT MOOCHERS IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR PREVENT: Your solutions are creative, but some of these loafers are pros at the game. So, one: Be prepared to starve; and two: If they call your bluff, be sure to ask the servers at the "Ritzy Hotel" for separate checks!

NOT CONFIDENTIAL TO MORT PHILLIPS: Happy anniversary. Every night is New Year's Eve and every day is Thanksgiving since you married me. Thank you for making me the luckiest woman alive.

For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more attractive person, order "How to Be Popular." Send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: Several years ago my father-in-law suffered a stroke. He is now able to live by himself, but my husband, "Frank," and I deliver his meals, handle his finances and take him to his doctor's appointments.

My dilemma is that my father-in-law treats me better than he does Frank. It hurts Frank's feelings to hear his father say nasty things and accuse him of not helping. Frank is an only child, and he does everything for his father.

I promised Frank I would not say anything to his father about how unkind he is, but it gets harder every day to keep my mouth shut.

Frank and I are extremely close, and I can't stand to see him hurt. Should I stay out of it like I promised, or should I get more involved? -- ANGRY DAUGHTER-IN-LAW

DEAR ANGRY: Start by confidentially asking your father-in-law's doctor if the stroke affected the part of his brain that regulates personality, behavior and mood. If your father-in-law treated Frank more kindly before the stroke, his agitation may be the result of the illness.

Depression is common in stroke victims, and is treatable through medication, psychotherapy and behavior modification. If your father-in-law has any insight into his abusive behavior, it can be adjusted. If not, your husband, through counseling, must learn behavioral strategies so he can avoid "triggering" an emotional outburst from his father.

For more information, contact the National Stroke Association, 9707 E. Easter Lane, Englewood, CO 80112-3747. The telephone number is 1-800-STROKES (1-800-787-6537), and online: www.stroke.org.

DEAR ABBY: When is it proper to use a preprinted mailing label? Over the past year I have received thank-you notes, holiday cards and wedding invitations with mass-produced mailing labels stuck on the envelopes.

Whatever happened to handwritten names and addresses? Am I expecting too much? I feel as if the sender is rushed and ungrateful. -- UNGLUED IN MASSACHUSETTS

DEAR UNGLUED: While it is still considered proper to hand-address personal correspondence such as invitations and thank-you notes, people are so rushed these days that it is often more convenient to use printed labels. (Also, they are more legible.)

Ask yourself what is more important, the envelope or its contents?

DEAR ABBY: I read with interest the columns you printed about the importance of health-care professionals washing their hands. But what about food handlers?

Whenever I am at deli counters, I have had to ask the workers to please change their gloves. They leave the work area, open doors, go from bloody roast beef to cheese displays, then pleasantly ask, "May I help you?"

I have repeatedly requested that supermarket managers do something about it. Nothing gets done. It's disgusting. -- FRUSTRATED IN BRYANTVILLE, MASS.

DEAR FRUSTRATED: The employees you mentioned may not have received proper training; perhaps you would see some results if you complained to the county health department. If there isn't a regulation against this, there should be.

To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)